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Thread: When to give up?

  1. #11
    Young Bun
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    Sorry just to add to my novel: we had previously set ourselves deadlines. It was like the buns knew this though. Each time we'd approach a deadline they'd really up their bonding game and become loved up. We'd then find it impossible to separate them. A few days would pass and they'd be putting doubts in our minds again so a new deadline would be set.

    They've got us in a cycle of mind games!

  2. #12
    Warren Veteran daphnephoebe's Avatar
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    I'm really tempted to suggest a vet visit for Molly from what you've described just for piece of mind.

    My Daphne was like this til the last min of the bond. It took over 3 months to get them to a stable bond where I could leave them alone.

    What do they have to do over night and what is their square foot roughly?

    I'm going to suggest something I never normally endorse, but because you've come so far I he bond I feel it may be worth while to try.
    When taking Molly to the vets, take the other two and have them all travel in the car together. This will allow them to all comfort each other during a stressful experience. If you're worried about fighting, have them in separate cases facing each other.

    Again, it's not something I normally recommend as it's a stressful situation for them and bonding is normally stressful. But they're already living together and know each other so this could be the little push they need.

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  3. #13
    Young Bun
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    Thank you for responding.

    Funnily enough they all went for their vaccinations just last week so all in the same car and carrier, all huddled together in the vets and then all hunched together when we got home.

    They get full checks at the vets and received the all clear.

    They have access to the whole of downstairs so that includes living room, dining room, kitchen, pantry and sun room overnight then they have the garden and barn during the day. I did wonder about making it more interesting though, maybe putting in some wicker mazes, cardboard castles, that sort of thing. Molly loves being up high, so I could maybe get her an indoor climbing frame?

    She's being difficult again today. She played out for a while then approached Bloo inside, Bloo put her head down for a clean and molly went to attack her.

    It has been quite muggy here for the last couple of weeks so maybe that's making her miserable? She does have a fan she can sit by though. Her behaviour is so weird I just don't get it. It's making me very nervous for the future too, the thought that this could happen at any time is unsettling.

  4. #14
    Warren Veteran daphnephoebe's Avatar
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    Glad they got the all clear and the visit was okay. also good they got along in the car and supported each other.

    I'd maybe try providing them things to do together to help strengthen the bond.
    Boxes of hay with forage mixed in etc.
    I'd also smear a little Strawberry jam on Bloo s head to encourage Molly to groom & not attack.

    Hopefully MM will be back soon to give further advice but this is what I would try.

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  5. #15
    Warren Scout Zarla's Avatar
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    I would be too wary of abscesses forming from bite wounds to carry on with this.

    Abscesses in buns are very tricky to treat, often recur, and can cause death. I don't think you'll ever be able to trust Molly unsupervised if she is this aggressive when you're around and doing a night shift can't be sustainable, surely? I only hope Molly doesn't start attacking your male bun when Bloo is removed.

  6. #16
    Young Bun
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    Thank you for your responses.

    I got back to some basics last night with treat smearing on heads like you suggested, daphne. It seemed to go well, lots of not negative interaction between them.

    They've spent the day sleeping next to each other today and there's been no funny business.

    Molly definitely still isn't her self though. She seems very tense and I can't seem to make her lighten up so maybe another vet visit might be a good idea.

    I agree, Zarla. Overnight shifts aren't sustainable and it's not doing us any good at the minute but it is so hard to give up. If we have to we will though. It'd be easier if they did just decide to dislike each other and leave it at that, it's the fact that they will have such lovely moments in between that make it all so difficult to judge.

  7. #17
    Warren Veteran joey&boo's Avatar
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    I agree if they were less off / on it'd be so much easier but as usual we're left trying to guess what they want.Typical of bunnies. I remember all the feelings you're experiencing no & I don't envy you. A second check up for Molly might be beneficial x

  8. #18
    Wise Old Thumper MightyMax's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatchMagic View Post
    Thank you for your responses.

    I got back to some basics last night with treat smearing on heads like you suggested, daphne. It seemed to go well, lots of not negative interaction between them.

    They've spent the day sleeping next to each other today and there's been no funny business.

    Molly definitely still isn't her self though. She seems very tense and I can't seem to make her lighten up so maybe another vet visit might be a good idea.

    I agree, Zarla. Overnight shifts aren't sustainable and it's not doing us any good at the minute but it is so hard to give up. If we have to we will though. It'd be easier if they did just decide to dislike each other and leave it at that, it's the fact that they will have such lovely moments in between that make it all so difficult to judge.

    I have to say that I had one tricky bonding where it transpired that one of the rabbits had an incipient jaw abscess.

    I wish we could know these things when we start off the bonding .... impending ill health *does* make a difference to the way a bond goes. It doesn't always ruin it, but it's certainly different.

  9. #19
    Warren Veteran daphnephoebe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatchMagic View Post
    Thank you for your responses.

    I got back to some basics last night with treat smearing on heads like you suggested, daphne. It seemed to go well, lots of not negative interaction between them.

    They've spent the day sleeping next to each other today and there's been no funny business.

    Molly definitely still isn't her self though. She seems very tense and I can't seem to make her lighten up so maybe another vet visit might be a good idea.

    I agree, Zarla. Overnight shifts aren't sustainable and it's not doing us any good at the minute but it is so hard to give up. If we have to we will though. It'd be easier if they did just decide to dislike each other and leave it at that, it's the fact that they will have such lovely moments in between that make it all so difficult to judge.
    I think another visit would be good for piece of mind. Have a really thorough check over of her for anything slightly wrong.
    Also watch her behaviour very closely for a trigger. A tiny little thing could be the cause.

    Have you considered pet remedy? It helps my girls bond considerably and I notice when it runs out.

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  10. #20
    Young Bun
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    Hi all,

    So we took both ladies for a thorough checkup and both were absolutely fine. We've had a holiday booked in between my posts so sorry for the delay.

    We decided to separate the girls and get Bloo another friend. Although things were calming down between Bloo & Molly it wasn't getting to a bonded stage. Pumpkin & molly enjoy being out all day and playing in the barn whereas Bloo is very much an indoor, comfy blankets kinda gal. So we were either forcing pumpkin & molly to stay in to allow them exposure or Bloo was on her own. Everyone was getting pretty miserable.

    So today we picked up Bloo's friend. He's a neutered male called Boris! He was taken to the rescue because he was 'naughty'. I strongly suspect he was abused though because he is terrified of humans. Whenever I lift my hand, for example to hand him a treat, he cowers and gets ready to attack. He won't let us touch him at all.

    Fortunately he has bonded well with a bun in the past, apparently. So hopefully he'll take well to Bloo and we can earn his trust over time.

    They're currently set up with a barrier between them so they can live side by side for a while. Bloo is being the dominant bun so far & Boris seems unperturbed by it. So fingers crossed this is the start of a great new bond.

    Thank you all for your help, we all really appreciated it.

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