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Thread: Henry at vets again - Henry has sadly gone- U/D 6am thread page 20

  1. #231
    Mama Doe mikek's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Craig 1965 View Post
    I would like to say how touched and blessed I am to be part of this forum and know you all through the posts. Iíve followed all your journeys and likewise you have kindly followed mine.
    From the bottom of my heart I want to thank you all deeply even though you have not met me or my rabbits, you have shared your stories, wisdom, advice and vibes and kindness.
    I am completely broken by the loss of Henry. Itís been 12 hours exactly and I havenít stopped crying. I have been at work but I just sat on my office and sobbed uncontrollably. And as I type this, I am still sobbing. It is a pain like no other. As bunny buddy kindly said above - it is a crushing feeling.
    I draw comfort from your kind supportive words and Jane, your tribute image is simply beautiful. Henry would approve. Each time I look at it I break out into more tears.
    Iíve not eaten today, I last slept on Wednesday night and I am hopelessly lost now. I somehow have to try and pick up pieces and find a path to move on. I donít understand life and death and I donít understand why our beautiful pets leave us and I am empty.
    We will make sure we focus on Lillian - she too is understandably sad and she was smelling the blanket I lay with Henry on earlier.
    I am not sure how I move on or when. But I would appreciate your guidance when I do.
    Thank you all for being so very special and following and remembering Henry. He was a very special soul who left our lives way too early and I do not know why.
    Hi Craig,
    in my experience it can take a very long time for the pain to fade but that can also bring feelings of guilt/disloyalty - like feeling bad for not grieving so much.
    when the time comes - be it sooner or later, one thing that can help is giving another bun that is in need a good home and imo buns need company and although (ime) bonding can be difficult Lillian may need to have some bunny company. The only downside to this is that it creates a never-ending cycle of keeping bunnies.
    when the worst happens here I am devastated and I came to the point where I wondered if all the heartache worth it but eventually came to the conclusion that while there are still bunnies in need then I would carry on. also the house and garden don't seem worth having without buns - even though the garden has to have chicken wire everywhere to stop them destroying things.

    I used think it must be worse for dog owners when their much loved companion passes away. the dog/owner on the surface seems much more that rabbit/owner, but now I think rabbits occupy a very different & very special place in our hearts and I think the sense of loss might be a lot greater.
    You have been in my thoughts all day.
    (\__/)
    (='.'=)
    (")_(")

    if you're reading this it's too late

  2. #232
    Forum Buddy Craig 1965's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mikek View Post
    Hi Craig,
    in my experience it can take a very long time for the pain to fade but that can also bring feelings of guilt/disloyalty - like feeling bad for not grieving so much.
    when the time comes - be it sooner or later, one thing that can help is giving another bun that is in need a good home and imo buns need company and although (ime) bonding can be difficult Lillian may need to have some bunny company. The only downside to this is that it creates a never-ending cycle of keeping bunnies.
    when the worst happens here I am devastated and I came to the point where I wondered if all the heartache worth it but eventually came to the conclusion that while there are still bunnies in need then I would carry on. also the house and garden don't seem worth having without buns - even though the garden has to have chicken wire everywhere to stop them destroying things.

    I used think it must be worse for dog owners when their much loved companion passes away. the dog/owner on the surface seems much more that rabbit/owner, but now I think rabbits occupy a very different & very special place in our hearts and I think the sense of loss might be a lot greater.
    You have been in my thoughts all day.
    Mike - thank you. I wish I could individually thank everyone because everyone deserves my personal recognition.
    Mike - despite the grife I find myself in, and between the tissues and the sobbing, my thoughts turn to Lillian. One one hand, I am extremely fearful for her health because she has this history of urine infections - due largely to her weight. We have been making extensive and conscious efforts to reduce her limitations to pellets and we cut out 90% of those. She is now on special diatry pellets along with greens and herbs - all fresh. And of course hay. But she's not a hay fan.
    Your point about 'moving on' is something I know I must do, and I also know as you rightly say, that leaving Lillian as a solo bun is not really, in my opinion, in her best interests. She, like most rabbits, feel safer and are more comfortable in pairs or larger. Lillian relied extensively on Henry for her emotional support. In my view, Lillian has emotional issues in so far as her previous owner. We've tried hard to convice Lillian that we are safe and she won't come to harm with us, but she is still very wary of us and so she is not a socialising rabbit with hoomans. That is why Henry was so pivotal to Lillians mental wellbeing.
    It is fair to say that I do look on rabbit adoption sites and follow some wonderful facebook sites with amazing dedicated people who help rescue rabbits. I am in awe of the work they do, and I find myself weeping at the stories that I read about how rabbits end up in these rescue places. And that is exactly why I feel drawn to adopting rescue rabbits because I know we can provide that forever home they deserve. Nice garden, plenty of grass, space to run, a warm home, security and to give them that 'family' they need.
    As you correctly say, in doing so, you can become wrapped in an endless cycle of two, one, two, one and so on. In my mind, you either accept the combinations and accept as you say, that you have to move on and find a new bun partner, or you risk alienating the solo bun. I am with you on that and the house is empty without little Henry zooming round, poking his nose in places, shoving us out of the way. And in my heart I deeply miss that.
    My wife, however, is of the current opinion that we hold back - just for a while. Not rush into things. It's not that she doesn't care. Quite the opposite. She is different to me, as I am to her. I am emotionally weak, she is emotionally strong. It's an interesting reversal.
    Re-bonding Lillian is not going to be an easy step as there is no neutral space left here. So it will be tricky to say the least - when I am ready to move on.
    I particularly like your end paragraph - it is extremely heartfelt and personal and touching. For those of us who give our hearts to help support and home rabbits, we generate a special bond that only those who share that passion understand. They are incredibly complex little animals, often overlooked, all to frequently abandoned and above all, rabbits have very special souls. They form a bond with their human guardians that runs as deep as any family does. And that is why the grief is so so painful.
    I have lost relatives, some close. I have lost friends. I have never found myself shedding any tear at any funeral - and whilst that may sound harsh, I usually contain what emotions I have. But the loss of Henry has completely shattered me. I still deeply grieve for my bridge bun Ben, above all my other rabbits who are at the bridge. Ben left a hole that can never be filled. But losing Henry has ripped my life apart. He had so much life to live, so much love to give and that is gone. Lillian's world is an empty world now and my heart is broken beyond what I thought it could be.
    Bless you Mike - I am truly grateful for your thoughts and support.
    Craig
    IF YOU NEED HELP WITH ANYTHING PLEASE SEND ME A PM OR ANY OF THE OTHER FORUM BUDDIES

  3. #233
    Forum Buddy mini lop1's Avatar
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    So sorry to hear you lost Henry, Binky free

  4. #234

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    So sorry to hear dear little Henry had to leave you, you did everything you could.
    Every Bun deserves some love, no matter what their breed, colour or background

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