• Forum/Server Upgrade If you are reading this you have made it to the upgraded forum. Posts made on the old forum after 26th October 2023 have not been transfered. Everything else should be here. If you find any issues please let us know.

Dilemma, what to do - updated

kayjay

Warren Veteran
As some of you know I have fibromyalgia and recently I've taken a turn for the worse (I haven't been around as much cos of this). Something's happening inside my body which isn't good, I'm in a lot of pain especially in my feet so walking, driving and even standing are painful :( And I'm constantly exhausted, really really exhausted :(

I've been able to maintain giving my rabbits and two guineapigs adequate care but it's far from ideal. They get fed, greens, hay and litter trays changed every other day but that's it and I've been struggling more and more to clean them out. My OH has suggested rehoming Teddy and Jemima so I can give Pippa and MJ the care they deserve and Teddy is such a friendly rabbit he really needs an environment where he can roam freely more and I can't give him that here.

I took Teddy on as he was going to be pts otherwise and adopted Jemima from Kayj. I've pm'd Kay and she would be happy to rehome them both together as they are bonded should I decide to give them up.

So what do I do??? Do I continue struggling giving them 'adequate' care or do I rehome my two lovely rabbits so I can give Pippa and MJ better care (and room). The guineapigs are my sons so they have to stay but I'm going to rope him into helping more as like all kids he gives them about 5 mins attention a week.

Any advice welcomed

Thanks, Kathryn xx
 
Last edited:
I think it's best that you give your rabbits away. It doesn't sound like your situation will improve and you have to think of yourself aswell. You will be giving them to someone you know and who has some experience of rabbits so you know they will be looked after well, and perhaps you can visit or have them visit you too. Then, you can give your guinea pigs more attention and presumably better quality attention. It sounds to be like it would be to everyone's advantage.
 
Kathryn I will help you in anyway I can and will back you with whatever you decide as if anyone puts the best interests of the animals first it is definately you. If you do decide to give them back then I cannot thank you enough for showing Jemima what a reaslly loving home is. Take care and you know where I am.:wave:
 
Oh no Kathryn, I'm sorry to hear the fibromyalgia has got worse, poor you :(

What's the diagnosis likely to be like long term? If your health may improve then maybe you might want to consider fostering them out for a few months?

Otherwise, don't feel guilty about rehoming them, it does sound like it is very difficult for you. I'm sure they are happy with 'adequate' (which lets face it is much better than many rabbits get) but ultimately you need to think about yourself.

xx
 
Kathryn I will help you in anyway I can and will back you with whatever you decide as if anyone puts the best interests of the animals first it is definately you. If you do decide to give them back then I cannot thank you enough for showing Jemima what a reaslly loving home is. Take care and you know where I am.:wave:

Thanks Kay xx
 
You know what will happen if they come back Karen & I will be squabbling over who is going to have them:lol: :lol: :lol:
 
You know what will happen if they come back Karen & I will be squabbling over who is going to have them:lol: :lol: :lol:

Well I have to say that Teddy is just your sort of rabbit - he's a lovely character and wasn't Jemima one of David's favourites?
 
Awww - sorry to hear you're in pain :( I would say my rabbits are perfectly happy and seem perfectly healthy (touch wood) and I don't clean their trays every other day as they seem to do most of their toileting on the patio, so I just sweep the patio once a day and pour disinfectant on the puddles of wee. The girls in the shed have 2 enormous trays (18"x2foot) which I change every 8 days, having put fresh hay in daily (there's about 3" of hay covering it all by the end which filters all the wee down and the top stays dry as they rake fresh over it every day) and Benny with same sized tray only needs changing once every 10 days. Maa uses the patio a lot but also goes in her hutch :roll: Even so she only needs a clean out every 10 days as I put fresh megazorb on top and hay - no smells and no flies.

As for other stuff - my routine is easy with the rabbits (guinea pigs are another matter with 19 :roll: ) breakfast pellets at 8.30am, water for shed bunnies, sweep patio, let shed bunnies out 9 - 9.45 - get them hay at lock-up. Let Maa out, put fresh litter on her wee corner, get her water, get Benny's water and hay and give them both a few dandelion leaves for a treat - Maa goes in for fresh hay at 10.45 and Benny comes out till I remember to shut his hutch - he puts himself back in after half an hour for poopy eating time. Sweep and disinfect patio. Morning finished! Pig cleaning time.
Veggies at 5-ish for pigs - just greens for rabbits. Let the shed bunnies out for an hour - carrots and brocolli at lock-up. Let Maa out for an hour - ditto with veg - let Benny out for an hour - same veg at lock up.
Supper pellets, water and hay at 9-ish.

It's more work keeping the house clean really - which is why it resembles a pig-sty :roll: But the animals are happy :D My firm belief is they need a secure home for life, fresh hay, food and exercise daily more than they need cleaning out every day and cuddles, because change is the one thing that does make them suffer.
 
elve - yes you're right they do need stability and tbh they are happy enough even though Teddy chucks his ball around when he wants to come out more. It's more my pain that's the problem at the moment and I guess the guilt of knowing I'm not doing as much as I could

I'm not a 'routine' gal but maybe life would be easier if I was
 
elve - yes you're right they do need stability and tbh they are happy enough even though Teddy chucks his ball around when he wants to come out more. It's more my pain that's the problem at the moment and I guess the guilt of knowing I'm not doing as much as I could

I'm not a 'routine' gal but maybe life would be easier if I was

I'm no good at routines either and I have no stamina, which is why I went to bed at 1am last night :roll: I had to grasp at some kind of routine when I got all the pigs as it was impossible otherwise, but I hate it with a passion (stamps foot and cries 'shan't!' :lol: ) 'Happy enough' animals are lucky animals in my opinion - I have wanted to take a break from this nightmare of endless chores many times, but I guess I am too proud and stubborn to admit defeat :) As long as my animals are 'happy enough' I'm happy - I look at all my pigs munching hay contentedly at bedtime and think 'wow - we've survived another day!' - I literelly have to take it a day at a time or I'd break. I had to go to bed at 1am last night because I couldn't walk another step at 10.30, having cleaned all day, so piggies supper waited till midnight. I pace myself now - I used to try and be superwoman when I first got the pigs but I nearly died of exhaustion :?
 
Sorry to hear you are in pain.:cry:

I agree with elve.:D I got too many buns for them to get much loving - but they have each other. I concentrate my attention on the single fosters or sick buns. Out of my bonded 13, I would say most "tolerate" me, a couple hate me & only 3 love me (Alex, Flint & Alfie:D ). As for cleaning - you can only do the best you can do. I read on here about moving hutches & disinfecting this & that. I clean litter trays daily, sweep up alternate days & move stuff/disinfect once a month:oops:

I've never wished I didn't have so many - but some days I do think it won't ever end:lol: (it's the pancuring i swear!:lol: )

Good luck with whatever you decide:D
 
Kathryn it's only my opinion, and you have to make a decision that suits you, but I think the rabbits would be best staying with you, they are quite happy just being together with the other rabbits, and won't suffer if you cannot give them lots of attention. They know you are there for them and you are doing a fantastic job at the moment with your illness.

Obviously everyone will be behind you in whatever you decide. xx
 
Oh I'm sorry Kathryn to hear that you have been worse recently. It's the strangest thing - I was going to PM you and ask how you were as I haven't noticed you around so much recently.

My CFS has been bad recently too, I'm really no use doing anything with Rosie (except cuddling her :) ) - Rob has to do all her cleaning out, as well as work full time to support us and do all the housework, so I really identify with your situation.

I'm sure Teddy and Jemima are perfectly happy - they have each other and as long as they are being well cared for (which they are) then I'm sure they are quite content. However, if you're struggling to clean them out, that's a big drain on your energy. I guess only you can really decide what to do - sorry not much help :oops: But if you did decide you had to rehome them, you obviously have Kay behind you 100% and I'm sure they would get a great home if that was the case.

One of the reasons we are thinking of getting a husbun for Rosie is so that she doesn't rely on me so much for company - even that is exhausting at times :(

Sorry, don't mean to drag my own circumstances into your post - it's just that I can just really identify with your dilemma :(

PM me anytime you want to offload :)
 
Thanks Helen, it's so frustrating isn't it :evil: David won't clean them out as he never wanted animals in the first place - he's not being horrid and obviously if I died he'd have to clean them out ;) but it was my decision to get them and he's not into any sort of pets at all and he does do everything else to support us financially and most of the housework etc
 
Im really sorry to hear your condition has worsened.....your not on your own in making such a decision, I have been contacted by a lady suffering from the same thing and she has had to make the heatbreaking decision to rehome her rabbits as she can no longer tend to their needs.

I think whats important is acgieveing a balance betwen your needs and the needs of the rabbits. No-one leads a perfect lifestyle, human or animal, what matters is weather it is a happy and healthy one.
 
Go with your gut instinct. If you feel it wqould be better for YOU as much as them then don't feel guilty on taking up KayJ on her kind offer.No need to struggle on if its too much for you.
Equally, if you are just feeling guilty that they don't get much "attention" then don't. Rabbits really aren't that bothered about us humans so long as we keep them well fed and clean and they have another rabbit to play with :D
Do what you feel is right and don't feel bad about it.
 
I think whats important is acgieveing a balance betwen your needs and the needs of the rabbits. No-one leads a perfect lifestyle, human or animal, what matters is weather it is a happy and healthy one.

I do agree with that - I busted a gut when I first got the pigs, trying to be perfect, and after a year I was just knackered, ill and depressed - it was like they have needs, but I don't? So now if I need a break instead of feeling guilty (well I try not to!) I tell myself my needs are not only as important as theirs but also I actually have greater needs than they do - All they want is a simple life. Whereas I want the moon, preferably with brass knobs on and sugar-coated :lol: I also remind myself that, like raising my son (a job I confess I don't enjoy at all) it won't last forever - I'm here for them as long as they need me, and I'm determined to do my duty and be loyal, but boy do I have plans :rolleyes:
 
I do agree with that - I busted a gut when I first got the pigs, trying to be perfect, and after a year I was just knackered, ill and depressed - it was like they have needs, but I don't? So now if I need a break instead of feeling guilty (well I try not to!) I tell myself my needs are not only as important as theirs but also I actually have greater needs than they do - All they want is a simple life. Whereas I want the moon, preferably with brass knobs on and sugar-coated :lol: I also remind myself that, like raising my son (a job I confess I don't enjoy at all) it won't last forever - I'm here for them as long as they need me, and I'm determined to do my duty and be loyal, but boy do I have plans :rolleyes:

I think it's better for the owner and the pets for the pets to be rehomed in some circumstances, rather than the owner soldiering on, becoming uphappy and ill because they feel guilty at giving them up.
 
I think it's better for the owner and the pets for the pets to be rehomed in some circumstances, rather than the owner soldiering on, becoming uphappy and ill because they feel guilty at giving them up.

But the guilt doesn't go away. I have been unhappy and ill and I have soldiered on and I know I would have regretted it if I'd got rid of the animals simply because I would have felt like I'd failed them. My ex used to ask why didn't I get rid of them if I was so miserable, but in the same way why not put my son into care? He's certainly made me miserable! To which he'd say 'you didn't give birth to guinea pigs!' Fair enough I didn't give birth to them, but I made a commitment to them. The whole point in any kind of commitment is 'through good times and bad' surely? If you expect things to be easy and fun and exciting all the time you will be disappointed in life. And if you give up just because things are hard or boring you will be disappointed in yourself.

Of course if I was hospitalised I'd have no choice but give them up, which is why I've lowered my standards regarding cleaning out and housework. It hasn't affected the animals adversely to be cleaned out less and that's a fact. And for me it's made the difference between being able to keep going or having to give them up due to ill health.
 
Back
Top