I'm here for you to listen & follow your thread, bonding is a scary business & we need loads of support, right? I doubt I'll have any sensible advice for you though
Your bunnies are lovely. Your description of Jess sounded like my Boo & they have a similar fluffball appearance too. I've had Boo in a few bonding situations & she really is a strange fish. I think the flightyness of REW's can lead to more explosive episodes, they'll catch on slower I reckon & so scare easily & leap into defensive mode. But with Jess it sounds like it was more instant reaction?
Bunny tornados scare the bejesus out of me. Years before I was on the internet my 2 bridge buns Ralph & Kitty did this. All I can remember is I was scared but it must have worked out fine as they bonded (my only bond prior to this was a love at first sight bond) -this was in the 1990's. I mention it because it was a scary start & an ultimate success.
More recently (Feb 2019) I adopted a 4th bunny with the intention of bonding him in to a trio. My new boy & existing boy launched in to a tornado while I was taking the girls back to their room (there was a bad vibe). My OH was with them but sat very close - he still couldn't get to them in time & Rudey got a nasty tear to his side that needed urgent vet attention & gluing. This was not instantly obvious on first check so please re-examine them just to be sure. From what I can gather tornadoes involve both bunnies latching on so that can have implications.
You mention your boy bun is thin & getting treatment for an eye problem. I'd maybe not even try again til the New Year, get some weight on him & get his confidence up
Many people stay out of the pen, I sit in it & stroke & calm my bunnies. We stopped calling it bonding & started calling it intercepting. I just needed to be within arms reach cos they move so bloody fast . In my opinion this would be appropriate for your two xx
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