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To Re-home or Not?? - Bond Broken Down

nickybunny1

Mama Doe
I really really do not know what to do !!

I had four free range house bunnies all bonded - until my Lance passed away two months ago :( leaving me with my two boys Oliver (3 years old) and Cody (6 years old) and my girl Rosie (6 years old)

After Lance passed away the other three seemed to all be ok - rosie and oliver were always closer but all 3 would still snuggle together from time to time but now for this past couple of weeks Cody (6 years old) seems to hid away under a box near their living area and seems so jumpy around the others and afraid of them - rosie would give him a tiny nip the odd time especially around food and as soon as she does he runs to the litter tray or into his box to hid - he is afraid of her at times. He spends so much time under the box and his appetite is less - still eatting though but the other two are more into doing their own thing so run aorund the house. Cody would have been more of a loner anyway but i am not sure if thats because he never had a close bond with any of the other bunnies. I am soo afraid that he is getting depressed. He is sort of agraphopic too though as they live in the kitchen but he will go outside to the garden by sticking tight to the skirting boards but will not put a step from the kitchen into the hall. The other two go into every room available.

I cant help but think he is soo lonely and is being bullied now and that i am depriving him of having a one to one bond with a female somewhere and not have to worry about being bullied - i know deep down he is unhappy and it is breaking my heart. Problem is even if i thought that he would be happy with another bun i cannot get another parter for him as after loosing lance i have decided after my bunnies are no longer with me that i wont ever get any more pets as the pain of loosing them is unbearable.

Here is the question - my only rehoming option is to take him back to the sanctuary where he came from but what if he goes to a home where they keep him in a hutch , want to lift him, too many kids poking him, he is such a sesitive gentle soul and would he be really stressed at the santuary but at least he would have a partner hopefully. I really need him to have a free range home like he currently has as he has never been caged in the 6 years he has been with us. i dont know what to do for the best as he deserves to be happy but is he better staying with me in his current situation and hope that it improves or do i try to rehome ?? Does he deserve to have a wifebun after all these years being the outsider? i so want to do the best for him even though it would kill me to hand him over but if i thought the perfect home was out there i would. The stress of this is making me ill worrying about him.
 
my husband says that although our situation isnt perfect he could be somewhere alot worse - but would he be better in a hutch with a loving wifebun instead of hiding under a box all day - he does get groomed by the others though - am i over reacting, reading too much into it or does Cody just like more security of under a box as he has always liked being inside a box or a wee rabbit tent or something. Should i take the box away to encourage him to engage with the others more??
 
Awww this must be really heartbreaking for you :cry:

I really don't know what to advise as I'm not that experienced but I couldn't just 'read and run', I hope you find a solution that's best for both you and Cody.

Would it be possible to house him separately from the other two and find him his own wife bunny for him to bond with? At least then he'd have a friend. Not sure how this would work with all of the rabbits free ranging in your house though, it would probably involve keeping them separate until you can try to bond your other two with Cody and his new wife.

I'm sure there will be someone along with some good advice soon xx
 
Hi :wave: Is it possible Cody might not be 100% healthwise? I say this as a trio slave and everytime I notice my dominant female lording it over my other girl it usually means she's getting poorly (she has a few health issues). She will in turn hide away and seem not to want to be part of the three. At other times they will all snuggle together.
 
Hi :wave: Is it possible Cody might not be 100% healthwise? I say this as a trio slave and everytime I notice my dominant female lording it over my other girl it usually means she's getting poorly (she has a few health issues). She will in turn hide away and seem not to want to be part of the three. At other times they will all snuggle together.

I've noticed this in groups too. Definitely worth getting Cody health-checked, just to be sure. Also, what we humans interpret as 'fear' is often just being submissive to a dominant bun, which is the natural order of things. If you say there is grooming going on and interaction, then I'm not sure I'd do anything different. Sounds to me like Cody is a shy bunny anyway and is happy to be in the company of other buns rather than forming a strong one-to-one bond.
 
Thanks guys, never thought of him being ill, i will defo take him to the vet tomorrow to get him checked over - i soo want to do the right thing for HIM. I do love him and hate seeing him hide away. Will get a full vet check on him and even get bloods done too to cover all bases. Thanks guys.
 
Would it really not be an option to get him a gentle female bun about the same age? I understand even though it seems such a terrible shame, about you not wanting to have any more rabbits when yours have all gone, but as Oliver is only 3, you potentially have still got a lot of bunny years, and so would it really be such a bad thing to get a Cody a partner that he can really be happy with.

You obviously love him very much, but because of his age and if he is a very timid, nervy bun he might end up spending the rest of his life in rescue, and would you be happy with that, and even if he does go to a new home, I think it might be harder to switch off from worrying about him then you think, I know it would always be on mind even if subconsciously.

I think he definitely needs to be separated from the other 2, especially if he is being bullied. Even I'm feeling really sorry for the little guy now, having just lost his partner, being bullied by the female, and maybe even then being returned to rescue, where he is no doubt going to spend a lot of time in a hutch then wouldn't he?
 
Firstly, agree about getting him vet checked - always a good idea just to rule any health issues out.

Secondly, I would go with your instinct. If you really feel that he is hiding from the other two because he is not happy, especially if his appetite is affected, then I would seriously think about removing him from the group, as RogerRabbit suggested.

Is there anywhere else within your house where he could live, even if the space is limited, to see how he behaves on his own? If there is an instant change and he displays signs of being more relaxed, increased appetite etc., at least then you would know the cause.

I really feel for you, my trio's bond has just broken down completely after a year of being together. It is heartbreaking and so difficult to deal with the "fall-out" and try to do the right thing for everybun xxx
 
Since I last posted I took Cody to the vet to get bloods taken. The usual rabbit vet I go to had went home eventhough I was booked in with him - turns out receptionist made a mistake a mistake and booked me in with new vet. I interrogated him and he said he worked alot with exotics so I decided to let him take blood from codes neck. After putting the needle in several times (thankfully they used numbing cream) he couldnt get any blood . I just felt this isnt fair on cody and said to stop and that I would bring him back in a week to get my own vet to take blood. I just didn't have much confidence in him after not getting blood but most importantly I was concerned about stressing my son. Anyhow I decided to rearrange the bunnies living area in my kitchen to give them more space (they r free range but I axded in more carpet area for them to lie on) and I am please to say things have improved loads. All three now snuggle together alot with lots more grooming by everyone. All 3 were lying together when i came home from work. I think cody was just more jumpy for some reason and the extra bunny space has improved this plus cody still has his wee box that he likes to sleep under or for security plus he is eatting normal again so no vet trip required. I am loads happier now. I so want to do my best for my babies and rehoming felt like a last resort but I guess I panicked but I knew deep down I could never give him up. There is usually a solution that can be tried and glad mine has worked. I
 
Hi nickybunny1,
I'm sorry to read you have been having a stressful time since loosing Lance, the dynamics of a group can change when one of the group is no longer there, and i know it is so worrying to think one of your buns is unhappy. I'm glad things seem to be settling down. I think sometimes in the heat of the moment, or during stress we can panic and we just want the stress to end so we think of solutions we wouldn't normally even consider. I hope things stay settled with Cody, I don't want to influence you but I think it would be sad for Cody if he lost you too.
Sending you hugs xxx
 
Thanks for ur kind words karen's. In my panic my rehoming thoughts were only to make code happy but I could never have went through with it, ever, I would have thought of a solution but so glad they r still gettin on well now, lots of sunnling together. Yes the dynamic hhas changed since loosing my lance as cody is coming out of his shell more even though it was cody who sorta gave lance issues at times. Miss my boy sooooo much, its still so painful.
 
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