Once I feel up to it, I'll definitely write his story. Right now I'm not doing so well. It takes all the strength I have to get out of bed in the morning. I still don't want to eat, although I have tried for my mom's sake. I don't want to worry her, but there's only so much of an act I can put up. The pain is just to great to hide. Every morning the first thing I did was feed Yuki his breakfast. Then I would take him out of his cage for most of the day, playing with him, watching him hop around and do binkies. I couldn't take him outside much since it's winter most of the time here in Canada and it's freezing cold all the time in winter, but whenever I wasn't around to supervise him, he would go in the big wooden pen I had my dad build for him a long time ago where he had tons of room to hop.
Memories are just filling my head now. Whenever I put my face close to his, he would lean forward, twitching his nose with a smile on his face, and give me a bunny kiss. Whenever I walked into the room in the morning he would clip his teeth twice in a greeting, stand up on his hind legs, then start hopping wildly in his cage. He was always so happy, even when he wasn't feeling well. The fact I will never see him do these cute things again has me so down I can barely function. I take the medication my doctor prescribed me that helps me sleep, and I try to sleep as much as possible to avoid feeling this way all the time. I know I can only avoid it for so long, but while the pain and grief is so fresh, it's all I can do to get by.