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Bonding-feel a failure :-(

Pets mum

Wise Old Thumper
Well this was the weekend, due to various circumstances, and if I'm honest I've been putting it off, I was going to rebond Toffee (boy) and Treacle, his sister. Treacle was always the dominant one, but they had a lovely relationship, until her hormones kicked in, and then I had her speyed.
I tried putting them back together about 2 weeks after her op (I know better now) and it kicked off big time, so separated them again.
I've been putting them next to each other all week, swapping toys etc. I had a small dog crate ready, neither of them had been in it before, and was all prepared to sleep downstairs with them. I put him in, and quickly followed with Treacle. Bless her, she sniffed him, went straight to the hay and started munching happily, Toffee sat in a corner hunched up, then suddenly lunged at her, and pulled a big chunk of fur off her side. That was it, they both went for each other. I sprayed loads of water on them, clapped, but it made no difference. They were both lying on their sides going for each other, I had to go in and grab them and pull them apart.
I know to expect some chasing and fur pulling, but I think this went beyond that, but never having done a bond before I'm not really sure. I just couldn't sit there and watch them rip each into other.
So they are back in the shed, in their individual hutches. They each have plenty of room, and will have to take turns to use the attached enclosure. I will probably get another one too so they can both have access to outside.
I know some people suggest rehoming one of them, but I just don't want to part with either of them. They get plenty of attention from me, I am retired so can spend time with each of them. So that's it, I'm not putting them, or me through that again. I know it's not ideal, and I feel really upset over what's happened. I feel like I've failed them :)
 
Oh, don't feel like a failure, bonds don't always work first time. I don't know the background, has he been neutered too? And how long ago was she spayed? It's recommended to wait at least 6 weeks post op for hormones to die down. Was the dog crate completely neutral, where no other bunny had been before? And was anything you put in neutral?

How about asking if there are any rescues nearby or anyone local who might have a go at bonding them for you? Possibly they may bond better away from home, and your nerves won't take a bashing either.

You could post on here asking for bonding services near where you live :thumb:
 
Oh, don't feel like a failure, bonds don't always work first time. I don't know the background, has he been neutered too? And how long ago was she spayed? It's recommended to wait at least 6 weeks post op for hormones to die down. Was the dog crate completely neutral, where no other bunny had been before? And was anything you put in neutral?

How about asking if there are any rescues nearby or anyone local who might have a go at bonding them for you? Possibly they may bond better away from home, and your nerves won't take a bashing either.

You could post on here asking for bonding services near where you live :thumb:

Yes he's been neutered. She was done about 3 months ago. The crate was new, and only had hay in it !
Yes I suppose I could ask, but I am quite remote, don't think many people even keep bunnies up here, vets don't see many, mine are quite a novelty :lol:
Sorry for coming across so negative, I'm just really tired and disappointed. Thanks for suggestions Zoobec.
 
Yes he's been neutered. She was done about 3 months ago. The crate was new, and only had hay in it !
Yes I suppose I could ask, but I am quite remote, don't think many people even keep bunnies up here, vets don't see many, mine are quite a novelty :lol:
Sorry for coming across so negative, I'm just really tired and disappointed. Thanks for suggestions Zoobec.

Well, it sounds like you really couldn't have done anything any differently, It's understandable that you feel despondent. I would put a post up, asking for bonding services/help, you've got nothing to lose by it :thumb: some rescues will do bonding for a donation :thumb:
 
I would also suggest someone else bonding them for you. It sounded like quite a serious fight. Some buns simply dislike each other, but I do believe that most buns will bond eventually. It's just a case of knowing exactly how to do things and how to prevent a fight before it begins.

I'm sorry things have gone wrong but don't feel bad. If you can't find anybody else to bond them for you, maybe you could try bonding them in a friend's/family member's house?
 
It is very disheartening when a bond isn't successful. They may have needed more space. It sounds like the female was quite happy but not the male for some reason - it's usually the other way round!

What I would suggest, if you can't find a rescue to bond them, is leave it for a few months then try them again in a biggish area, if possible. By then all hormones etc should have died down and they may even like the idea of having a closer relationship with another bunny.
 
Thanks everyone for your advice, yes I was surprised it was the male that started it, he is such a quiet softy bun. Unfortunately, no rescues around here, and it's just not practical to try anywhere miles away.
Making plans for them both, to get them through winter in their shed, giving them separate outdoor access etc.
Will try again in a few months and see how it goes, give them plenty of time to settle back down, and forget what happened hopefully.
Bunnies eh ! :lol:
 
Sometimes the soft boys get scared of another rabbit so that is something to bear in mind when you try them together in the future.
 
Well done for trying - stoopid bunnies never seem to know what's good for them

I've read you should put the boy in first - as you did - as females are more territorial. But maybe in this case it could be worth putting him in second as if he's in her space he might be a little more respectful (obvs not actually her space, still neutral, but hers for a few moments longer than his!!) am sure that's not the full answer but might help a teeny bit?
 
Well done for trying - stoopid bunnies never seem to know what's good for them

I've read you should put the boy in first - as you did - as females are more territorial. But maybe in this case it could be worth putting him in second as if he's in her space he might be a little more respectful (obvs not actually her space, still neutral, but hers for a few moments longer than his!!) am sure that's not the full answer but might help a teeny bit?

Thanks, all advice gratefully received :thumb: wasn't sure which to put in first actually, will try her first next time. Just clearing up the mess now, clumps of lovely fur everywhere, couldn't face it last night. Well the sun is shining, they are both outside in separate pens, looking as though nothing happened, just me frazzled then :lol:
I knew I should have got a budgie instead :lol::lol:
 
Thanks, all advice gratefully received :thumb: wasn't sure which to put in first actually, will try her first next time. Just clearing up the mess now, clumps of lovely fur everywhere, couldn't face it last night. Well the sun is shining, they are both outside in separate pens, looking as though nothing happened, just me frazzled then :lol:
I knew I should have got a budgie instead :lol::lol:

Sounds really scary/stressful for you. Well done for trying! I have no experience but read that a car journey can work. Wondered if anyone had tried that (although wouldn't allow for any quick separation or monitoring etc..?)
 
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