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Help, feeling like I don't want my rabbits :(

smudgiebun

Alpha Buck
This is hard to write, please be gentle! :(

We've had our rabbits almost 7 years now, and before we had a baby they were our babies. We spent time with them and interacted with them. They got more than the bare minimum. I'm sad to say this is not the case anymore :( Don't get me wrong, they are looked after, fed, etc. and they still have tons of room. But they aren't getting the attention they used to and I'm starting to resent them being there and having to look after them. They have a big bedroom all to themselves, but it's a mess, hay and fur everywhere, it's a pain in the **** to keep tidy. They've ruined the carpet and the floorboard in the corner near their litterbox.

I hate admitting to all this. I just don't know what to do. I can't bear the thought of them actually leaving us, but I'm struggling to find the time and desire to look after them properly :(

Has anyone been through this?
 
Has anything changed in your life to make you feel like this? I know that when I changed my job it felt like I had much less time but I just had to adapt. Are you feeling run down or under the weather? I haven't felt how you do about my rabbits but I did feel like it towards my dogs several years ago. It felt like the joy they gave me was very minimal in return for the hard work it was to clear up after them. I battled on though cause I knew that I would regret it if I rehomed them
 
I think it's mainly just that I had a baby just under 2 years ago. The time I was able to spend with them reduced drastically, and now I just find them a chore :( I struggle a bit with PND which I guess may affect my feelings towards the rabbits.
 
Yes any kind of depression will definitely affect how you feel! Are they litter trained? I looked after my friends rabbits who aren't litter trained and it made me realise how easy mine are in comparison! I cleaned all 6 of mine in the same time to do her 2!! Maybe try to look at ways to reduce the cleaning time
 
I can completely understand feeling this way, although I might not like to admit it, its a feeling I have gone through exactly, I have a 13 month old son and since he was born I haven't taken as big a role in Milo and Finn's care as I used to, it's just been the nature of the beast for us.

My partner now gets up in the mornings and sweeps them up and gives them their hay,pellet and water and makes sure they are OK, I only really ever get time to cast my eyes on them in the evenings. He even changes their litter tray as we got into this habit when I was pregnant. I still do the nail clipping and grooming etc.

Would it make you feel better to maybe make yourself a schedule? This is what I did, I set aside Thursday evenings where I will go out just for half an hour to an hour and give them a really good groom and look over and will sit with them for a bit and just do some things with them. My partner agreed that I could do this and he would watch our baby for a little bit while I did it. He also takes our baby on a walk Friday or Saturday morning so I can hoover and clean them fully each week.

I know people love their animals, but I think its more than fair to admit that you have other priorities now. I can empathize completely with that. I guess you need to weigh up if you can manage with them, if you can, great, if you can't, then something will have to change, but nobody can tell you what to do, it has to be your choice.
x
 
When my children were little, I had 2 cats but no small furries. The cats were easy to look after, I just fed them and interacted with them as and when they wanted it.

BUT, I know I would have struggled with cleaning out/feeding/exercising rabbits with a baby to look after as well. We didn't get a rabbit again until my children were about 7 and 10.

If you are finding it so hard then now maybe the best time to surrender them to a rescue. There is no shame in this, it is much better to get help with the rabbits before it really gets too much for you.

Good luck with whatever you end up doing xx
 
Please don't be too hard on yourself, understandably since having a baby your priorities have changed.

We have 9 rabbits now, but none while the children were babies, but I can imagine that on top of having a young child to look after, it must feel like a 'chore'. I wouldn't worry too much that you have less time to spend with them, as they do have each other and a large space.

However, it's going to be difficult to not feel resentful of the mess, unless things can change. We have one indoor rabbit, who has the run of my daughters bedroom and there's always hay everywhere, but he is really good using litter trays. One thing that's worked really well is having the trays inside a cage (which is left open) so any stray wee ends up in the tray rather than on the floor. Do you use any covering on the carpet? We use Lino, which at first covered practically the whole room, but we've been able to move it to just one area now because he's pretty reliable.

Do you have any help with the rabbits? Or do you feel like it's all left to you to do?

Do they have time in an outside run, or are they solely indoor rabbits? I find that while he's outside, I can at least give things a good clean up and enjoy it looking nice, while it lasts. Have you thought about moving them outside, if all else fails? Or do you think it might not be right for them if they've always lived inside?

I don't think there's anything wrong in admitting to feeling this way. Hopefully there's something that can be done to make the situation better for everyone x
 
Don't feel guilty, do you have a garden, just an idea I'd yuou where to keep them could you set up a Wendy house and run home for them, that way your home won't be stressful with to deal with carpets etc ?
 
What *lily* says, and what mini lop 1 says, too.
Back in the day, people would have dropped on you from a great height for saying that now you have a baby, the rabbits have become a chore. Nowadays, there are people about who are far more reasonable. Whatever you decide, don't feel guilty or blame yourself. Life changes, people change.
 
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It's probably common to feel like a lot of things are a chore if you've had a baby and PND! Or for anyone else that's going through a rough patch, feeling stressed and having time consuming things going on etc. Many people even feel like taking care of the baby is a chore and a 24/7 job where they never get to do anything else, which is perfectly natural to feel as well.

So I don't think there's anything wrong with admitting this and reckon it's a lot more common than you think :) It's up to you to do what you think is best and make sure you won't regret it when you're feeling better. Maybe right now you could see if there's any changes you could make and see if that helps?
 
Thank you everyone for the replies! I've already tried to write a reply once but couldn't finish it in time lol!

With regards to the rabbits room, I'm just not sure how to keep it tidier. They have a litter tray which they use quite well, but they still pee over the edge especially against the wall, so the carpet there got ruined and we pulled a section up. We tried to put a section of lino down but they tried to eat it! So then we just had the floorboards which of course are now ruined.

The rest of the room is still carpet but there's hay everywhere. Maybe I don't hoover enough? It's not easy to sweep hay off a carpet so it has to be the hoover which juts stresses them out :(

I don't think we will ever consider putting them outside though, it would be too much work and money, and such a massive change for them I don't know how they'd cope.
 
I find it helps to have a blanket under the litter tray and in the area around the tray, then I can lift the edge up and the majority of the hay and poops line up along the edge of the box (if that makes sense) and then it's easier to hoover. Or I used to have a big flat tray from the bottom of a dog crate which would then protect the flooring. Or maybe a deeper tray? I used to use under bed storage boxes and they couldn't pee over the edge. I use a Manor Pet Housing hay rack tray now which Mackers very kindly gave me and they occasionally wee over the edge as it's a shorter tray but as it's always on a blanket I can just change the blanket as they don't do it that often.
 
I put one of Doughnut's litter trays on tiles so if she pees over the edge it sits on a puddle on there and not on the wooden flooring. I've also got clear Perspex stuck to my walls so she doesn't nibble some areas but you could always use that and put the litter tray on top.

I just think don't do anything hasty but just try to make small changes. Maybe sit with them for 30 minutes to see if you reconnect and start feeling differently.
 
I resent our rabbits sometimes, like today for instance, so you're not on your own. I had great plans for today but they've been completely scuppered because Thumper's not very well. Okay, she didn't choose nor want to become unwell and for selfish reasons it's annoyed me because we've had to stay at home now instead of me being able to take my children out to town and have an ice cream by the sea, potter around, the kids wanted to hand some CVs out to get a Saturday job each, but we can't. There are times when I look forward to the day we are pet-less. Not that I would wish them any harm, but when that day comes naturally, it'll be a relief.

So you're not on your own for thinking like it, it is natural I think. We can't give up our rabbits and wouldn't because Thumper gets ill quite regularly and I'd hate to think that a new owner wouldn't look after her the same, so she's ours until she passes. And in fact even though she gets ill so often, I'm glad she's ours because I know that we do look after her and get her medical attention so quickly - I fear that someone else wouldn't and that if someone else had bought her 6 years ago, she could very well be dead by now.

So do what I do when you feel a momentary dislike/resentment towards your bunnies; take a deep breath, make a cup of tea, and give them a fuss while you drink it and watch them for a bit. They are quite cute little creatures really with their own characters and funny ways and when they're in the mood for a fuss they are endearingly sweet, and before you know it you will have reconnected and those negative thoughts will have gone. For that moment anyway.

And there are lots of people on here who are around to help get your spirits back up and give advice when you are feeling low, so never feel alone or bottle things up; we're here to help :) x
 
Thank you everyone for the replies! I've already tried to write a reply once but couldn't finish it in time lol!

With regards to the rabbits room, I'm just not sure how to keep it tidier. They have a litter tray which they use quite well, but they still pee over the edge especially against the wall, so the carpet there got ruined and we pulled a section up. We tried to put a section of lino down but they tried to eat it! So then we just had the floorboards which of course are now ruined.

The rest of the room is still carpet but there's hay everywhere. Maybe I don't hoover enough? It's not easy to sweep hay off a carpet so it has to be the hoover which juts stresses them out :(

I don't think we will ever consider putting them outside though, it would be too much work and money, and such a massive change for them I don't know how they'd cope.
Sorry I've been missing this thread.

Lots of hugs for you!

With my Bunny room I hoover it twice a week. I sweep maybe twice a week if bad.
They have a 32l underbed storage box with hay rack which prevents them going over the edge. Maybe that's something that may help?
You could stand the tray onto a cheap carpet tile, just sand down the damaged wood if that'll salvage it?

(Angie B wrote a lovely, honest post)
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There are times when I look forward to the day we are pet-less. Not that I would wish them any harm, but when that day comes naturally, it'll be a relief

Oh god, I feel this too sometimes and I feel HORRIBLE about it :(

Daphne, sounds like you hoover a lot more than I do! We leave their room for weeks without being hoovered so it ends up a right mess of hay strewn across the room. I struggle with motivation for housework in general so hoovering the rabbits just feel like an extra chore I really can't be bothered with. But I am well aware that the more frequently you do housework the easier it is!! I am my own worst enemy!

Someone suggested a nice high litterbox, I think this is what we need to do to stop further damage to the flooring. We have this at the moment, but it's obviously not doing the job: http://www.petsathome.com/shop/en/pets/pets-at-home-cat-litter-tray-starter-kit
It's too low because both bunnies can easily lift their butts over the edge when it's filled with bedding and hay.

So I think I need to get something taller, like the underbed storage idea.

Maybe if I can make the room cleaner and nicer I'll be more inclined to be in there and see them...
 
Oh god, I feel this too sometimes and I feel HORRIBLE about it :(

Daphne, sounds like you hoover a lot more than I do! We leave their room for weeks without being hoovered so it ends up a right mess of hay strewn across the room. I struggle with motivation for housework in general so hoovering the rabbits just feel like an extra chore I really can't be bothered with. But I am well aware that the more frequently you do housework the easier it is!! I am my own worst enemy!

Someone suggested a nice high litterbox, I think this is what we need to do to stop further damage to the flooring. We have this at the moment, but it's obviously not doing the job: http://www.petsathome.com/shop/en/pets/pets-at-home-cat-litter-tray-starter-kit
It's too low because both bunnies can easily lift their butts over the edge when it's filled with bedding and hay.

So I think I need to get something taller, like the underbed storage idea.

Maybe if I can make the room cleaner and nicer I'll be more inclined to be in there and see them...


Yes 10cm for that litterbox isn't very high.

Mine have a minimum of 19cm and also 23 cm ... Nothing escapes :D
 
Oh god, I feel this too sometimes and I feel HORRIBLE about it :(

Daphne, sounds like you hoover a lot more than I do! We leave their room for weeks without being hoovered so it ends up a right mess of hay strewn across the room. I struggle with motivation for housework in general so hoovering the rabbits just feel like an extra chore I really can't be bothered with. But I am well aware that the more frequently you do housework the easier it is!! I am my own worst enemy!

Someone suggested a nice high litterbox, I think this is what we need to do to stop further damage to the flooring. We have this at the moment, but it's obviously not doing the job: http://www.petsathome.com/shop/en/pets/pets-at-home-cat-litter-tray-starter-kit
It's too low because both bunnies can easily lift their butts over the edge when it's filled with bedding and hay.

So I think I need to get something taller, like the underbed storage idea.

Maybe if I can make the room cleaner and nicer I'll be more inclined to be in there and see them...

I find when the bunny room is a mess I don't want to be in there. We now have a desk in there to work at so OH helps a little bit more with the cleaning but not massive amounts.

You can get the underbed box from about £1 and up so worth a try.

This is what my girls have from Manor Pet Housing.

28c145a06b0edf0b54b5be9c1c648e66.jpg




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