Memories of bunnies

[a reader of books]

I have this... issue. I was wondering if there are others who deal with this? I've had memory problems in some areas since I got my ME at 13, and I got my first bunnies in my teens after that, so all my memories I have of my bunnies since then, they've been affected by my memory issues. I lost Tom 8 years ago, and while I remember the worst of his health problems, especially at the end of his life, I wouldn't be able to tell you what kind of bunny he was... I don't remember anything about what he was like. I don't remember if he liked being petted, or if he binkied a lot, or what he liked to eat and what he liked to do. I don't remember the kind of relationship we had, or really have any memories of us spending time together. I loved him so much, but I don't remember any of the important things, like the things that made him who he was, and that makes me so sad. Looking at photos helps me remember some things, but not much. It's like that with all the bunnies I've shared my life with since my teens. I just... don't have the memories. I feel awful about it, even though I know it's not something I have any control over. I know it's going to be the same someday with Sophie and Casper, that I won't remember them, and that feels absolutely terrible. I really don't want to forget them, but I know I will, and it just breaks my heart knowing that.

 

[Shimmer]

When I lose a pet, I write a brief summary of who they were on the back of their vaccination card, so it's there if I need to go back. I also save a small fur sample in a little ziplock bag, so I know what colour they really were. Adding a photo would be good, but I never got that far. At least the vacc card has the dates on, so I can trawl through the photos.

 

[joey&boo]

I can understand why not remembering many details of your bunnies lives is upsetting. Do you think there is anything that could help prompt your recall? I often look at my really old threads on here that help me remember all their funny antics - its one of my favourite things about RU :lol: Its a good record - not only for behavioural stuff / their own individual traits but so I can remember when health things happened. i think tributes can capture help alot - I really like Joeys.

Pre RU I used to write a little book, something like this
http://forums.rabbitrehome.org.uk/showthread.php?467317-Ralph-s-story&highlight=ralph . You could maybe have a book now to record the memories you have of Sophie & Casper already, record their favourite things. You've so many lovely stories about their anecdotes on here

 

[MimzMum]

I'm in the same boat really but attributed it to my past cancer therapy and currently my long covid which has all but taken my memory clean away. It's devastating to think I can't even recall what Jenna (dog) was like a few short years ago. Part of it for me is the grief factor, each of our pets is unique and to know we'll not see their like again when they pass is hurtful. I think our minds will try to spare us that hurt by locking away these aspects especially if it forces strong emotions to the surface.

 

[Zoobec]

I don’t have any experience of this so I can’t advise, but I wanted to send some hugs if you would like them.

 

[Pets mum]

I wrote a little story/memoire of both of my bunnies just after I lost them, while my memories of them were still fresh. If I hadn't I wouldn't have remembered a fraction of their lives. It was just for me, and only I've ever read it, but it gives me comfort, so I can appreciate a little of how you feel. I think you've made a lovely lasting memory of Casper and Sophie by having their own thread, and sharing their lives and photos xx

 

[Sky-O]

I really feel for you here. I imagine that adds to the feelings of loss around them.

Could you maybe keep a diary? Maybe just a sentence on each, every day, so one day you’ll have that? Maybe particularly focusing on what they did and what you felt, because it sounds like your autobiographical memory isn’t working great, but your felt experience is still stored, and it may help you trigger the feelings associated with those moments.

I’d also say that you said you can’t remember the important things, but you’ve remembered the key important thing, with us how much you loved him. That love remains in tact (probably because there’s a feeling attached to it).

 

[a reader of books]

When I lose a pet, I write a brief summary of who they were on the back of their vaccination card, so it's there if I need to go back. I also save a small fur sample in a little ziplock bag, so I know what colour they really were. Adding a photo would be good, but I never got that far. At least the vacc card has the dates on, so I can trawl through the photos.

Ooh, that's a good idea. I like the idea of keeping a bit of fur, too. I had a bunny in my teens, Max, and I don't remember what they looked like (or even whether they were a boy or a girl bunny), since I have no photos left of them, so that would've been nice to have, a bit of fur or even a photo.

I can understand why not remembering many details of your bunnies lives is upsetting. Do you think there is anything that could help prompt your recall? I often look at my really old threads on here that help me remember all their funny antics - its one of my favourite things about RU :lol: Its a good record - not only for behavioural stuff / their own individual traits but so I can remember when health things happened. i think tributes can capture help alot - I really like Joeys.

Pre RU I used to write a little book, something like this
http://forums.rabbitrehome.org.uk/showthread.php?467317-Ralph-s-story&highlight=ralph . You could maybe have a book now to record the memories you have of Sophie & Casper already, record their favourite things. You've so many lovely stories about their anecdotes on here

I hadn't thought of how I'll have memories of Sophie and Casper here on the forum to read someday... That's so nice that looking at your old threads to recall your bunnies' funny antics is one of your favourite things about being here, aw. I think you're right that tributes can be a helpful way to remember them. I wish I had them for my past bunnies... I really like Joey's, too.

I love the little book you made for Ralph. What a lovely collection of little stories of him. That's such a sweet way to remember him. I really like your idea of having a book now to record the memories I have of Sophie and Casper already. I can write it all down before I forget and then have a book of memories like you have for Ralph and your other pre-RU bunnies.

I'm in the same boat really but attributed it to my past cancer therapy and currently my long covid which has all but taken my memory clean away. It's devastating to think I can't even recall what Jenna (dog) was like a few short years ago. Part of it for me is the grief factor, each of our pets is unique and to know we'll not see their like again when they pass is hurtful. I think our minds will try to spare us that hurt by locking away these aspects especially if it forces strong emotions to the surface.

I'm really sorry you're in the same boat, MimzMum, because of your own past and current health problems, and that you can't even recall what your dear little Jenna was like a few years ago... That's so sad, I'm so sorry... I can understand how grief factors in for you, how it can be a way of your mind to spare you the hurt... That makes a lot of sense...

 

[a reader of books]

I don’t have any experience of this so I can’t advise, but I wanted to send some hugs if you would like them.

Aw, that's so kind of you, Zoobec. Thank you.

I wrote a little story/memoire of both of my bunnies just after I lost them, while my memories of them were still fresh. If I hadn't I wouldn't have remembered a fraction of their lives. It was just for me, and only I've ever read it, but it gives me comfort, so I can appreciate a little of how you feel. I think you've made a lovely lasting memory of Casper and Sophie by having their own thread, and sharing their lives and photos xx

I'm glad the little story/memoire you wrote of your bunnies give you comfort and has helped you remember them. That sounds like a really good and helpful thing to do, so I'm going to keep that in mind. I'm glad you think I've made a lovely lasting memory of Casper and Sophie with their own thread and sharing things about them here... It'll be really nice to have that of them someday.

I really feel for you here. I imagine that adds to the feelings of loss around them.

Could you maybe keep a diary? Maybe just a sentence on each, every day, so one day you’ll have that? Maybe particularly focusing on what they did and what you felt, because it sounds like your autobiographical memory isn’t working great, but your felt experience is still stored, and it may help you trigger the feelings associated with those moments.

I’d also say that you said you can’t remember the important things, but you’ve remembered the key important thing, with us how much you loved him. That love remains in tact (probably because there’s a feeling attached to it).

Aw, thank you. It does, yeah...

Ooh, a diary... I hadn't heard of autobiographical memory before, but I looked it up, and, yeah, that's exactly what I'm bad at, but I do remember feelings if they were strong, yes. I think I'd really like that, writing something short each day about what they did and how I felt, keeping a little diary about them that I can read back later.

Oh, you're right... I do remember how much I loved him. I hadn't thought of it that way, that that's maybe the most important thing to remember...

 

[a reader of books]

Thank you so much for your thoughtful replies, everyone. I really appreciate them.

 

[joey&boo]

thank you for your kind words too. Really pleased you sound a bit more hopeful. Your lovely photographs really do seem to tell a story . maybe if you add more dialogue that will help with your memories too? Sometimes Eddy or Boo does something super cute & I'll think about sharing it on here...I used to all the time but don't bother. I often think Were my trio really that adorable & so much fun (of course!) but maybe I think that more because I posted about them more. And you've more memories yet to make

 

[a reader of books]

thank you for your kind words too. Really pleased you sound a bit more hopeful. Your lovely photographs really do seem to tell a story . maybe if you add more dialogue that will help with your memories too? Sometimes Eddy or Boo does something super cute & I'll think about sharing it on here...I used to all the time but don't bother. I often think Were my trio really that adorable & so much fun (of course!) but maybe I think that more because I posted about them more. And you've more memories yet to make

I am feeling a bit more hopeful. I hadn't thought of writing down the memories I have now, and writing down something each day, and of how I've already started recording memories of them here on RU, too. Adding more text to their photos would help, I think, yes. That's a good idea. Also, I'd love to hear about Boo and Eddy's cute moments. Boo is my favourite forum bunny, and it'd be really nice to get to know Eddy better. But only if you feel like posting, of course. Maybe you'd like to read it someday, like you enjoy reading your old threads now?

 

[joey&boo]

I am feeling a bit more hopeful. I hadn't thought of writing down the memories I have now, and writing down something each day, and of how I've already started recording memories of them here on RU, too. Adding more text to their photos would help, I think, yes. That's a good idea. Also, I'd love to hear about Boo and Eddy's cute moments. Boo is my favourite forum bunny, and it'd be really nice to get to know Eddy better. But only if you feel like posting, of course. Maybe you'd like to read it someday, like you enjoy reading your old threads now?

Oh wow, thats so lovely Boo is your fave forum bunny She was a HUGE personality til she went blind but she's always been really loving. I'm glad you liked Joeys tribute too. I will for sure start sharing more anecdotes .

Since you posted this thread i've been reflecting on the theme a lot. My memory of my rabbits over the years is so variable, like i could write a book on some, a postcard on others. Wondering if this relates to how busy or not I was at the time, how bonded I was to the bunny, how big the bunnies personality was? Linked to what we were saying the other day about remembering conversations, I think this is why I remember from Noodle onwards much better, because I talk rabbits & rabbit memories to Bob all the time

 

[a reader of books]

Oh wow, thats so lovely Boo is your fave forum bunny She was a HUGE personality til she went blind but she's always been really loving. I'm glad you liked Joeys tribute too. I will for sure start sharing more anecdotes .

Since you posted this thread i've been reflecting on the theme a lot. My memory of my rabbits over the years is so variable, like i could write a book on some, a postcard on others. Wondering if this relates to how busy or not I was at the time, how bonded I was to the bunny, how big the bunnies personality was? Linked to what we were saying the other day about remembering conversations, I think this is why I remember from Noodle onwards much better, because I talk rabbits & rabbit memories to Bob all the time

She does always sound and look so lovely and adorable. Has she changed a lot, then, since she went blind? I'm glad you'll start sharing more anectdotes, yay.

Ah, yes, I suppose a lot of different things can influence how much we remember about our bunnies, like the things you mention... What you said about remembering from Noodle onwards much better because you talk about rabbits and your memories of them to Bob a lot makes sense to me, because I remember a lot of things Sophie and Casper did because I remember telling my best friend about them. I always tell them when Sophie and Casper do something cute or funny. :lol:

 

[joey&boo]

She does always sound and look so lovely and adorable. Has she changed a lot, then, since she went blind? I'm glad you'll start sharing more anectdotes, yay.

Ah, yes, I suppose a lot of different things can influence how much we remember about our bunnies, like the things you mention... What you said about remembering from Noodle onwards much better because you talk about rabbits and your memories of them to Bob a lot makes sense to me, because I remember a lot of things Sophie and Casper did because I remember telling my best friend about them. I always tell them when Sophie and Casper do something cute or funny. :lol:

I'm happy to hear you've a good friend to relate all your bunny cuteness to

Boo's behaviour has changed. TBH I think its mainly her blindness but her arthritis too. she has never run at speed since going blind & only done the one binky. That said the core of her personality is there, she is still a brave bunny, unphased by anything & knows how to get what she wants. Its all very toned down these days.

When we were looking for a friend for Joey after Noodle died we had a hard time finding a single female. Boo (then named Pippa) was the only one - & she was a 90 mins drive away. I remember chatting through her qualities & thinking her personality sounded perfect but i was really disappointed she was a REW & a lop. She taught me the beauty of white buns.

Her first meeting with Joey was hilarious. We put them in a bonding pen at the fosterers to see initial impressions. Boo saw him, binkied straight away & then threw herself in to a flop, up again & they had a couple of good natured circuits chasing round the pen. Then it all got too much for Joey who hid behind my legs :lol:

 

[a reader of books]

I'm happy to hear you've a good friend to relate all your bunny cuteness to

Boo's behaviour has changed. TBH I think its mainly her blindness but her arthritis too. she has never run at speed since going blind & only done the one binky. That said the core of her personality is there, she is still a brave bunny, unphased by anything & knows how to get what she wants. Its all very toned down these days.

When we were looking for a friend for Joey after Noodle died we had a hard time finding a single female. Boo (then named Pippa) was the only one - & she was a 90 mins drive away. I remember chatting through her qualities & thinking her personality sounded perfect but i was really disappointed she was a REW & a lop. She taught me the beauty of white buns.

Her first meeting with Joey was hilarious. We put them in a bonding pen at the fosterers to see initial impressions. Boo saw him, binkied straight away & then threw herself in to a flop, up again & they had a couple of good natured circuits chasing round the pen. Then it all got too much for Joey who hid behind my legs :lol:

Aw, thank you.

Ah, I can understand why she's unwilling to run at speed since going blind, and with her arthritis, too... But only one binky since then, aw. She always seems like a happy, content bunny, though, even without the binkies. I'm glad to hear the core of her personality is still there, that she's still her brave, unphased self who knows how to get what she wants, even though it's very toned down now.

That's really lovely that she taught you the beauty of white buns. After I adopted Sophie, I started finding white bunnies so beautiful, too, especially ones with nose smudges. It sounds like you were lucky to have a hard time finding a single girl for Joey, since it led you to adopt Boo!

Boo and Joey's first meeting sounds so funny. :lol: Sounds like Boo was pretty happy! Poor Joey, though, finding her a bit too enthusiastic. :lol: