tlcwrites
Mama Doe
This is hard. This is very hard. I knew it was potentially on the cards for some time, especially in the past week or so. But even that knowledge, even having booked her in the day before with our favourite vet, doesn't make any of this ever easier.
Losing Rabbits never does. They do too much to me.
Whilst she's been here, Iris has always been ill. I picked it up quickly. If the "adoption centre" at a well-known petstore chain had picked it up and she'd been treated swiftly, maybe she'd still be here today. But I want to mostly avoid thinking about her as a sick bunny. Because even though she was ill, she still demonstrated an incredible zest for life.
Iris came into my life in November. She came to me with her sister, Arce. We adopted them to be upstairs houserabbits. Houserabbits which I would have direct contact with for most of the day, as a sort of therapy. And of course, they were also adopted because they needed a new home.
They had been surrendered because the owners were moving house. They were four and a half. That kind of thing breaks my heart. But if they hadn't been cast aside, I would never have had the joy of getting to know Iris. And Iris and Arce, as a unit.
They loved each other deeply. But Iris was clearly dominant, and oftentimes she would be humping her. One of the most common phrases in the house became "Iris, stop humping your sister!" Goodness knows what the neighbours thought if they could hear it. But it wasn't just humping. There were always major grooming sessions. Grooming sessions where both girls would be grooming one another on the back. I even have a video of it somewhere.
Iris was the leader to Arce's follower. Iris was always the one who went somewhere first. She was first on the bed. First to get Fibafirst treats. First to instigate nortiness. She destroyed OH's headphones. She nibbled holes in my duvet covers and bed sheets. She loved eating cardboard - thank goodness she didn't add stasis to her issues with me! She also took chunks out of me several times. One time, she even bit my finger so hard that I ended up with a little nerve damage in it. I will literally carry a mark of her with me at all times as a consequence. She really put my bunnyproofing to the test, continually showing me all the flaws in the system. She even destroyed my handbag!
But Iris wasn't always first to things as she was completely deaf. She needed to be "told" it was dinner time by Arce if she was busy with hay when pellets came out. Sometimes she'd just be fast asleep as a loaf. Noise could make Arce scatter but Iris would just sit there, wondering what the fuss was about. Her notes at the adoption didn't mention her deafness; the only reason I figured it out was adopting Erasmus, my lovely deaf tri lop, from honeybunnies and comparing their behaviour. Being deaf didn't bother her much. She only nipped if she was surprised, like the finger incident.
Like Arce, Iris was a very keen dead bunny flopper. Both girls made a show of it. I do believe that Iris and Arce would have competitions on who could be the best dead bunny flopper in the household. Unfortunately for Iris, Arce definitely had her beat on that front, but only because Arce is such a show off with them!
It took until her last week to introduce fresh to her diet as she had a regular problem with uneaten caecatrophs despite losing weight for a long while. At least that was one issue we cracked. She loved her fresh food right up until a few minutes before she passed. At least she was still comfortable enough to eat until she died.
And like Arce, again, Iris was very much a daddy's girl. She adored him, and he adored her. Every night he'd go to bed and tell them both, that they were "soooooo beautiful" and "such beautiful bunnehs". He's a proper country boy, and seeing him go so soft over rabbits, which he's been brought up to see as pests, makes me go gooey inside. Since he's known me, he's become a proper rabbit person, even if wildies are still "pests but cute pests" to him. He still said goodnight to both girls last night, when we left Iris's body for Arce to say her goodbyes. But she loved playing toy cups with him - he'd give her a toy cup and she'd toss it aside, over and over again. The same with twigs.
The past week, with finishing the Depocillin and trying panacur, she was still slipping. She lost around 400g in two weeks. Her litter training went completely awry. She stopped humping Arce quite so much. Most things she was doing, it was by rote. She barely even investigated the pipe under my bed we added for new enrichment for them.
Throughout all of her treatments, she was her indomitable self. She took things in her stride, except maybe oral meds. She would try and paw those away from her mouth. I think she was one of the rare rabbits where injectibles were so much easier to deal with for her. Even though I was very inexpertly jabbing her with Depocillin, she took it in her stride. She would have her treatment in a separate room, and then take herself back away and return to Arce as if nothing much had happened. Only after digging up at the bed covers first, though. Depocillin helped clear up the, frankly impressive, sneezing, but it was too little too late. My heart is cracked open.
Iris sweetheart, you were so dominant you didn't always see eye to eye with us humans. I hope you had an adequate retirement home with me. I like to think you grew to love me, especially in the end. I wish I could have saved you, but you were getting so frail. I didn't want you to be utterly miserable when you passed. That would have been so, so unfair on you. You deserved only the best. You got me. I hope I was good enough.
You were here for a short period of time. You got delivered such a cruel hand in your last months of life. It's not fair. I hope I added some light to it. After all, you caught my eye and my heart the moment I saw you. Rest easy, beautiful. Your daddy and I will look after Arce, who misses you more than words can say. Go meet my other bridge bunnies, go show them who's boss. They'll love you. This isn't goodbye, just adieu. Until we meet again, lovely. xxx
Losing Rabbits never does. They do too much to me.
Whilst she's been here, Iris has always been ill. I picked it up quickly. If the "adoption centre" at a well-known petstore chain had picked it up and she'd been treated swiftly, maybe she'd still be here today. But I want to mostly avoid thinking about her as a sick bunny. Because even though she was ill, she still demonstrated an incredible zest for life.
Iris came into my life in November. She came to me with her sister, Arce. We adopted them to be upstairs houserabbits. Houserabbits which I would have direct contact with for most of the day, as a sort of therapy. And of course, they were also adopted because they needed a new home.
They had been surrendered because the owners were moving house. They were four and a half. That kind of thing breaks my heart. But if they hadn't been cast aside, I would never have had the joy of getting to know Iris. And Iris and Arce, as a unit.
They loved each other deeply. But Iris was clearly dominant, and oftentimes she would be humping her. One of the most common phrases in the house became "Iris, stop humping your sister!" Goodness knows what the neighbours thought if they could hear it. But it wasn't just humping. There were always major grooming sessions. Grooming sessions where both girls would be grooming one another on the back. I even have a video of it somewhere.
Iris was the leader to Arce's follower. Iris was always the one who went somewhere first. She was first on the bed. First to get Fibafirst treats. First to instigate nortiness. She destroyed OH's headphones. She nibbled holes in my duvet covers and bed sheets. She loved eating cardboard - thank goodness she didn't add stasis to her issues with me! She also took chunks out of me several times. One time, she even bit my finger so hard that I ended up with a little nerve damage in it. I will literally carry a mark of her with me at all times as a consequence. She really put my bunnyproofing to the test, continually showing me all the flaws in the system. She even destroyed my handbag!
But Iris wasn't always first to things as she was completely deaf. She needed to be "told" it was dinner time by Arce if she was busy with hay when pellets came out. Sometimes she'd just be fast asleep as a loaf. Noise could make Arce scatter but Iris would just sit there, wondering what the fuss was about. Her notes at the adoption didn't mention her deafness; the only reason I figured it out was adopting Erasmus, my lovely deaf tri lop, from honeybunnies and comparing their behaviour. Being deaf didn't bother her much. She only nipped if she was surprised, like the finger incident.
Like Arce, Iris was a very keen dead bunny flopper. Both girls made a show of it. I do believe that Iris and Arce would have competitions on who could be the best dead bunny flopper in the household. Unfortunately for Iris, Arce definitely had her beat on that front, but only because Arce is such a show off with them!
It took until her last week to introduce fresh to her diet as she had a regular problem with uneaten caecatrophs despite losing weight for a long while. At least that was one issue we cracked. She loved her fresh food right up until a few minutes before she passed. At least she was still comfortable enough to eat until she died.
And like Arce, again, Iris was very much a daddy's girl. She adored him, and he adored her. Every night he'd go to bed and tell them both, that they were "soooooo beautiful" and "such beautiful bunnehs". He's a proper country boy, and seeing him go so soft over rabbits, which he's been brought up to see as pests, makes me go gooey inside. Since he's known me, he's become a proper rabbit person, even if wildies are still "pests but cute pests" to him. He still said goodnight to both girls last night, when we left Iris's body for Arce to say her goodbyes. But she loved playing toy cups with him - he'd give her a toy cup and she'd toss it aside, over and over again. The same with twigs.
The past week, with finishing the Depocillin and trying panacur, she was still slipping. She lost around 400g in two weeks. Her litter training went completely awry. She stopped humping Arce quite so much. Most things she was doing, it was by rote. She barely even investigated the pipe under my bed we added for new enrichment for them.
Throughout all of her treatments, she was her indomitable self. She took things in her stride, except maybe oral meds. She would try and paw those away from her mouth. I think she was one of the rare rabbits where injectibles were so much easier to deal with for her. Even though I was very inexpertly jabbing her with Depocillin, she took it in her stride. She would have her treatment in a separate room, and then take herself back away and return to Arce as if nothing much had happened. Only after digging up at the bed covers first, though. Depocillin helped clear up the, frankly impressive, sneezing, but it was too little too late. My heart is cracked open.
Iris sweetheart, you were so dominant you didn't always see eye to eye with us humans. I hope you had an adequate retirement home with me. I like to think you grew to love me, especially in the end. I wish I could have saved you, but you were getting so frail. I didn't want you to be utterly miserable when you passed. That would have been so, so unfair on you. You deserved only the best. You got me. I hope I was good enough.
You were here for a short period of time. You got delivered such a cruel hand in your last months of life. It's not fair. I hope I added some light to it. After all, you caught my eye and my heart the moment I saw you. Rest easy, beautiful. Your daddy and I will look after Arce, who misses you more than words can say. Go meet my other bridge bunnies, go show them who's boss. They'll love you. This isn't goodbye, just adieu. Until we meet again, lovely. xxx