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Grieving for your Rabbit
- Thread starter Beapig
- Start date
In my experience, yes, it does get easier. It becomes less raw. It doesn't suddenly, or indeed ever, become OK, but very, very gradually there is not that overwhelming feeling of drowning in sadness. I always find first thing in the morning, when I first wake up and realise what's happened, seems to be one of the worst moments, but also little things during each and every day will remind me and make me emotional. I think one of the small ways to help is to realise that the feelings are completely normal and are part of the grieving process. I also always re-live the events leading up to losing the rabbit and sometimes question decisions I have made. You're right, it is hell 
But it could be argued that this is a price of caring.
Sending lots of hugs.
But it could be argued that this is a price of caring. Sending lots of hugs.
MightyMax
Banned
Please tell me it gets easier? Today has been hell
Yes it is hell. So many things will remind you along the way, and I find that no matter how much time has passed, the sheer weirdness about them not being there any more is difficult to deal with. I mean, where did they go? Each has his or her own beliefs and sometimes this can be a healer.
I find that knowing that what happened was the only way forward, as was the case with Plumpkin, helps ease things. There's no wondering if you could have done more, because everything that could have been done was done. It was inevitable.
But to have to live through day after day, not doing the things you always did, is incredibly difficult. Knowing you will go downstairs and that face won't be there to greet you and mug you for breakfast. But solace does come in knowing they are at peace now.
Hugs for you xx
Craig 1965
Warren Veteran
Beapig, I know, in some way, what you mean, and also in some small way, how you feel.
What you have experienced and gone through is a very unique circumstance which others may also associate with but possibly not on the same scale.
Plumpkin became a big personality on the forum and her story followed by many. And so, some comfort you may possibly draw is that your grief is also shared by others - I am one of those. Sometimes, knowing and sharing grief can be helpful.
From my own perspective, I lost my soul bunny about 16 months ago. He was mourning from the loss of his wife bun 3 weeks before and he sadly left us as we were with him in the vets. For me, personally, I have not yet come to full terms. Every day is hard for me, and I am sure others who will post, will also echo this sentiment. For some, they can move on in some way, but I think for all who have felt such a connection with our special rabbit, a piece of our own heart is taken with them when they leave. It is, sadly, the price that we must pay for unconditional love.
The reason you feel the way you do, is because you are a deeply caring, deeply connected person, with values that set you apart from others. You will question if what you did was right - because you will always feel if you could have done more. Every caring responsible pet owner will feel that way. And we end up making decisions that we wish we hadn't - but we are also guided by the professional advice of vets. All we can do as pet owners is to take on board the best advice and act on it in the best welfare of our pets, and sometimes those decsions are the hardest.
We love our pets - more than anything. We would give everything we have to give our pets that extra time or to make them better.
You did that and more for Plumpkin and for that, despite how much the pain is for you, you should be immensly proud because you gave Plumpkin love, safety, comfort. Things she had not felt and whilst your grief will take time, you should draw comfort from the life you gave Plumpkin.
For me, each day is hard. My rabbits are laid to rest in our garden and I can draw comfort from that and I have the chance to feel as if they are there every day when I go past them. It doesn't mean I don't love the rabbits I now have, but I also know I cannot replace the huge personality and character that my bridge bun Ben had. And I miss that each and every day.
You will move on and it will take time and it will take as long as it needs to for you. I found some solstice through the forum - the kindness and supportive words from others helped me and contine to do so. It doesn't mean I must forget my bun, because in my mind, I don't want to. And a special rabbit is a unique gift - a gift you shared with Plumpkin. Her spirit will forever live within you and your heart as it will live on also through this forum. And there will always be comfort and support for you on this forum.
Your strength and courage are a credit to you and I wish I had words to help you more. I think you are an amazing person and you have done something truly amazing.
Sending you a huge hug Beapig. I'm sure others will also. xx
What you have experienced and gone through is a very unique circumstance which others may also associate with but possibly not on the same scale.
Plumpkin became a big personality on the forum and her story followed by many. And so, some comfort you may possibly draw is that your grief is also shared by others - I am one of those. Sometimes, knowing and sharing grief can be helpful.
From my own perspective, I lost my soul bunny about 16 months ago. He was mourning from the loss of his wife bun 3 weeks before and he sadly left us as we were with him in the vets. For me, personally, I have not yet come to full terms. Every day is hard for me, and I am sure others who will post, will also echo this sentiment. For some, they can move on in some way, but I think for all who have felt such a connection with our special rabbit, a piece of our own heart is taken with them when they leave. It is, sadly, the price that we must pay for unconditional love.
The reason you feel the way you do, is because you are a deeply caring, deeply connected person, with values that set you apart from others. You will question if what you did was right - because you will always feel if you could have done more. Every caring responsible pet owner will feel that way. And we end up making decisions that we wish we hadn't - but we are also guided by the professional advice of vets. All we can do as pet owners is to take on board the best advice and act on it in the best welfare of our pets, and sometimes those decsions are the hardest.
We love our pets - more than anything. We would give everything we have to give our pets that extra time or to make them better.
You did that and more for Plumpkin and for that, despite how much the pain is for you, you should be immensly proud because you gave Plumpkin love, safety, comfort. Things she had not felt and whilst your grief will take time, you should draw comfort from the life you gave Plumpkin.
For me, each day is hard. My rabbits are laid to rest in our garden and I can draw comfort from that and I have the chance to feel as if they are there every day when I go past them. It doesn't mean I don't love the rabbits I now have, but I also know I cannot replace the huge personality and character that my bridge bun Ben had. And I miss that each and every day.
You will move on and it will take time and it will take as long as it needs to for you. I found some solstice through the forum - the kindness and supportive words from others helped me and contine to do so. It doesn't mean I must forget my bun, because in my mind, I don't want to. And a special rabbit is a unique gift - a gift you shared with Plumpkin. Her spirit will forever live within you and your heart as it will live on also through this forum. And there will always be comfort and support for you on this forum.
Your strength and courage are a credit to you and I wish I had words to help you more. I think you are an amazing person and you have done something truly amazing.
Sending you a huge hug Beapig. I'm sure others will also. xx
jewaller
Alpha Buck
dear zoobec/beapig,-try to not turn the grieving inward,-that is bad,-I lost my son 5-25-2018,cousin the day before,-my mother 11-15-2018,-these are things that happen,i donot take any death lightly,--I have over the years had many critters pass on--and fought to stay busy--this seems to help-short term,but I definitely have my moments,-my last bun-[bdenium]was 13 yrs.old-past 9-24-2018,-my solice is with this website helps try and help others with their buns..they taught me a lot..-sincerely james waller from the other kent usa
This is very good advice, I should have said this is what I find in the beginning, it will get easier in time. I’m sorry you have gone through such sorrow James
xx
loobers25
Warren Veteran
Hi Beapig, first of all I would like to say how deeply sad and sorry I am for your loss of Plumpkin. When I saw your thread I cried for you both
When I lost my Toby I honestly felt like I actually didn't want to be here anymore because the grief was that unbearable. I remember Zoobec writing to me and saying that it will get easier and thinking how will I ever get over this. I can say that Zoobec and Mr Frostith where right . It does get better in time. I still have hurty tears and pain my heart now and then but mostly I remember the fun times. I hope you don't mind me suggesting that maybe you could send your case with pictures to the RWAF? I was thinking perhaps they could be used in future dental features or perhaps cpd as plumpkin had such an interesting case and help others. I have been taking a break from the forum but did not want to read and run. Lots of love to you. The forum really helped me In times of bunny grief so please always talk to everybun here if you need to. Lots of love to you all xxx
When I lost my Toby I honestly felt like I actually didn't want to be here anymore because the grief was that unbearable. I remember Zoobec writing to me and saying that it will get easier and thinking how will I ever get over this. I can say that Zoobec and Mr Frostith where right . It does get better in time. I still have hurty tears and pain my heart now and then but mostly I remember the fun times. I hope you don't mind me suggesting that maybe you could send your case with pictures to the RWAF? I was thinking perhaps they could be used in future dental features or perhaps cpd as plumpkin had such an interesting case and help others. I have been taking a break from the forum but did not want to read and run. Lots of love to you. The forum really helped me In times of bunny grief so please always talk to everybun here if you need to. Lots of love to you all xxx
bunny momma
Wise Old Thumper
Well said. I can only add my condolences on your loss.
I've read all of your comments and honestly appreciate the support so much.
I was feeling extremely raw yesterday. Holding her for the last time before I buried her was very hard. Seeing Beatrice trying to find her and sitting on her own all day has been even harder. I think that Plumpkin and Beatrice had an unbreakable bond - they were like sisters. Beatrice still has Hamilton, but they haven't been snuggling together at all. Seeing Beatrice in the litter tray her and Plumpkin used to snuggle in every day, but all on her own, is really really sad to me. Particularly as I don't know what it going through her little head and I can't explain to her what has happened. I hope that Jellybean, when bonded with Bea, will bring her that sisterly comfort. Although I'm a bit sceptical, because Plumps was gentle as a lamb and Jelly is rather more like Beatrice with a feisty spirit. I hope they don't clash!
I don't have the time to respond to all of your individual comments this morning, but I want you to know that I read them all and that they bring me huge comfort. So thank you so much.
I was feeling extremely raw yesterday. Holding her for the last time before I buried her was very hard. Seeing Beatrice trying to find her and sitting on her own all day has been even harder. I think that Plumpkin and Beatrice had an unbreakable bond - they were like sisters. Beatrice still has Hamilton, but they haven't been snuggling together at all. Seeing Beatrice in the litter tray her and Plumpkin used to snuggle in every day, but all on her own, is really really sad to me. Particularly as I don't know what it going through her little head and I can't explain to her what has happened. I hope that Jellybean, when bonded with Bea, will bring her that sisterly comfort. Although I'm a bit sceptical, because Plumps was gentle as a lamb and Jelly is rather more like Beatrice with a feisty spirit. I hope they don't clash!
I don't have the time to respond to all of your individual comments this morning, but I want you to know that I read them all and that they bring me huge comfort. So thank you so much.
MightyMax
Banned
I understand how this feels for you, and I have seen it with my own rabbits.
Sending hugs xx
susie bun
Wise Old Thumper
Losing a rabbit that has been such a big part of your life is bound to be hard, but from my own experience memories of a late rabbit do come to be a source of not only comfort but even a source of happiness in time. My first rabbit, Spenser, was a single house rabbit and lived in my bedroom, and I felt the absence of a furry companion deeply. My life came back into focus when I adopted my new friend, Bertie. I never considered him a replacement for Spenser, but love him equally and have so enjoyed getting to know his own personality.
One thing that did help me in the bleak weeks between Spenser and Bertie was knowing that letting Spenser go when I did truly was an act of love.
Bertie bunny and I send love to you all. xx
One thing that did help me in the bleak weeks between Spenser and Bertie was knowing that letting Spenser go when I did truly was an act of love.
Bertie bunny and I send love to you all. xx
Thank you for writing this Susie Bun, I have found it very comforting indeed.
I am already thinking to look out for another rabbit to rescue, which makes me feel very conflicted. I know that replacing Plumpkin is impossible, and that isn't what I want to do at all. But since she has been gone, almost a week now, I feel like one of my greatest purposes in life has floated away with her. I used to feed her homemade smoothies around the clock, take her to so many dentals, give her medication all of the time - I was her constant carer and I was really happy for that to be my role.
It's obvious that I am also relieved to not have to watch her suffer anymore and not to have the burden of constantly wondering if she's in pain. But throughout the past year I also built a beautiful friendship with her and felt proud that I helped her to gain weight, experience living with other rabbits - live a much more natural and happy life compared to that of the tiny hutch she was living in.
I suppose what I'm saying is that if I see another rabbit who is crying out for help, I have room in my heart and my home to rescue another. Plumpkin really has made me realise that I want caring for rabbits who need my help to be a big part of my life in the long run. I hope that she knows any other rabbits I take in are not replacements for her - I am helping more rabbits in her memory.
