Hi folks,
I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get back on here to firstly thank you all so much for your help and advice, and secondly to update you.
When I took Gilby back to that vet, they were really shocked he was doing so well and agreed he wasn't ready to be put down.
I asked about how they could be sure it was cancer and not another type of lump (like an abscess) and I was told it looked like cancer.
Gilbert was not offered any antibiotics nor painkillers, but I told my mum to double his dose of metacam (thanks to people on here for clarifying buns can be on metacam long term).
Over the last fortnight, Gilby went downhill again. I came up to visit, and saw he wasn't eating properly and I feared stasis, and noticed his jaw was misaligned and his teeth were cutting into his mouth.
I took him to a rabbit savvy vet, Sarah Pellet at Animates (thank you for the recommendation and links) who said it wasn't cancer at all, it was end stage dental disease, and the lump was an abscess that had been eating away at the jaw - basically Gilby was misdiagnosed previously. She did a conscious x-ray, which wasn't easy as Gilby kept moving, but it showed fractures to the jaw, and she confirmed it was all very lumpy. I cried so much, as I didn't know Gilby was suffering so much over the past few months.
I was offered three options: 1. A GA with the view to draining the abscess, giving him a dental and doing x-rays - however she clarified there was no cure and said it would be likely that the jaw would be too delicate to withstand surgery and she said there'd be a high chance that she'd think it kindest to not wake him up. 2. Palliative care 3. Euthanasia.
I was so shocked, I opted for palliative care, and paid out quite a bit for 5 different meds - antibiotics, painkillers, emeraid and ranitidine for his stomach. She clipped his front teeth too as they were cutting into his lip.
When I got him home I felt I'd regretted not having him pts as he stopped eating altogether, meaning I had to syringe his meds, which was distressing for him, especially with his painful jaw. He wasn't interested in interacting either, and only hopped into quiet dark corners.
Sarah has been on leave so I wasn't able to ring her, but I called the receptionist, who told me to syringe feed him. I did, but it was distressing for him - far worse than when I had to do it last year for stasis.
I felt "it is time". And so did my mum.
Then he went and perked up again. The syring feeding worked and he started eating and pooping, so I've stopped. The past two days he's been bounding about (periodically, not all the time), eating his softened food, and has started following me about again - however my mum has been upset by it all and keeps telling me to bear in mind that the rabbit savvy vet did give him a prognosis of days to weeks at best, and she reminded me that he is pumped full of painkillers, and has a jaw that's being eaten away.
I know rabbits hide their pain, being prey animals. I also know that he's on all these meds, and I also recognise that my mum can't give him the same attention as me - she's got arthritis and can't sit down on the floor and pet him for example. And I was very upset to see the results of the x-ray.
With this in mind, I feel I have to have him pts. It still doesn't sit well though - sometimes I'm sure that's the right decision, and other times it fills me with panic, especially when he's following me about the place.
Sarah the rabbit-savvy vet explained that rabbits can rally and go up and down and she's right, that's what Gilbert is doing. She's still on leave until Friday so I can't take him there, but I found a brand new vets which specialises in small pets that's opened in the village here (I don't want to take him back to the vets that misdiagnosed him and didn't give him antibiotics and painkillers for his abscesses for months) and I called by today, without Gilby, for a chat and they said they can do it via the tummy, or possibly the ear, and that I can hold him. I keep crying every time I think about it, but I think that on balance, my mum's the one who has to look after him when I'm not here, the rabbit savvy vet gave him days-weeks (mind you, he had that prognosis 3-4 months ago!) and said there's no cure, just palliative care, and maybe with him being my first pet and having never gone through this before, maybe I'm misreading all the "positives" and I ought to get it done. Last week when we got back from the vets and he didn't eat or interact I was sure it was the right time to have him pts. Now he's chipper again and I just can't read it.
Is it always this difficult to make the decision? Am I keeping him alive for my sake?
I'd find it far easier if he hadn't have been so chipper these last couple of days. I honestly just wish I didn't have too make that decision and hope that he'd just pass away naturally - but pain free.
I love him so much, hate to think of him suffering, and just want the very best for him.
Please don't feel you have to reply to this - I know I disappeared for a couple of months. I do however want to give a huge thanks to the helpful advice I was given before - and especially wanted to thank you for recommending another rabbit savvy vet. Sarah at Animates was wonderful. Just a shame I hadn't taken Gilby there before.
