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Elphie ~ 04/10/18 - the brave, the fighter, the indomitable, the spirited

tlcwrites

Mama Doe
...a piece of my heart and soul.

8 years, 8 months, and 8 days you lived. 8 years, 8 months, 8 days, but less 8 weeks have been spent with me. 8 and a half years, my love, and so very much has changed over that best part of a decade.

This could have happened so much earlier than it has, but even so, I've dreaded this day. I knew it was coming, knew it was going to happen, knew it was inevitable. But that doesn't mean that the very thought of it made me shudder and feel sick. I kept pretending it wouldn't happen. I told you, you're not allowed to die, you're Elphie. But of course, reality gets in the way and sometimes reality just sucks.

Let's go way back, though, right back to the very beginning.

It was a blustery March, and my brother, saddened at the death of a previous bunny, said he would buy a bunny for each of us. We were still doing everything wrong, but we somehow persuaded Mum to let us have one last shot.

We'd only had bucks recently, so thought we'd have more luck with does. So, I did a search and found someone a considerable distance away selling three little blue dwarf lop does. It was very nearly not meant to be - we couldn't find the place! But thankfully, just before giving it up, we finally got there. To be honest, we just chose - out of the three of you - the first two we picked up! Your sister, Galinda, hadn't quite fully lopped yet but you had. You were slightly slightly smaller, slightly flatter in the face, but definitely the bigger personality.

Baby Elphie (back) and Galinda, on the day they arrived.
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You were also "my brother's" rabbit. Even though I was the one who ended up paying for everything aside from your purchase price.

You and Galinda were two tiny blue peas in a pod, but of course, you grew. And as you grew, so did the hormones. And when those hormones hit - oh my, you became a little beast. You were the one to grunt, lunge, and bite. You and Galinda fell out and were separated. I got you both spayed, both vaccinated, but you were still living in small hutches. And for that, I'm sorry. I learned slowly but you guided me step, by step, by step, until I'm where I am now.

Separate hutches, but still in smell of one another, I diligently (and inexpertly) cared for Galinda, whilst my brother's care of you grew lax. You began to lose weight and condition. In the end, frustrated by his lack of care of you, I confronted him. I told him to let me have you back. He wouldn't let me care for you because you were "his" and he flipped out if I tried to without his knowing. So I confronted him because it needed to happen. He wouldn't let me have you for nothing, so in the end I had to pay him the almighty sum of £4 to wrench you out of his grasp and save you. You recovered condition like a pro, like the fighter you always have been.

Cheeky young Elphie on a roam in the lounge at Christmas.
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Just before we got you upgraded, I had brain surgery. Oh you were only about a year and a half old by then, but still in the stupid small hutches. Aside from my loquaciousness, when going under the knife, the thing I was most concerned about was you and your sister. When I got home, and was reunited with you, just the day after(!), I opened the lid to your hutch and the first thing to happen? The wind blew it down on my head.

Maybe it knocked a bit of sense into me because after I recovered, and began doing more research, I decided it was time to upgrade your living conditions. It wasn't the best, but it was a start. You actually had a run, which was the main thing, it just wasn't big enough.

The next year, Nessarose arrived. She was a completely different kettle of fish - a magpie lionhead who'd been bred from once, and was terribly hormonal and territorial. And also, another girl. Even so, over the next couple of years, I tried to bond the three of you in different permutations, with little to no success. I knew companionship was a necessity, but was never quite sure how to go about it. During this time, I'd take you, Galinda, and Nessa to a local care home to entertain the residents. They adored all three of you, but you were especially good and especially patient with the residents. They always complimented your soft, soft fur and just how sweet you are. The staff loved you too, and it was part of the reason that dear Nessa was actually given to me in the first place.

one failed attempt at bonding - note the banana smeared on your head!
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In the end, upon doing more research around the time of Nessa's passing, I decided it was about time I invested in an appropriately sized hutch and run. It was about time I bonded you to a buddy - a buck. I also secretly hoped that a buck would finally help reunite you and your sister. After all, you'd lived so long in sight of one another, but still wouldn't bond. But first, Athena arrived. And although you were both girls I managed to bond you - for about a month! After that, one of you snuck up onto the table, stole a satsuma and you fell out completely. So, it was time for me to try bonding you with your sister once more.

Galinda, Archimedes, and Elphie - my first successful bond!
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Enter Archimedes. This beautiful old boy was a tricolour lop, adopted out to me as being a mere 2.5 years old. He was the bridging gap between you and Galinda. He was only with us for 3 months, but he was the catalyst to reuniting you and ensuring that finally, at the age of 5, you were back together again. But within 2 months, he degenerated and passed away. But you and Galinda were now happy together, and I was relieved.

Sisters, finally reunited and in an appropriate set up!
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But that wasn't meant to be either. Over the space of 5 months, Galinda deteriorated. I was giving her treatment, but went away for a weekend. My brother was meant to care for you both. When I was back, she was gone. I went outside, and found you standing on your sister's dead body, asking to be fed. But when I opened the hutch door, you wouldn't move.

Immediately, you became depressed. Within the very same day, I could see your little heart was broken at the loss of your little sister. That selfsame day, we immediately started looking for companionship. Lelantos had come and gone in the space of 3 weeks, too. My little chocolate brown mini rex. Had he not, you'd have been bonded to him. Instead, I was looking urgently for some rabbitty companions I could find for you asap. I found a neutered rex boy - Helios - but he came with a caveat; Selene, mother to his children, had to come too. Those 2 rexes are closely bonded but they fell in love with you immediately. In the bonding crate, you had one each side of you, both grooming an ear each. In spite of Selene not being spayed, it was love at first sight from those sweet rexes.

But it wasn't long until you were in bonding, again! River and Morning fell out spectacularly. For some reason I figured Morning might just bond with you and your rex friends. And lo and behold, I was right. For Morning, you have always been her best buddy, her best girl. The feeling wasn't entirely mutual - you were the matriach of the group, loud and proud. But Morning has always, always loved you. You and she made a lovely pair of blue girls, one with ears up and the other with ears down. And you worked well with the rexes too.

The first Wayward quad
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Quad in a Box!

However, over this time, you were still depressed. You may have had new friends, but a part of you, I think still missed your sister. Your health declined, you lost weight, and the group was brought in. Slowly you gained weight, slowly you fought back, with the grace and spirit you've always had. I inexpertly nursed you, but it was enough to revitalise your spirit and soul and you dug in and you fought for me. But when Selene was diagnosed with a liver tumour, the group was separated again. This time, you and Selene, who needed to be inside for the winter, and Morning and Helios.

Porridge for Elphie, and not being weighed thank you very much!
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With Selene, but still so thin.
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Selene thrived inside and so did you. But Selene thrived to the extent of being able to clear the baby gate and get into mischief. So, bonding again. This time, two very easy bonds that occurred immediately - you and Morning, and Helios back to Selene. You and Morning took back residence in the dining room and all was quiet in your life for a while. You and she loved trying to break into the laundry cupboard to sneak pellets out of the bag, especially if you thought nobody was looking. You loved sneaking into the kitchen too, and trying to steal the cat food. You carried on recovering and loved being in the house, being a house rabbit, being more involved in everyone's life.

With Arce. Oh how much you two gorgeous girls loved each other!
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And then, I decided to change things up again due to circumstances out of my control. Over a weekend, I bonded you to the rabbits we now had upstairs - Arce, Yuki, and Niji. You took control of the group immediately, but respected Arce. You were now co-matriach of a group of 5, and the feeding whirling dervish got that little bit bigger. You loved the change of scenery because it meant you got to spend so much more time with me. It just made everything that bit more convenient. And oh, your bond with Arce. Like Galinda, it was short-lived, but you really blossomed and shone. You two loved, loved, loved each other. It was like you'd found kindred spirits, two old souls that understood one another. And it was simply beautiful. You began to dead bunny flop more once again, and truly relax. It was like your spirit had finally been healed. And it lifted me again, as we always did, ebbing and flowing together. Seeing you happy made me happy. Morning of course was still around, and still loved you, but Arce really put that spring back in your step.

the week of Arce's death, you zonked out at the front in a very impressive DBF
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When Arce passed, Yuki flipped out though and you ended up going through the bonding process yet again, but for the final time. Enfys, a tiny and skittish mini lop, joined the clan. And of course, she was pretty fond of you too. And she helped Yuki with his serious lop fetish. He's had three big lady loves in his life (Morning doesn't count) - Arce, you, and little Enfys.

Enter the Enfys
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But during this time your condition was waning once again. You got put onto meloxaid for life for arthritis. You loved that stuff. But eventually, it got to a point when that alone wasn't enough for you. Tramadol was added, and Oxbow Joint Support treats. These went down well, like a treat. But to keep them away from everyone else, we had to give your treat and pain relief to you in the bathroom. And that meant that any time anyone went into the bathroom, you'd follow in the hopes that it meant you would get another one. Twice a day was clearly never enough. The tramadol really really helped; you even started climbing down a few steps again - something the perfectly healthy boys won't even do!

We increased the dose a little when you were a little off, at the consent of your lovely vet. You told us you weren't on enough by getting into a serious scrap with poor Enfys! What did that poor little girl do to you? But it didn't break the bond in the group, and you stabilised again. 2 weeks ago, you were even deemed healthy enough to have your Nobivac vaccination administered. 2 days ago, you were clambering onto my lap for treats and reaching up to my face to get your share. How different such a short space of time can make something.

And thus, you seemed fine, until today. Today, today, a day when my heart has been shattered. You ate most of your tramadol-and-oxbow treat, but wouldn't finish it until your daddy coerced you into doing so. You were eating but you weren't bright. You weren't moving right, you'd reached the end of your tether, and were antsy and irritable. The others were more-or-less trying to avoid you. I wanted to consider options, to keep you going. We could have increased the dose of tramadol - that was still an option - but then, you were also getting increasingly incontinent. You still had some spirit, but you were getting angry with yourself and with others.

Oh, you fought, right til the very end. You hopped out of arms, tried flicking your legs in disgust, nipped, and nibbled at my cardigan. You've bruised my arm and my soul today, girl. I took you outside, for a last feel of the outside breeze and grass. You hopped around the drive, still curious and investigative. You sat on my lap on the way to the vet.

Inside the vet, you continued to win and break more hearts. A lady had brought her cat in, and could see I was close to tears. She stroked you, and shared in our pain as we told her a bit about you. She said you were beautiful, looked in wonderful condition, and saw how very very special you are. When Z called us, we shared a hug as this kind lady dabbed away her own tears.

You tried to climb into my arms as you have done for so many years at the vets, for so many upright vaccinations, with your heart pressed near to mine. It didn't quite happen. Z was sad to see us, sad to see you were so much less yourself than you had been just 2 weeks ago, when she saw you last. When you were still hopping into my arms because that was where you simply had to be if you were at the vets.

We sat on the floor, you on my lap, your head just resting on my thigh. You fought the final moments, fought that injection, and it took you a long, long while to go. When you passed, you looked like you were merely resting your head on my lap. Tears wouldn't stop flowing. We brought you home for the guys to say their goodbyes. They didn't want to see you at first. Morning ran away, stomping up a storm. I think she's furious that her best girl isn't about. Enfys tried to cover you up. Yuki and Niji kept trying to groom you in the hopes you'd wake.

We've taken you back to the vets now. S, the nurse, took you gently and promised to look after you. You'll be cremated then returned home. I can't not have you near, not you, not my Elphie Elph, not my Flumpkin. Not my cheeky little fighter who was always so very happy to see me. You're a piece of my shadow now, but my heart feels hollow. Everyone is worrying about me. Everyone is missing you. You made such an impact on so many lives. Daddy misses you too. You were one of the special triach that helped him fall head over heels in love with rabbits. When he met us, he didn't understand. He thought it was a quirk, that rabbits are pests and it was a bit weird to love them like I did. But now he gets it. Now, he's one of us.

You met so many of my Wayward Buns; Galinda (of course), Athena, Archimedes, Helios, Selene, Morningstar, Arce, Yuki, Niji, and Enfys. You were the matriach of them all.

Slowly but surely you nudged me in the right direction, from someone haphazard and lazy, who didn't know what they were doing, to somebody who was comfortable in knowing what is the right thing to do, and the right way to go about it. With you, we went from small hutches, sawdust, and the wrong food and treats. To the right sized set ups, the right companions, the right food, the right bedding, the right medical treatment, and the grand old learning curve of foraging.

Foraging, that thing that gets me out of the house and into the fresh air. Learning so much more about the environment around me - around us. Finding out your absolute favourite food is the humble dock leaf. Learning about everything you can have, and you and your buddies could enjoy. And everything I foraged or scrounged you ate with gusto. I know so much more than I did on that blustery day when we picked you and your sister up.

You were the last of the "old guard", the remnant from where I didn't know what I was doing. You transitioned me, you made me better. You made me better FOR you because that was what you deserved.

You made me advocate for you and rabbitkind.

You were the perfect and patient tutor. And you didn't give up on me.

And I will continue to do so. In your name. With your spirit and tenacity. With your fight and your will.

You gave me times of worry and you fought back time and time again. For me, for yourself. You showed me how to live with illness, but not let it define you. What better role model can I ask for than you? But old age is one thing nobody can fight back against. My beautiful brave blue girl. You don't have to fight anymore.

Go meet Archimedes. Go meet Arce. Go join your sister and be two near-identical peas in a pod, together. Watch over me, please. Watch over us. I still need you and it hurts more than brain surgery to know you're not here anymore. My best friend, my perfect long-eared companion.

This is not goodbye, my love. How can I say goodbye to you? This is simply adieu, 'til we meet again.

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A cheeky butt shot with your sister
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During bonding with Athena
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Why do the grooming when you can look regal up front and centre?
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With sweet Archimedes
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Shortly after being bonded with the rexes
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Saying 'hi' to Bee
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Briefly, we feared Selene was pregnant again after we rescued her. You and Helios gave me this classic photo in that short time!
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Recovery bay for Selene's spay. This makes me sad because I knew - from experience - that some rabbits never see as much space.
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A cheeky quad
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Strawberry!
 
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Bonding with Enfys

And finally, my very favourite photos of you...

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Elphie ~ 27/01/10 - 04/10/18
passed away peacefully on my lap at 11.50am on the 4th October 2018, taking a piece of my heart with her.

I love you, my darling. xxx
 
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This tribute made me cry, I know exactly the hurt you we will be feeling right now. Please take comfort that she was loved so much and had a lovely peaceful passing. Sending all my love and hugs to you and your furry family xxx

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What a beautiful, moving and endearing tribute that has made me cry so much. What a beautiful rabbit and heartwarming story to follow her life. I almost feel a part of it. The photos mearly add to the unique bond that you all shared. My heart goes out to you and I know the pain that losing such a loved rabbit makes. Elphie had the life she truly deserved with you and lived it to the max with so many friendships and so many memories for her. A very very special rabbit indeed.
Hugs to you x
 
I'm so sorry to hear that Elphie has left us, T. You and your family are in my thoughts today. I know your beautiful girl watches over you. Such a lovely and moving tribute you've given her here.

Sweet dreams, Elphie. xxxxx
 
Elphie, everybun in your group is a bit... off right now. Especially Yuki and Morning.

And I saw the feathers in the car park, stopping at the car. And I know what we were talking about. I know I can love other rabbits, I know my heart has capacity for that, I do.

But I miss you so much it physically hurts.
 
So sorry to read this sad news. She was a beautiful bunny and so clearly loved.


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