Agree with everyone else, especially Lilbun and Fruitandnutcake :thumb: I had PND, I knew it AND saw my GP several times - which was fantastic. You need to find a nice female GP, preferrably one who has had kids too. Mine was fantastic. Did the PND Edinburgh depression score each time I went and discussed things I could do to make things easier - to be honest just talking to her helped immensely as did bursting in to tears and telling a professional how I was really feeling - very therapeutic. Despite the no. of times I cried with my incredibly supportive husband and family, this was different. I decided I didn't want antidepressants at first and managed ok without them, got back on track for a while, but then dipped again when my little one was about 6 months old. I'm on antidepressants now (specific ones for PND) and I can not tell you how much better I felt, almost instantly, like my old self again - I do not know why I put off treatment for so long! I wish I had taken them sooner. I was also offered counselling but am actually fine without that as I have a very good support network at home.
You don't have to be crying to have PND, but what you describe reminds me of how I felt - just bite the bullet and go and see someone. Having a baby is flipping hardwork, until you have a newborn you just don't realise, but even more so having a newborn who cries a lot. My son had colic from birth and it didn't disappear at 12 wks like it is supposed to. It wasn't until he started solids to slow down his gut and bulk it up that things got better - we weaned him very early indeed and it made all the difference. Unless you have a screaming colicky baby you just can't appreciate the exhausting, helplessness, it really is horrific.
That said, babies cry for all sorts of reasons but they are unable to differentiate at this age between complex emotions - it is very primitive. I hurt, I have fear, I am tired, I am hungry and that is about it. The brain that deals with complex emotion is not fully formed until they are 3 yrs of age atleast. I am telling you this because it is important to understand that your child is crying for a very good reason and that she needs you. She is not trying to train you or manipulate you - she does not have the brain yet to do so, it is basic infant need. However, when we, as mothers, are feeling anxious, upset, depressed etc it is very hard for us to meet these needs. Babies rely on us totally to regulate their emotions for them, this is how they learn to do it for themselves. If you can't regulate your own, let alone hers, then she is going to be all over the place if you like and feeling uncontained/insecure. This is why it is really important you get help for you first
I have a strong feeling that if you do this, and I mean this holistically - see if you can get family/friends to give you some extra support - practical and emotional, you will feel more together and then so will your beautiful baby, and I suspect she will cry less as a result.
I can promise you it DOES get easier. I never thought those early weeks/months would end - it was like an impossible mountain to climb that never ended. My little boy is 16 months old today and although extremely demanding in every sense I cope so well now, I am me again, and life it so much easier, he walks, entertains himself, plays on his own etc, there are no more bottles/boobs/baby food etc.... it all changes I promise. For the first few months of his life I hardly ever saw my bunnies (and they are houserabbits!). My husband took over their care totally. Then, when I felt like it and had the energy, I would go and be with them, clean them out, spend time fussing over their hutch/toys etc like i used to and it was really nice, a treat. As things got easier with the baby I would spend more and more time looking after them again and eventually learnt to timetable it into the day - whenever there was opportunity. I now pretty much look after Poppy and our boy, my husband helps or does it when I can't find time. When you have a difficult baby it is just more than you can cope with, and rightly so, you need to focus your energy on you and your little one. I think that boarding or fostering is an excellent idea, just until you find your feet - and you will, I promise, it does get easier. Hugs xx