How Soon is Too Soon?

I've recently lost my beloved Merlin He was a wonderful 8 years old but contracted snuffles & a resp infection, he faught it so bravely for 3 weeks bless him on anti biotics, pain relief and lots of extra TLC

Unfortunately though his mind was VERY willing he sadly passed away on Sunday 25th - I was devastated, he's been my companion for so long, held MANY secrets and was such an awesome friend, his personality was naughty, but loving, and I am so so missing his cuddles already - I haven't yet had the heart to clear up all his bits, and his dog crate that he use to use as his "base" there's something a little soul destroying about clearing away the food and hay and toys without him going back in it.

With him being ill for so long, he did loose a lot of his character, he still loved his cuddles, and breakfast, but a LOT of his personality went with that illness, he lost an awful lot of weight and it was me alone nursing him as my OH had to work.. It's a great BIG hole he's left.

My point is how soon is too soon to be getting another bunny, I know it must be different for everyone, but yesterday I rang my local rescue to see if they had bunnies in, they've offered me to come down for a look and a cuddle (they only have a few in though) BUT is this too soon?

Obviously there's no harm in looking but surely I can't be ready for this, it feels like Merlin has been gone for longer then his actual passing due to him being poorly, but am I just trying to cover my hurt.. I have grieved.. Immensly for him, he's had a cremation too and I have his ashes in a sun trap as he loved sunning his furs... But my house is just so quiet & empty.

I've tried talking to my OH but her & Merlin did not really have a great bond as we did, as she came later on the scene and I am sure Merlin was not impressed with sharing mummy's attentions lol xx

Sorry for the long post.. I just have no one to talk to at home.. Too much have I heard "He is just a bun" xx

Hi There, there is no one answer to this question and it is something that I have struggled with in the past when getting new partners for a remaining lone bun.

I would say go with your feelings, It is hard when our friends leave us however it is not a case of replacing Merlin more like using the opportunity to give another bun in need a loving forever home whilst freeing up a space in the rescue for some bunny else.

there is no harm in going to meet the buns in the rescue and if you connect with some bunny else you'll know it is right.

Think about it being out of respect for Merlin rather than replacing him

Hope this helps

I'm so sorry you lost Merlin there is no right or wrong answer to your question, personally I tend to want the positivity of another friend coming into my life fairly soon, I never think of the new pet replacing the pet I've lost, but more of a positive opportunity to provide a new friend a loving home. I would do whatever feels right for you :thumb:

Sorry for the loss of your beloved Merlin. They never leave you.

In answer to your question: only you know. I tend to feel the absence very viscerally too, so would need somebunny else to love very quickly after. It took everything in my power to not get somebunny else when Archimedes passed, as my remaining rabbits were in happily established pairs and didn't need somebun coming along and disrupting it.

It's not a replacement, it's just bringing another into your life to love. The relationship will always be different and a new love won't make you forget the older one, and it won't dishonour Merlin, no matter how soon, or not, or not at all, that it happens.

Whatever you choose to do, good luck.

You will just know when the right time is. I got Herbie & Inca after I lost Kermit, took me about 2 months. But when I lost Inca it took me about 2 weeks to get Hollie.

You don't replace the ones you have lost, you have room in your heart to give a new one love

So sorry to hear about the loss of Merlin! I have recently been in a similar situation to but only had my little Fudge for about 8 weeks before he passed away while being neutered, my house felt so empty without him so I also got in contact with a rescue centre and went to visit them. I have now adopted 2 brothers and it has made me so happy, seeing them together having fun, snuggling up......my hubby calls them bookends!! They have defiantly filled a hole in our house. they haven't replaced Fudge cause he will always be in my heart but it also feels good knowing I've given them a forever home.

Only you can decide what is best for you, maybe go along to the rescue centre to just say hi and have a cuddle with some bunnies! I'm sure the rabbits would like to see a new face!!

Good luck in what you decide to do xx

So sorry you lost Merlin.

I've waited a year since my bunnies died to consider getting other animals but a lot of that was driven by a change in personal circumstances rather than anything. Had I not had to deal with that I probably would have got more rabbits straight away.

See I know it sound awful, but I feel I've lost Merlin a month ago.. As opposed to the week because he was poorly for a while and a lot of his traits went, though he still wanted his mummy close by and cuddles and wanting up on the sofa, it was hard to watch him detoriate, but I guess that is a month for me, whereas my OH is saying it's been only a week are you sure it's not too soon??

Well to me I'm at home all day, I work from home so had the luxury of a VERY close bond, and contact with Merlin, and I hope to be able to give another bunny a home, we've rowed this morning (OH and me) cause I've said surely there's no harm.. However OH seems very offhanded about it, which puts me of cause surely she needs to like the idea too.. To a degree lol x

There isn't many rescues around my area (thankfully or not) so isn't many bunnies to choose from, so a bunny may not take a liking to me anyway but surely there's no harm in a visit?

GAH, Thanks all for your responses, I just don't know where to turn with this one, I certainly don't want people to think I didn't care about Merlin and his passing hasn't affected me as it jolly well has.. A LOT But I guess I got use to him being sick.. AND the night he died.. I just knew so I actually stayed up with him for it and slept out with him I was that sure :\

I don't think there's such a thing as too soon. It definitely depends on each situation and if you feel ready to open up your heart to a new little on then go ahead. No one could judge you for giving another animal in need a home.

I don't think there is a too soon. You know you aren't, couldn't replace Merlin but there is such a hole in your routine and heart without him that needs filling. He would understand x Plus another bunny benefits of having a loving home

That was my thoughts, surely I can't be judged for giving a loving home?

I've actually fell right in love with Oreo & Frank in the bunnies needing a home section.. I don't think I could live any further away from them though They're such darlings x

FireRose said:

That was my thoughts, surely I can't be judged for giving a loving home?

I've actually fell right in love with Oreo & Frank in the bunnies needing a home section.. I don't think I could live any further away from them though They're such darlings x

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I don't know where you are and where they are, but some rescues rehome nationwide, and people have often managed to do a bunny run (a sort of relay of people) to get rabbits to a new home, so it may be possible with the power of RU :thumb:

I think sometimes the right bunny just comes along, when I lost Luna I was devastated but I didn't want Zero to be on his own. I went to have a look at the RSPCA after a week and ended up bring Breeze home, I didn't intend to get another so fast but when I saw her it just felt right x

I am in Kent - And they are in Nottingham(shire?) I think Nottingham, so a wayyy for them to go so not sure if that is going to be do-able? x

Zoobec said:

I don't know where you are and where they are, but some rescues rehome nationwide, and people have often managed to do a bunny run (a sort of relay of people) to get rabbits to a new home, so it may be possible with the power of RU :thumb:

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I am in Kent, and they're in Nottingham(Shire?) I am not sure if that's just TOO far away and do-able, they're in the rabbits needing a home section x

FireRose said:

I am in Kent, and they're in Nottingham(Shire?) I am not sure if that's just TOO far away and do-able, they're in the rabbits needing a home section x

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Not sure if that rescue rehomes nationally or not, but there have been some pretty impressive bunny runs done before.

Oh I'm so sorry to hear that.:'-(everyone has a different opinion basically whenever you feel ready.me personally I would get one as soon as possible.but whenever you feel ready.

I've messaged them to see if it is do-able I just have a feeling it WILL be too far, but some thing are not meant to be and perhaps there's one needing me more closer to home??

We're off to a local RSPCA rescue centre today, we don't really seem to have many individual ones right here in Kent, and the ones I've managed to find have no bunnies available. I will keep looking x

Sorry you lost Merlin. Sounds like you had a lovely bond with him.

I hope you manage to find more rabbits to love very soon