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Bonding a disaster - I've been bitten. What shall I do?

R

Rox

Young Bun
Evening all,
I came home with a 9 week baby rabbit today, I fell in love with him and against my better judgement I've brought him home to try and bond with my 18month old neutered doe. I've been told in the past by an expert in bonding that one fussy doe she had would only be paired with a baby and I guess I thought i'd have a go at it.
I wasn't organised, have gone about it all wrong and tried bonding them in her room. It started off well and she sniffed him lots, I even thought there was licking and snuggling but I guess not (although she looked a bit scared of him to begin with). Then after lots of sniffing she went to scratch his ear and grunted at him. I think she must have made her feelings clear as the new boy stamped his foot a couple of times.
Anyway, I tried to get them to meet eachother a few times but she seemed to want to go for him and did try and attack him, I pulled her off him and then she bit me, nastily on the hand (does this need a jab?!) and then chased me off too. Although she's fiesty she never bites.
I've fallen in love with the new boy but is it a hopeless cause?
I'm having a shed delivered tomorrow and I know I should have waited and bonded them on neutral ground but I got carried away.
I guess new boy should go back or is it quite normal to have a little bit of a scuffle? He's only small so I won't let her go near him unless i'm holding them both firmly.
Any advice from the bonding experts?!
I'm sitting in the room now and maisy (the doe) isn't herself, shes obviously very interested in the new boy and is now circling him (he is currently in a large pet carrier, not ideal I know but I will either buy a new cage tomorrow or take him back:(:() She also just jumped on top of the pet carrier, I guess shes saying she is top dog?
Maisy has her own cage and the two will not be left alone unsupervised and will be in own cages at night.
Thanks guys, any help greatly received. I desperately want maisy to have a friend but perhaps this adorable little guy doesn't do it for her?
:(
 
Hi :wave:

I don't think they are a lost cause but your next attempt needs to be on neutral territory definitely.

If you PM me your e-mail address, I'll send you some info.

Erin. c
 
Oh dear that did go badly :(

Luckily it doesn't sound like either bun was hurt. Just you, I would check you are up to date with your Tetanus.

I would keep them is separate rooms.

Bonding MUST be done on neutral ground.

I think it is usually better to wait until both buns are neutered before trying to bond - this would mean keeping him apart until he is at least 12 weeks and then another few weeks for healing and hormones to die down.

I would keep a close eye to ensure that neither is so stressed by todays events that they stop eating or pooing.

I would see if there is someone near you who could help with bonding at a later date - post whereabouts you are.

Sorry I've just seen you are in Swansea!
 
I know, I listened to the lady in the shop who said they will either get on or not. I think i'd better return him and get a rescue rabbit later on or try on neutral territory later on. I wanted to get a different breed as Maisy is alionhead but only a lion head male available to adopt in the area. From what i've seen on here some rabbits just won't bond. Will the always fight? I am head over heels with him!
 
I think it's safe to say she will always fight if you put another rabbit in her territory -she's defending it.
 
mine faught the first time.....they are now together
follow everything by the book this time and it should work. :)
try not to be impatient........good things come to those who wait! :lol:
do your research in the meantime and hopefully in a few months you'll have a bonded pair.
dont give him up just have patience. :)
 
I know, it's going to be a long slog. I would strugle to part with him as he is adorable but i'm worried they will never get on or that I haven't got the time to spend to do it properly. I'm swotting up more on bonding and hope that the neutral ground will work (playhouse arrives tomorrow). Otherwise it may make more sense to take the poor mite back (he is adorable and will get snpped up in no time) and then wait for a suitable rescue to come up in the area and leave the bonding to the expert who has the knowledge and time to do it (I have a 9month old baby boy). Oh, what to do, I shouldn't have been so impulsive or fallen in love with the little buck. I was hoping for a miracle and for them to get on and went about it all wrong! :oops:
 
I think a rescue will bond them for you even if your rabbits arent from there.. could be wrong though.
 
I get a feeling this will work- not sure why. I think the way you have described it seems there is a chance, it does need neutral ground and i don't think it would hurt to have them side by side in cages for awhile. so they can grow to love each other. Mine are all great together because they see each other all the time and hear each other, so they develop that bond through the bars. Not so hard then when you put them together. If she has been the only bun, may have been a shock to her to have a bun around let alone with her.
 
I agree, it all sounds perfectly normal to me, I'd expect any doe to behave like that on her own territory. You could try 100 rabbits in that way and she'd probably do the same to all of them. There's absolutely no way you can infer from what has happened that they are never going to get on, and it sounds to me as if it wasn't outright aggression she showed even on her territory so it may well work if done in the right way. Personally I'm not a fan of having buns next to each other between the bars before bonding, I worry that it stands as much chance of winding them up than it does of helping, and they behave so differently on neutral territory anyway that I don't see the point...but others disagree so I think it's one of those things that's not a definite no-no but equally not a definite must.

Bonding, however, absolutely must be done on neutral territory, and one of the worst things you can do is to separate them again overnight and put them back together during the day. This will just confuse them and make them go straight back to 'square one' each time. For the first few days they really need to be indoors and somewhere you can keep a close eye on them all the time - make a temporary pen in the kitchen for example. Smaller is actually better when bonding. Chasing, humping and fur pulling is all normal, but you may need to intervene if it gets extreme or they start to 'circle' each other with head to bum as that can often result in a fight. If these things happen it doesn't mean it's doomed to fail, it may just mean that you may need to intervene a lot for the first day while they settle down.

I would also wait until he is a bit older and neutered before trying to bond them, an unneutered male is likely to be very frisky and wind her up as soon as his hormones 'kick in', and if he humps her head as they often do, he stands a good chance of having his bits bitten - a very painful and serious injury! Much less likely to happen after he's neutered :)

There's lots of good advice on bonding around this forum, and Janice-arc is one of the resident experts so if you see any advice by her I would suggest listening to it :)
 
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Yes, thats true - i think they will bond them for you. Maybe worth a shot.
To be honest, I really have only briefly tried bonding them. I've not given it a chance, it could well work. No wonder it didn't as I put him into her room :oops:. I just know that people often don't want to buy older bunnies and I haven't got the resouces to keep them seperate and there is no way I could take him back if I looked him another day! I hope I don't sound shallow for considering taking him back, he's only a little thing and i'm worried that he will get hurt due to my inexperience. I'm trying to think what is best to do for the two of the bunnies.
I fell in love, had a good feeling about the new bun and then when it didn't go perfect first time I panicked. I'm trying to think whats best for my bun and the little un. If i keep them both and they dont get on then they have less free timeout of cage and possible fights when I try hopelessly to bonding them. The baby bun will get snapped up if I do decide its best to return him, he's only been in the store for the week and as we all know, sadly more people buy babies than older buns.
I feel the right thing to do in this circumstance is take him back for him to find a home where he can have plenty of love and free time without the stress of being bonded with maisy but whether my heart will let me I don't know! What to do!!!!!! Think I will ring up about bonding them tomorrow ina rescue centre and see what they say.... thanks guys! Any further advice welcome and hope you don't think I'm as stupid and as fickle as i'm sounding :oops::oops:
 
you're just trying to make the right decision, I know, but after the stress of bonding he will love having another bun for company. you have to do what feels right for you and what you're most comfortable with, but I wouldn't take him back, you sound like you have a good chance here :)
 
Santa said:
I agree, it all sounds perfectly normal to me, I'd expect any doe to behave like that on her own territory. You could try 100 rabbits in that way and she'd probably do the same to all of them. There's absolutely no way you can infer from what has happened that they are never going to get on, and it sounds to me as if it wasn't outright aggression she showed even on her territory so it may well work if done in the right way. Personally I'm not a fan of having buns next to each other between the bars before bonding, I worry that it stands as much chance of winding them up than it does of helping, and they behave so differently on neutral territory anyway that I don't see the point...but others disagree so I think it's one of those things that's not a definite no-no but equally not a definite must.

Bonding, however, absolutely must be done on neutral territory, and one of the worst things you can do is to separate them again overnight and put them back together during the day. This will just confuse them and make them go straight back to 'square one' each time. For the first few days they really need to be indoors and somewhere you can keep a close eye on them all the time - make a temporary pen in the kitchen for example. Smaller is actually better when bonding. Chasing, humping and fur pulling is all normal, but you may need to intervene if it gets extreme or they start to 'circle' each other with head to bum as that can often result in a fight. If these things happen it doesn't mean it's doomed to fail, it may just mean that you may need to intervene a lot for the first day while they settle down.

I would also wait until he is a bit older and neutered before trying to bond them, an unneutered male is likely to be very frisky and wind her up as soon as his hormones 'kick in', and if he humps her head as they often do, he stands a good chance of having his bits bitten - a very painful and serious injury! Much less likely to happen after he's neutered :)

There's lots of good advice on bonding around this forum, and Janice-arc is one of the resident experts so if you see any advice by her I would suggest listening to it :)
Click to expand...

Thanks santa - you've made me think perhaps there is hope! :) I'm being reprimanded by maisy i think, shes sitting on my shoulders to tell me whos boss!
 
NicolaTervit said:
you're just trying to make the right decision, I know, but after the stress of bonding he will love having another bun for company. you have to do what feels right for you and what you're most comfortable with, but I wouldn't take him back, you sound like you have a good chance here :)
Click to expand...

Thanks, Nicola. Everyone is being very kind and encouraging and given me hope. I'm just trying to think what is realistic with a 9month old baby plus I would have to wait until he is neutered. I have to have a long think about what to do but everyone's advice and opinions are really helpful. If i persevere and it pays off great, if not then the two rabbits won't have so much free time and be potentially lonely as i won't have resources (or the confidence!) to find another bond for them. although that said, I know I haven't given it a chance and they could be great together. I can't help but think that i'd be better off finding her a husbun now in a rescue (there is one lionhead available for doption but I didn't want to put two lion heads togther as they can be fiesty apparently, she says with plaster on finger!) that we can see in real-time if shes likey to get on or not.
Lots of thinking to do tonight!
 
If he is neutered and you rebond on neutral territory there's every chance they will make a couple.

When ours fell out I got a couple of nasty bites when I spilt up their fights. They have since rebonded and are very happy.

I think your main problem is keeping them separate until he is neutered, recovered, and ready to bond.

What's your current hutch/cage situation? Could he live in her hutch after she has moved into the shed? You would have to thoroughly clean the shed later though, so they could both live in it after bonding elsewhere.
 
If he is neutered and you rebond on neutral territory there's every chance they will make a couple.

When ours fell out I got a couple of nasty bites when I spilt up their fights. They have since rebonded and are very happy.

I think your main problem is keeping them separate until he is neutered, recovered, and ready to bond.

What's your current hutch/cage situation? Could he live in her hutch after she has moved into the shed? You would have to thoroughly clean the shed later though, so they could both live in it after bonding elsewhere.
 
tintin said:
If he is neutered and you rebond on neutral territory there's every chance they will make a couple.

When ours fell out I got a couple of nasty bites when I spilt up their fights. They have since rebonded and are very happy.

I think your main problem is keeping them separate until he is neutered, recovered, and ready to bond.

What's your current hutch/cage situation? Could he live in her hutch after she has moved into the shed? You would have to thoroughly clean the shed later though, so they could both live in it after bonding elsewhere.
Click to expand...


Thanks for the advice. I'm sorry you were bitten too, its not nice is it! She evenchased after me to try and have another go! Maisy currently has the dining room-to-be with a hutch in it. She has supervised and unsupervised time in the room. Shed is arriving tomorrow but no telling when it will get assembled! Only prob would be that then I would have to make the shed un-neutral plus I was thinking of putting her cage in as she uses it as a big litter box! Would it not be acceptable for them to bond in the shed, if it's new to them both?
 
I would wait till he is neutered - afer that i suspect it will go wonderfully! It is rare that a neutered male/female relationship does not bond:D:D
 
parsnipbun said:
I would wait till he is neutered - afer that i suspect it will go wonderfully! It is rare that a neutered male/female relationship does not bond:D:D
Click to expand...

Thanks Parsnipbun! And thanks to all! I'm off to get some rest now. Thanks for all your advice and hope you all have a good nights rest! :)
 
Hi everyone, a quick update for those who offered their advice yesterday.
After a sleepless night and a sad morning I decided the only decision was to take the young bun back to the shop as it seemed to be the fairest option for all (it wasn't easy) :( I was very upset but there is simply isn't any where for me to keep them seperate and I don't have the time the little chap deserves to help him settle in.
It's so sad, he was the friendliest buck and with time it may have worked out but time simply isn't on my side just now.
I'm assured that he will find a loving home, it's sad I couldn't manage a way to segregate them but the house is to capacity at the moment and then there's the time issue, while they both need to be seen to seperately they wouldn't have much attention or free timeout of the cage. Must not let heart rule my head and jump into these things.
Back to the original plan of a rescue bun when I've a shed set-up and think i'll be out-sourcing the bonding if it's not going to plan on neutral ground, it's not for the feint-hearted :(
Thank you all for the tips and advice xx
 
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