Oliver
New Kit
I am new on this forum but have joined under sad circumstances.
My rabbit called Little Girl was put to sleep yesterday. I don't feel when I talk about her to other people they understand. There are lines for pet bereavement but I need to speak to other people who have had rabbits. Its difficult as people don't realise rabbits have such unique and different personalty traits.
I have so much guilt. I was reassured nothing could be done for her large tumour. But I feel I should have done more earlier. I didn't spot it until it was too late and the vet said it had probably spread. I wish I could have one more summer with her. I sat in the garden and did some gardening the day before she was put to sleep, I and thought to myself I will leave the rabbits in the shade of their hutch as the weather was intensely hot. On the night before I rushed her to the vets in the morning, I said to the family shall I bring Little Girl in and its was a "No she will be in the way I wouldn't do it until tomorrow" I had no idea anything of this would happen so fast or even at all. When I woke up that day yesterday
I just miss her so much I love her deary. She was a 'scaredy' rabbit, and she didn't mind being held she loved be stroked but didn't like being picked up. Sometimes when she was young for the first few years I would bring her in but she would hide. She had beautiful long eye lashes and you could tell by just looking at her she was a female. I feel its end of a era in my life, I had her for six years. This is what the problem is for me - Google that is my problem. Rabbits according to a Google search should live 8-12 years. She did not - I failed. I cant get over this feeling. I keep punishing myself saying she should have gone to a different home. But then I remember back she was the last nobody wanted in her litter. I have the memory of taking her home for the first time so strong. I have other pets rabbits from her family related to her, but Little Girl was my first. Little Girl was the one I only had a deep connection with and was my special one, she had the best and kindest temperament. She was a cautious rabbit but seemed wise.
I have to carry on for my other rabbits but now my special first rabbit is gone, I find it hard to love them. Its been a short time, but I feel guilty for burying her this morning and carrying on. It was very emotional, and thought to myself I can never move home ever in the future now she is buried here in the back garden. Unless the new owners let me visit. The pain is so intense and guilt.
I think it's the ending, of her life that has done this to me. The putting Little Girl to sleep. It was so sudden that she had one day left. If she had passed away on her own in her sleep I would be broken but it was the fact I had to drive her to the vets sit and wait a while for the late running appointment and pay to have her put down. It was a absolutely dreadful finish. Last night I had terrible nightmares with the moment her being injected in the vets room. The nightmare was so real. But in the nightmare I was in the vets examination room with her and the vet said she was taking too long and had to see other animals with their owners while I was still in the room holding her on the table. It's was a horrendous nightmare.
Please let know how I can get past this guilt. I feel bad as she is such a loss as she was so special. I feel I should have loved her more, but then I remember and I cant punish myself. I have realised the past few days that Little Girl was a rabbit, I keep confusing myself and blaming myself for not treating her like a cat or dog. I treated her like a rabbit, I wish I had her on my bed more and run around the house. But this is false image because she wasn't meant to do thing like that it wasn't natural to her breed. How do I know she knew she was loved. She was always a cautions rabbit. The thought of her not being here, Little Girl thinking to herself and moving her stuff about, is devastating.
My rabbit called Little Girl was put to sleep yesterday. I don't feel when I talk about her to other people they understand. There are lines for pet bereavement but I need to speak to other people who have had rabbits. Its difficult as people don't realise rabbits have such unique and different personalty traits.
I have so much guilt. I was reassured nothing could be done for her large tumour. But I feel I should have done more earlier. I didn't spot it until it was too late and the vet said it had probably spread. I wish I could have one more summer with her. I sat in the garden and did some gardening the day before she was put to sleep, I and thought to myself I will leave the rabbits in the shade of their hutch as the weather was intensely hot. On the night before I rushed her to the vets in the morning, I said to the family shall I bring Little Girl in and its was a "No she will be in the way I wouldn't do it until tomorrow" I had no idea anything of this would happen so fast or even at all. When I woke up that day yesterday
I just miss her so much I love her deary. She was a 'scaredy' rabbit, and she didn't mind being held she loved be stroked but didn't like being picked up. Sometimes when she was young for the first few years I would bring her in but she would hide. She had beautiful long eye lashes and you could tell by just looking at her she was a female. I feel its end of a era in my life, I had her for six years. This is what the problem is for me - Google that is my problem. Rabbits according to a Google search should live 8-12 years. She did not - I failed. I cant get over this feeling. I keep punishing myself saying she should have gone to a different home. But then I remember back she was the last nobody wanted in her litter. I have the memory of taking her home for the first time so strong. I have other pets rabbits from her family related to her, but Little Girl was my first. Little Girl was the one I only had a deep connection with and was my special one, she had the best and kindest temperament. She was a cautious rabbit but seemed wise.
I have to carry on for my other rabbits but now my special first rabbit is gone, I find it hard to love them. Its been a short time, but I feel guilty for burying her this morning and carrying on. It was very emotional, and thought to myself I can never move home ever in the future now she is buried here in the back garden. Unless the new owners let me visit. The pain is so intense and guilt.
I think it's the ending, of her life that has done this to me. The putting Little Girl to sleep. It was so sudden that she had one day left. If she had passed away on her own in her sleep I would be broken but it was the fact I had to drive her to the vets sit and wait a while for the late running appointment and pay to have her put down. It was a absolutely dreadful finish. Last night I had terrible nightmares with the moment her being injected in the vets room. The nightmare was so real. But in the nightmare I was in the vets examination room with her and the vet said she was taking too long and had to see other animals with their owners while I was still in the room holding her on the table. It's was a horrendous nightmare.
Please let know how I can get past this guilt. I feel bad as she is such a loss as she was so special. I feel I should have loved her more, but then I remember and I cant punish myself. I have realised the past few days that Little Girl was a rabbit, I keep confusing myself and blaming myself for not treating her like a cat or dog. I treated her like a rabbit, I wish I had her on my bed more and run around the house. But this is false image because she wasn't meant to do thing like that it wasn't natural to her breed. How do I know she knew she was loved. She was always a cautions rabbit. The thought of her not being here, Little Girl thinking to herself and moving her stuff about, is devastating.
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