chloeturner
Warren Veteran
Dear Poppy,
10 years ago you came into my life. 10 years since we went to the RSPCA to look at adding to our family. I remember going to see you, you looked so very sad in the kennels, it was clear you were not a dog who would do well to be in kennels. We took you down to the exercise pen to see how you were with children (the staff don't think you had encountered children before as your previous owners had used you for breeding and left you unattended). From then on it was clear you didn't have a bad bone in your body and I took to you immediately. We played fetch for 20 mins before we had to leave, and you went and rolled in poop before coming back to me for a fuss :lol:
Unfortunately, someone else had a reserve on you. I very nearly did not have my soul dog. I don't know how anyone could've changed their mind over your sweet little face, but thankfully they did, and a few days later we had a homecheck and picked you up.
Your first day with us, we just had to bath you. They hadn't done a very good job of washing the poop off that you rolled in and you were a bit smelly! You were so frightened you pooped in the bath, good job we were having it replaced anyway! :lol:
That was just the start of a very special friendship that lasted a decade Poppy, and I feel so very lucky to have been your mum for such a long time.
This is one of my favourite photos, the way you are just looking at me, like you did so very often.
It still feels very raw at the minute Poppy, I'm struggling to see through the fog of all the bad that has happened these past few days, but I will try to look through all of the bad and make this as much about you as possible.
You absolutely loved the snow. You would chase the snowballs and then stick your nose in the snow, wondering where it had gone :lol: I used to hate taking you out when the snow had turned to ice. If we went with my OH and his dog, he would purposely get you excited about the snow and I would end up pulled onto my backside :lol:
I also remember, when we hadn't had you very long and before you started coming to bed with me, you had a soft bed in the kitchen under the worktop. You had been in season and we came in one day and you had humped the poor bed so much that it was just in pieces all over the kitchen floor. You never had a stuffed bed like that ever again! I had save up for a month to buy you that bed :lol:
You have followed me around for the past 10 years, and you have been my very best friend and soul mate. I think that is perhaps what I am going to miss the most. At every turn, you would be laid at the top of the stairs while I showered and washed my hair or brushed my teeth.
These are photos of you before I went on holiday with my OH last year, a week, the longest I ever left you in our whole 10 years together. And you weren't very impressed as I packed my case.
You have occasionally done some very naughty things which include rolling in things you shouldn't, and eating lots of bunny poop when we have forgotten to shut the doors! :lol:
But you loved nothing more than snoozing with me on the sofa. Our last Christmas spent together.
I eventually bought you a memory foam bed, to rest your tired legs and body on.
I remember taking you to my OH's allotment, he lost his caravan steps so I picked you up to put you inside as it started raining, I bent over and heaved you up and as I did, you trumped! The lady on the next allotment thought it was me, I almost died with embarrassment.
Then, last Wednesday, you were very poorly. You sicked up all of your dinner and we assumed the heat was getting to you. Thursday, you just weren't right so we called the vets and by the time your appointment came I had to carry you out to the car as you didn't want to move. They kept you in for some xrays and scans, and we picked you up Friday morning. They said they couldn't find the cause and to keep an eye on you. I slept downstairs with you Friday night, well, I say slept but I was awake most of the night.
You finally settled at about 5am, and as I was on the floor with you, you laid next to me with your head nestled in my arms and relaxed your body next to mine.
Saturday, you still would not eat. We took you back to the vets and they did want to keep you Poppy but I was selfish and wanted you to come home. We had only been back at home for a couple of hours when I knew I had made the wrong decision, and so we took you back in.
I think a part of me knew that you were very very poorly, as I cried in the taxi all the way to the vets.
Saturday evening the vets called and my heart sank into my stomach. They had a specialist look at scans of your stomach and something very sinister was going on inside of you. There was no guarantee of survival with this operation and I made the very difficult decision of letting them go through with operating. I am glad that I did Poppy, I don't regret a single thing. I needed to give you that chance, and you pulled through. You were such a strong dog Poppy and I am very very proud of you.
Part of your intestines had died and it was very painful for you. The vets think your intestines must have twisted and cut off blood supply, before somehow untwisting themselves. They removed this and stitched 2 bits of intestines together, and told me the next few days would be touch and go for you. I felt devastated. I wanted to be there with you but couldn't. I hope you forgive me for this Poppy, I left you where you needed to be.
Sunday, we went up to coax you to eat. You wouldn't take anything, so we left and the vets syringe fed you and you took it and was looking brighter.
Then Monday morning came. That phone call to say you weren't doing good and we should prepare ourselves. They had you on morphine and something else that I'm not quite sure of. At 1pm we just got a taxi and came to see you, and I just knew that it was your time. You looked so tired and fed up, and your stomach kept filling with fluid. The vets took a sample and strongly suspected peritonitis. I just knew that I didn't want you to be prodded with anymore needles, or spend another night in pain in a strange kennel away from home.
I sobbed and sobbed, you were taken into a consulting room, and I cradled your head and told you I loved you over and over as you quietly slipped away.
I hope you know that was not an easy decision, but one that I felt was right for you. You were not a kennel dog and I don't believe you would have got better. So because I loved you, I let you go in the way I know you would have wanted - with dignity and in my arms.
I miss you Poppy. I miss you so very, very much. Lots of people have dogs, but I firmly believe - and have been told as much in the last few days - that very few people have a bond with their dog like I had with you. I was totally devoted to you, and the feeling was certainly mutual. Whoever was fussing you, whoever was talking to you, you only had eyes for me.
You were most definitely a once in a lifetime kind of dog. I love you more than words can ever say and I just can't believe you are gone.
Until we meet again, Poppy. I love you. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Run free at the bridge beautiful Poppy. 
