Bonding Worries

Hi
I am bonding my old man bunny for the third time as he has outlived his two previous partners. Both times before he has bonded fairly easily - the first one I'm pretty sure he was the dominant bun but the second was a fairly even match and they were very happy together.
This third bun has now arrived and she is a little cutie - so cheeky and self-assured but the bonding is not going well so far. Both of the previous times I had it very easy - they were bonded within a couple of days and living together within the week but this has been entirely different.....
On day 1 we divided Benjamin's run in half and placed an old hutch inside his indoor shed area and have been rotating the bunnies round every day - so each day they take a different half of the divided run and each night they swap between being in the hutch or the shed. On that first day they had a sniff through the bars only and it was an instant dislike....Benjamin was quite territorial and was grunting and trying to dig through the bars and the other rabbit - Sugar Plum was fighting back too.

On day 2 the fighting and grunting had stopped and there was an air of indifference - they were ignoring each other completely...thought this was a good sign so I put them on neutral territory together - big mistake though as a fight started immediately so took them back to their runs.

On day 3 they appeared indifferent again so tried them in the bath and Benjamin sat very still and low with his head bowed while Sugar Plum ate the treats, she approached him and bit his face and he ignored the first two but then retaliated on the third and a tussle started.

The same thing has happened now on days 4 and 5 - he sits low and still and she approaches and bites him until he bites back.

Is there hope???? I know this is still early and I'm really pleased to have seen the change in Benjamin that he started vicious and has stopped instigating the attacks but is it just a waiting game to see whether Sugar Plum will stop biting him? Is he waiting to be groomed by her which she won't indulge in - is this a tussle for power? I'm really confused by the signs being given by both of them. I've got the time to wait and see how it goes but I would rather have a sign soon if I can that there is hope for them because it's already going to be so hard to give Sugar Plum back so I'd hate to get even more attached to her but the bottom line is that we need a new mate

....for Benjamin. Any advice from experienced bonders will be gratefully received!
Rebecca xxx

Is Sugar plum neutered and are you sure it is a girl? If the answer is yes then I would think it's just a matter of time. Normally it works much better on neutral territory. Do you know anything about her past? Ot has Benjamin got any health problems. Lots of things to consider and I wish you success.

Yes Sugar Plum is female and neutered. She has been tried to pair before but it didn't work out so was returned to the rescue.
Benjamin is starting with cataracts but that is his only health problem, otherwise he is fit and healthy.
We have lots of neutral territory as the rabbits are outdoor so most of the house is scent-free but have been using the bathtub as it's easier to dive on them when the fights start.

I'm not sure of the right way to go really. Have you got a spare room where you can leave them semi unattended but listening out where she can come round on her own. It may take a longish time but if you don't interfere too much it might sort itself out. Benjamin sounds as though he isn't aggressive but he will probably stand up for himself if she gets too nasty.She might feel too restricted in a small space - I think some rabbits like more room where they feel safer. Some rabbits are quite nervous indoors and cope better outside. Have you a safe garden they can be left all day in. Run out of ideas!

I don't think it is safe to leave them alone together yet as she seems to start with the biting and then he retaliates and if I don't step in at that point it turns into a full scale nasty fight - the kind where you can't separate them! I tried them on the patio this morning as that's neutral but as soon as sugar-plum had got her bearings she went for Benjamin. I think he would really like to be groomed by her and if she was willing he's ready for a truce but she definitely doesn't want to be grooming him! I'm quite anxious about it all :-(

tbh thats not sounding great - I have bonded lots of buns and very generally speaking if they start out where one constantly dives at the other they can quickly get into an aggressor/bullied scenario until the bullied one snaps and starts lunging first to defend themself.

Have you tried bundling them into a carry crate and taking them for a drive? (have a companion with you with gloves on just in case they fight in the carry crate; though once in the car I have never known two buns fight). The idea is to make them 'cling together' and share the stressfull situation - this can then breakdown barriers they have started to build.

Its usually my last resort -

I just had another little try....don't want to rush them but I need to know whether it's going to happen soon and this time wasn't good either - tried them in the spare room - again another neutral area and again Benjamin laid straight down on the floor with his head bowed and Sugar Plum explored but as soon as she had got her bearings she went to bit his face and he put up with it once but then lashed out the second time and she was quick to pounce back at him :-( I think he's resigned himself to having a new mate now but I just don't think Sugar Plum likes him or particularly wants to be bonded - she's such a happy girl on her own and she loves human company but possibly not that of another rabbit. I'll have to wait til the weekend to try the car idea but what happens once you take them out of the car - do you then let them out in neutral area and hope this has helped them learn to trust each other? I'd just be worried that as soon as they calmed down they would be back to the biting :-(

rebeccaemms said:

I just had another little try....don't want to rush them but I need to know whether it's going to happen soon and this time wasn't good either - tried them in the spare room - again another neutral area and again Benjamin laid straight down on the floor with his head bowed and Sugar Plum explored but as soon as she had got her bearings she went to bit his face and he put up with it once but then lashed out the second time and she was quick to pounce back at him :-( I think he's resigned himself to having a new mate now but I just don't think Sugar Plum likes him or particularly wants to be bonded - she's such a happy girl on her own and she loves human company but possibly not that of another rabbit. I'll have to wait til the weekend to try the car idea but what happens once you take them out of the car - do you then let them out in neutral area and hope this has helped them learn to trust each other? I'd just be worried that as soon as they calmed down they would be back to the biting :-(

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I take them out for 30 mins or more (lots of roundabouts if possible) then put them back in a neutral area and wait - I sometimes repeat several times. If they have (as planned) been huddlig together during the trip they will by then smell of each other which also helps.

Eventually they should have learnt to trust each other . . .

however if this does not work after a couple of times I would actually give up.