How breaking bonds works

This might be a really stupid question.

But I know obviously when going to a vets etc you take a bonded pair together because being apart for even an hour or so (so I’ve read) can break a bond.

So if my boys have both the kitchen/diner which has their nighttime pen in, and now the living room, and one spends time alone in the pen a few hours and the other in the living room, by choice.....isn’t that the same thing and could cause a break down?

Is that just paranoid talk and the two are totally different scenarios?

Thank you x


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Idk because Iv only had my buns a few weeks but if your talking about by choice then could it not be different as they have decided for themselves rather then being separated by us? Just speculating
My buns are often apart for long periods as Harlequin likes to run off energy in the hallway then relax out there for ages and both seem fine.

Lisa1981 said:

Idk because Iv only had my buns a few weeks but if your talking about by choice then could it not be different as they have decided for themselves rather then being separated by us? Just speculating
My buns are often apart for long periods as Harlequin likes to run off energy in the hallway then relax out there for ages.

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Yeah see that’s exactly what I’m wondering too, if the choice makes a difference.

It’s coming from our pair that’s been bonded (again) since beginning of December and now they have all of downstairs after slow expansion over a month or so, but they often chose to spend time apart for a few hours but then sometimes Luther just gets funny and tries to keep nipping Truffle in the face or circling can happen.
Today has been particularly bad and I’ve had to intervene 4 times so far. But now they are snuggling again!!

I’m just so tired of being on edge all the time and just want them to just deal with the fact they love each other.
Thank you for your reply


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I don't see it as the same. IME securely bonded rabbits cope well being reunited after time apart. I know its possible for illness & vet visits & referred aggression etc to upset relationship dynamics but I've never experienced it. It is not unusual for Boo to sleep under our bed most of the night & nobun raises any eyebrow when she rejoins the others. Many bunnies take time out / away from eacj other. I honestly wouldn't worry x

My buns have four separate areas they can choose to be in. Sometimes they'll choose to be as far from each other as possible It's definitely not the same: going to the vets they'll smell different so it's more risky in a new or unsure bond, but in the same environment they're fine

Truffpuff said:

Yeah see that’s exactly what I’m wondering too, if the choice makes a difference.

It’s coming from our pair that’s been bonded (again) since beginning of December and now they have all of downstairs after slow expansion over a month or so, but they often chose to spend time apart for a few hours but then sometimes Luther just gets funny and tries to keep nipping Truffle in the face or circling can happen.
Today has been particularly bad and I’ve had to intervene 4 times so far. But now they are snuggling again!!

I’m just so tired of being on edge all the time and just want them to just deal with the fact they love each other.
Thank you for your reply


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It still sounds like early days (again). I often worry over things regarding behaviour to one another because my 2 have not been together long but I think some times you just have to let them take their own time over it. I often have to find myself some thing mentally absorbing to stop myself worrying then hours/days later I realise it wasn’t to much of an issue.
Our buns like to keep us on our toes I think

joey&boo said:

I don't see it as the same. IME securely bonded rabbits cope well being reunited after time apart. I know its possible for illness & vet visits & referred aggression etc to upset relationship dynamics but I've never experienced it. It is not unusual for Boo to sleep under our bed most of the night & nobun raises any eyebrow when she rejoins the others. Many bunnies take time out / away from eacj other. I honestly wouldn't worry x

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keletkezes said:

My buns have four separate areas they can choose to be in. Sometimes they'll choose to be as far from each other as possible It's definitely not the same: going to the vets they'll smell different so it's more risky in a new or unsure bond, but in the same environment they're fine

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Thanks guys I really appreciate your replies.

I think I was kind of hoping it might be that because otherwise it makes me worry more why Luther keeps randomly deciding to be mean to Truffle, either nipping his face or butt, sometimes initiating circling.

I’ve been doing what the bonders advised me to do when these occasions happen, but I’m constantly worried sick because I’m terrified the bond could break down at any moment like before.....I know I overreact I just can’t help it because I can’t go back again. And it frustrates me that it’s so random I can’t change anything to make him stop.

Is it normal for these behaviours to still happen after bonding but will phase out?

Sorry to be such a worry wart x


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Lisa1981 said:

It still sounds like early days (again). I often worry over things regarding behaviour to one another because my 2 have not been together long but I think some times you just have to let them take their own time over it. I often have to find myself some thing mentally absorbing to stop myself worrying then hours/days later I realise it wasn’t to much of an issue.
Our buns like to keep us on our toes I think

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That’s what I was afraid of. I can’t help panicking or thinking the worst because I’ve never had two rabbits before or bonded, it broke down once after 8 months so I’m such a paranoid bun mum now!

Yeah your totally right. I’ve been trying to do my foe flower wedding display flowers to keep me busy but keep an eye on them. They seem fine again but I just feel on edge all the time.
They certainly do! I’ve asked if they can give it a break for now haha!

I hope your bond continues to go well x


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Spoke to soon, they were fine for like 50 mins cuddling then grooming. Suddenly Luther lost it and chased Truffle and nipped his butt.

So I’ve herded both into their pen for a time out.

Maybe we need to go back to just the kitchen/diner and living room was too much too fast, only two or three days after the space expansion before.


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Bunny relationships remind me of people relationships - some live in each others pockets, forever snuggling, some argue like crazy then make up with similar passion, some seem more like friends, some are decidely psychotic. Its hard enough to read our own species minds never mind bunnies. That said it sounds like your instinct is to reduce their space back til they are settled for a longer time. I'd follow your gut.

IME (Boo being my bossy rabbit) her behaviour has calmed over time but not changed.

Truffpuff said:

That’s what I was afraid of. I can’t help panicking or thinking the worst because I’ve never had two rabbits before or bonded, it broke down once after 8 months so I’m such a paranoid bun mum now!

Yeah your totally right. I’ve been trying to do my foe flower wedding display flowers to keep me busy but keep an eye on them. They seem fine again but I just feel on edge all the time.
They certainly do! I’ve asked if they can give it a break for now haha!

I hope your bond continues to go well x


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I know how you feel I’m naturally a panicky person but some times they can feel what we are feeling as well so some of it could be that. I often sit by the hutch doing cross stich so I can hear but am totally emerged in boring monotonous concentration just to stop me feeling negative.
This is just a though so any one correct me if I’m wrong.

I hope things start to be on the up for your boys bonding and your piece of mind to x

Truffpuff said:

Spoke to soon, they were fine for like 50 mins cuddling then grooming. Suddenly Luther lost it and chased Truffle and nipped his butt.

So I’ve herded both into their pen for a time out.

Maybe we need to go back to just the kitchen/diner and living room was too much too fast, only two or three days after the space expansion before.


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Deep breaths and do what your gut is telling you. If you think it was to fast then reduce the space again and give it longer.

I won’t be allowing my buns in the living room for a few more weeks ( although they have the run of the hall ) as I have to bun prof it which had to be left till after Xmas. No idea if that’s going to mess things up but it couldn’t be helped.

joey&boo said:

Bunny relationships remind me of people relationships - some live in each others pockets, forever snuggling, some argue like crazy then make up with similar passion, some seem more like friends, some are decidely psychotic. Its hard enough to read our own species minds never mind bunnies. That said it sounds like your instinct is to reduce their space back til they are settled for a longer time. I'd follow your gut.

IME (Boo being my bossy rabbit) her behaviour has calmed over time but not changed.

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Omg I think you are so right!! I see all kinds on Facebook of examples of different relationships, I think you got them spot on lol! Just upsetting that they can’t be the pocket variety as I’m an anxious nervous person anyway without bunnies lol!
Thank you for your support. I kept them in their pen all of yesterday afternoon and evening and nobun complained and they were fine. Today I have used the puppy pen to fence of half the kitchen/diner and will keep it like that till the weekend and maybe give a bit more.

Does that mean bossy Boo is still nippy? Or just shows who’s boss still but now in a nicer way?


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Lisa1981 said:

I know how you feel I’m naturally a panicky person but some times they can feel what we are feeling as well so some of it could be that. I often sit by the hutch doing cross stich so I can hear but am totally emerged in boring monotonous concentration just to stop me feeling negative.
This is just a though so any one correct me if I’m wrong.

I hope things start to be on the up for your boys bonding and your piece of mind to x



Deep breaths and do what your gut is telling you. If you think it was to fast then reduce the space again and give it longer.

I won’t be allowing my buns in the living room for a few more weeks ( although they have the run of the hall ) as I have to bun prof it which had to be left till after Xmas. No idea if that’s going to mess things up but it couldn’t be helped.

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Yes I think we are very similar! Yeah that is why I tried to keep a distance when they first came back from the bonders because I think they could smell my anxiety a mile away lol!
No honestly it sounds like your doing everything right to me

Thank you, and thank you for your support. I hope your journey keeps going well with yours.

Personally unless the buns get nasty through frustration of being in a small space, I think taking it slow while you bun proof areas is fine and if anything will cement them together more as they will have been in closer quarters for longer.
Slow is definitely better than too fast, and not having chewed things is also better haha! X


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Truffpuff said:

Yes I think we are very similar! Yeah that is why I tried to keep a distance when they first came back from the bonders because I think they could smell my anxiety a mile away lol!
No honestly it sounds like your doing everything right to me

Thank you, and thank you for your support. I hope your journey keeps going well with yours.

Personally unless the buns get nasty through frustration of being in a small space, I think taking it slow while you bun proof areas is fine and if anything will cement them together more as they will have been in closer quarters for longer.
Slow is definitely better than too fast, and not having chewed things is also better haha! X


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Sounds like it but we muddle on and get there in the end

Your doing a good job with your two and they obviously think so to or they would have had issues with you reducing the space. I think every bun and every bun relationship is different so it’s like starting over each time but each single bun or group of buns teach you new things about rabbits and how to take care of them. It’s also like kids one big learning curve.

My two refused to go into the hallway again since yesterday afternoon for no apparent reason. I went into the cupboard in the hall for some thing for tea to find I had left the freezer open over night smart rabbits. They have ended up with extra pellets and apple sticks because I feel so bad about it.

Off ice skating for the first time in a month n wondering if I’m going to be coming back with all my body parts lol.

Hope the rest of your day goes well and that the boys keep being little angels

Truffpuff said:

Omg I think you are so right!! I see all kinds on Facebook of examples of different relationships, I think you got them spot on lol! Just upsetting that they can’t be the pocket variety as I’m an anxious nervous person anyway without bunnies lol!
Thank you for your support. I kept them in their pen all of yesterday afternoon and evening and nobun complained and they were fine. Today I have used the puppy pen to fence of half the kitchen/diner and will keep it like that till the weekend and maybe give a bit more.

Does that mean bossy Boo is still nippy? Or just shows who’s boss still but now in a nicer way?


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She is a little chasey, sometimes she'll manage a liitle fur pull but not often. She is a very demanding rabbit - totally adorable too of course

Lisa1981 said:

Sounds like it but we muddle on and get there in the end

Your doing a good job with your two and they obviously think so to or they would have had issues with you reducing the space. I think every bun and every bun relationship is different so it’s like starting over each time but each single bun or group of buns teach you new things about rabbits and how to take care of them. It’s also like kids one big learning curve.

My two refused to go into the hallway again since yesterday afternoon for no apparent reason. I went into the cupboard in the hall for some thing for tea to find I had left the freezer open over night smart rabbits. They have ended up with extra pellets and apple sticks because I feel so bad about it.

Off ice skating for the first time in a month n wondering if I’m going to be coming back with all my body parts lol.

Hope the rest of your day goes well and that the boys keep being little angels

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Thank you [emoji3590] it’s hard to remember that often because every occasion that’s bad I feel like I’ve failed, which I know sounds dramatic. As my first pair of rabbits I can say I have learned a lot! Lol.

Oh no! It’s funny when they do that! Sometimes something in a certain place is “spooky” then later on they will have forgotten all about it. Oh dear! I hope all your food was ok, I’ve done that before too but lucky it was ok.

Haha! I hope you do still have all the correct parts god it’s been like 15 years since I’ve been on ice! Used to go every weekend after watching our ice hockey team!

Thank you, although sadly not, they are back in the pen this evening. Luther again started acting up about 8pm :-(


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joey&boo said:

She is a little chasey, sometimes she'll manage a liitle fur pull but not often. She is a very demanding rabbit - totally adorable too of course

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I can’t wait to get to that point.

Literally crying this evening because I feel like I give all our animals 100% and I’ve had a fish die this evening that I’ve Ben treating because it was ill, and then 8pm despite having less room just half the kitchen diner Luther lost it again and launched at Truffle and pulled fur out his face. So I shut them in the pen, Truffle flopped next to Luey like he just wants the meanness to be all over and Luey licked him in the face!! I mean I’m just so lost and upset because we never had this the first time they bonded they just got on after until that really bad time when it all broke down.

It’s like he projects any small annoyance or frustration onto Truffle, so now he’s fenced off from the living room he’s bar biting and moving the bars then Truffle was near and he tries to nip him or circle.
I thought about a bunny behaviourist if there is such a thing.....although I’m sure I probably couldn’t afford it.

I wonder sometimes if Luther would have been happier if someone else adopted him :’-(


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Truffpuff said:

Thank you [emoji3590] it’s hard to remember that often because every occasion that’s bad I feel like I’ve failed, which I know sounds dramatic. As my first pair of rabbits I can say I have learned a lot! Lol.

Oh no! It’s funny when they do that! Sometimes something in a certain place is “spooky” then later on they will have forgotten all about it. Oh dear! I hope all your food was ok, I’ve done that before too but lucky it was ok.

Haha! I hope you do still have all the correct parts god it’s been like 15 years since I’ve been on ice! Used to go every weekend after watching our ice hockey team!

Thank you, although sadly not, they are back in the pen this evening. Luther again started acting up about 8pm :-(


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It’s not dramatic your being honest about how you feel with a situation. I’m like it and seem to find it can easily come when I’m anxious nervous or panicking.

It’s always good to learn and any thing that goes with making their life and yours better is a good thing

I’m thinking the hallway refusal was because it had gotten quiet a bit colder from the freezer. Food was fine as the cupboard keeps the cold in mostly.

I’m on the bus but had to count all my fingers and toes befor I left the ice rink lol we go twice a week (except over Christmas) it’s a brilliant way to get and keep in shape. I started again after a 20 year gap. Sounds like you used to have a great time

Oh no. How are they now? I remember reading that they couldn’t go back to the bonders again in another thread but could you not ring them for some advice and see what they think.

I hope things improve for you all xx

Lisa1981 said:

It’s not dramatic your being honest about how you feel with a situation. I’m like it and seem to find it can easily come when I’m anxious nervous or panicking.

It’s always good to learn and any thing that goes with making their life and yours better is a good thing

I’m thinking the hallway refusal was because it had gotten quiet a bit colder from the freezer. Food was fine as the cupboard keeps the cold in mostly.

I’m on the bus but had to count all my fingers and toes befor I left the ice rink lol we go twice a week (except over Christmas) it’s a brilliant way to get and keep in shape. I started again after a 20 year gap. Sounds like you used to have a great time

Oh no. How are they now? I remember reading that they couldn’t go back to the bonders again in another thread but could you not ring them for some advice and see what they think.

I hope things improve for you all xx

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Thank you I really appreciate that, because I’m home all day with them (and all the other pets) it can just all get a bit much and overwhelming when they don’t just get along and I don’t understand how to help. So I turn into a crazy person by the time my fiancé gets home, it’s hard to feel ok to nip out for a while at the moment too which doesn’t help.

Yeah that sounds like that could have been it, they don’t like cold peets hehe! Maybe the freezer made weird sounds being open too so it sounded like a monster.

Haha! Glad they are all there! Ah wow, that was quite a gap. Yeah in school it was our thing to watch mk lightning then skate free after. But now I’m a shut in grump who hates the cold hahaha! My OH wants to go with me though but I’ve been putting it off.

Yeah that was us unfortunately. Which is another reason I get so frustrated and upset because I know it’s really their last chance. I rang the bonders I think the second week after having them home because I was freaking out about the circling, he said to just do what they do and you gently push down on their shoulders to show them you are dominant and they are equal (I think is the thought process), but at that time I couldn’t get in fast enough so clapping and a squirt of water did the trick, but while they were out I did the pushing technique and it did work on stopping the behaviour but until Luther decides he’s over whatever is in his head he starts again or until I put them both in their pen in time out.
This evening I just left them in their pen and they were fine, occasionally I’d walk past to go into the kitchen and they’d be apart, cuddling or grooming.

I wish I knew how to help. Thank you, I really appreciate it xx




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I get that. I’m not in all day every day but I’m with mine a lot and spend a lot of time with them and any new thing worry’s me because I’m so new to rabbits and reading up on the internet can get quiet confusing a lot of the time.

We’ve been having the odd fur pull a lot of sniffing of behinds lately which has got me thinking do I really have two girls( surely breeder and a vet can’t be wrong) but then tonight there has been chasing and humping and they are getting more destructive and one is becoming nippy. Although I think it’s probably a dominance thing it’s put me on high alert and asking myself so many questions I’m sure I’ll be grey by morning.

My daughter is home educated and we use it as one of her therapies for a few of her diognosises and she’s doing really well with lessons so as much as I don’t like the cold it’s good for us both and how I lost 9 stone last year. There’s also a large group of kids that are home Ed and get together on a Friday at the ice rink so it’s good socially for her.
I would go when you can just wrap up well and you might be suprised that you redescovervwhy you loved doing it

It sounds like your doing every thing you can and using all the techniques you have been taught. I can emagen how frastrating it must be.
Have they been doing better in their pen then when they have a larger space? If so could you not give them more time in there. I know it’s not ideal but if they do better in smaller space like that maybe it’s worth a try? Idk because I’m new to all this but it can’t be all that bad if it’s going to help in the long run.

I hope you manage to get some rest tonight.
Your always welcome to pm if you need a chat