Stalemate in bonding process of a trio. Any advice?

I'm hoping to finally get my single bun Timmy bonded with my established pair Max and Charlotte. For those who don't know I first tried to bond them into a quad 3 months ago with Timmy's bonded partner Mimi, which unfortunately I had to stop because Mimi was getting bullied and as she was old and in her last weeks I decided it was kinder to let her live out her life with Timmy who adored her.

After sadly losing Mimi about 6 weeks ago I wanted to bond Timmy with my other pair Max and Charlotte, but he needed a dental first, then came down with an ear infection so bonding has been paused for a few weeks.

I now have some time off work and Timmy has recovered so I started trying to bond them again yesterday. I did all day yesterday then seperated them over night as I didn't want to rush Timmy, but as no bun seemed overly upset yesterday I've decided to keep them together overnight tonight to try and get it progressing as much as possible.

The good news is there's no actual fighting, but Max and Charlotte will grunt and lunge at Timmy when he gets too close which has been going on for 2 days now. He is definitely able to get nearer to them now than at the start and Max and Charlottes lunges are half hearted now too. But he just tried to groom Charlotte and she saw him off, so he went over to Max to do the same and he saw him off too :roll: I feel like it's never ending! Thank goodness for my sweet patient Timmy, he just trots off instead of fighting back

This is them right now, able to eat hay next to eachother seemingly happily...



Any words of wisdom on how to get the ball rolling a bit more, or should I just let things progress how they are?

Frustrated!

I don't know very much about rabbits at all but based on advice I decided against a trio. I have 2 girls who are litter mates and get on great... then I adopted Ted and got him castrated with the intention of bonding him with the 2 girls but I was told that it could cause the girls to fall out so ive decided to get another female rabbit and try to bond her with Ted and leave my two girls as a twosome!! Its such a shame that I have to get another rabbit for Ted to have a wife :lol:

Niklovesrats said:

I don't know very much about rabbits at all but based on advice I decided against a trio. I have 2 girls who are litter mates and get on great... then I adopted Ted and got him castrated with the intention of bonding him with the 2 girls but I was told that it could cause the girls to fall out so ive decided to get another female rabbit and try to bond her with Ted and leave my two girls as a twosome!! Its such a shame that I have to get another rabbit for Ted to have a wife :lol:

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See although I would love to get another rabbit, it's not really an option for me financially or emotionally now. The 4 buns used to be the responsibility of me and my ex but after we broke up he slowly died a death on that front so now they're solely my responsibility. They're all over the age of 7 so various health issues have developed, and I lost my Mimi a short while ago as I said. It's all a bit much for both my heart and my wallet and is taking it's toll on my busy life.

Saying that Timmy is a very sociable and loving bun, so I HAVE to make this work out. I am optimistic as they're all calm in eachothers company and will flop near to eachother. I just can't wait for the lunges to stop and grooming to begin to reassure me that Timmy won't be either bullied or alone for the rest of his life.

I had this with Boo who would lunge, chase & pull fur from newcomer Mouse though she was never vicious . Joey fortunately took to Mouse straight away. I don't feel the risk of your existing pair falling out is great. TBH I think its mainly about patience, my trio took forever, I'd stick with it. Your Timmy & my Mouse may be world apart in size & looks but their peace loving refusal to fight is just the same

joey&boo said:

I had this with Boo who would lunge, chase & pull fur from newcomer Mouse though she was never vicious . Joey fortunately took to Mouse straight away. I don't feel the risk of your existing pair falling out is great. TBH I think its mainly about patience, my trio took forever, I'd stick with it. Your Timmy & my Mouse may be world apart in size & looks but their peace loving refusal to fight is just the same

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Thanks joey&boo. Yeh I'm not worried about my established pair, they're a strong couple and have fortunately shown no aggression atall towards eachother *TOUCHES WOOD*

It's just poor Timmy getting left out or grunted at

Gemmapookie said:

Thanks joey&boo. Yeh I'm not worried about my established pair, they're a strong couple and have fortunately shown no aggression atall towards eachother *TOUCHES WOOD*

It's just poor Timmy getting left out or grunted at

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its so sad when one bun is left out but they should get there, I really hope so. I know you'll be monitoring Timmy closely anyway

joey&boo said:

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its so sad when one bun is left out but they should get there, I really hope so. I know you'll be monitoring Timmy closely anyway

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I'm watching Timmy like a hawk. He didn't get as much food at breakfast as the others which was always my worry because they eat so much faster than him. I gave him extra when he had his medicine though and will continue to do so if I think he's not getting enough.

Our night was *reasonably* peaceful. I heard a few grunts then Timmy hopping off but nothing I had to get involved with. At 3am Max decided he wanted to escape the pen, then went on a grunting mission when I stopped him. This is nothing to do with the bond or Timmy, it's just what Max does when he doesn't get his own way :roll:

This morning they've just been hanging out. Charlotte still occasionally grunts at H&M when he's near her face but Max seems to have almost stopped now. Hopefully they're getting bored of it. I'm fed up of cleaning up every pee with kitchen roll so I, going to have a clear up in a minute and put a large litter tray in, see how they get on.

Wish me and Timmy luck :wave:

Good luck - it sounds like it is edging in the right direction

joey&boo said:

Good luck - it sounds like it is edging in the right direction

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Sloooooooooowly! :roll::lol:

Thankyou :wave:

Fingers crossed for you - and Timmy xx

GAH, this is SO frustrating!!

Charlotte is STILL nipping and lunging at Timmy if he gets too close to her. We've literally not progressed anywhere from yesterday morning except Max has groomed Timmy for like a minute, once :roll: Max and Timmy are mostly OK I think, Max chases him when there's food around and has humped him a few times but he does that to Charlotte anyway, it's just Max. I literally have no idea how to crack Charlotte though, it seems to be her automatic response to be aggressive to Timmy :evil:

I slept in my bedroom last night which is right next to theirs, with the door open and had to run in a few times to stop poor Timmy getting chased by Charlotte, I'm sure he's totally fed up of it as am I.

Where do I go from here?

aww, missed this. Hows the bunnies this morning ? x

Much the same to be honest. Charlotte is still lunging at and sometimes nipping Timmy. I had to get up about 5 times in the night to diffuse the situation as she can get herself into a right tizzy. It seemed a bit worse last night for some reason Max and Timmy are still OK, happy to be near eachother, will sit and eat hay together and there's been some grooming although sometimes Charlotte causing trouble winds Max up too :roll:

It really is so frustrating for all concerned. I was hoping to increase their space a bit today because Max is SO bored in their pen and trying to get out, but I just don't feel Charlotte is ready yet. I really wish I could explain to her how much better it would be for all of them if she'd just BE NICE to Timmy!

Much the same to be honest. Charlotte is still lunging at and sometimes nipping Timmy. I had to get up about 5 times in the night to diffuse the situation as she can get herself into a right tizzy. It seemed a bit worse last night for some reason Max and Timmy are still OK, happy to be near eachother, will sit and eat hay together and there's been some grooming although sometimes Charlotte causing trouble winds Max up too :roll:

It really is so frustrating for all concerned. I was hoping to increase their space a bit today because Max is SO bored in their pen and trying to get out, but I just don't feel Charlotte is ready yet. I really wish I could explain to her how much better it would be for all of them if she'd just BE NICE to Timmy!

that is one of the problems with bunnies, they won't listen to reason. I wish I could speed up the process, seems you just can't hurry love in the bunny world. Remember the greatest things in life are not the things that come easily. It will be so worth it

Mind you as long as it took Boo, if my parents had plonked another woman / man in to mine & OH's life & relationship I'd probably resisted even longer :lol:

Its awkward that Timmy is such a wee poppet (unless he is really fast & agile because of it), as I was saying yesterday it was a blessing Mouse could outrun any chases so bigger space wasn't a problem. Do you get the feeling a lunge could become a bite ?

joey&boo said:

that is one of the problems with bunnies, they won't listen to reason. I wish I could speed up the process, seems you just can't hurry love in the bunny world. Remember the greatest things in life are not the things that come easily. It will be so worth it

Mind you as long as it took Boo, if my parents had plonked another woman / man in to mine & OH's life & relationship I'd probably resisted even longer :lol:

Its awkward that Timmy is such a wee poppet (unless he is really fast & agile because of it), as I was saying yesterday it was a blessing Mouse could outrun any chases so bigger space wasn't a problem. Do you get the feeling a lunge could become a bite ?

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I think a lunge has the potential to turn nasty, she's certainly pulled out a few tufts of his fur He is agile but not sure he could outrun her. I just don't want to expand their space and it make her even worse :?

Gemmapookie said:

I think a lunge has the potential to turn nasty, she's certainly pulled out a few tufts of his fur He is agile but not sure he could outrun her. I just don't want to expand their space and it make her even worse :?

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I'd say trusting your instincts is the best thing you can do xx

Hello to anyone keeping up with this thread :wave:

So I seperated them yesterday to give them (and me!) a break for a day and night because we were all so tired. We're back on it again now. Charlotte still hasn't calmed down overly, she still lunges at Timmy every time he passes her, and will nip if he gets too close. The night before last I had to get up 5 times to go and break up scuffles, well not scuffles just Charlotte chasing Timmy around and pulling fur :evil: I've found that if I leave her to it she gets herself into a total rage, so I try and stop it before it even starts.

I am coming to the end of my tether with it to be honest. I've no idea where to go from here. Its especially frustrating because Max and Timmy are doing good and I can see that Timmys happy about that

Any words of wisdom or encouragment greatly appreciated x

It's a shame Charlotte isn't settling when I was quad bonding I was lucky it went well, but I was feeding piles of rosemary to them with the hay, and later read somewhere it has a calming effect, might be worth a try. I haven't tried it but I'm sure someone on here said they'd used a diffuser possibly feliway but I'm not sure ? And I think people have also used pet rescue remedy, again I've not tried it. Good luck :thumb:

I used rescue remedy + also doused myself in lavender essential oil. I'm sorry its such hard work Gemma. I don't know what to suggest really - the Rosemary sounds worth a shot. When we got fed up of the small space OH got in a huff "right I'm trying them in the bath" (with towels) - Joey jumped straight out ! Boo did groom Mouse in there but then switched to a lunge

Does Charlotte sniff Timmys poo & get angry - Boo used to do that a lot.

I think it really boils down to how long you can cope with this for. I'm guessing Timmys growing bond with Max is making the decision harder - if Mouse didn't love Joey so much I think I would have given up. Will they accept fusses from you when they are all together? My three would get in a huddle around me when I sat on the floor, they would press faces & enjoy the fuss - I think this helped & I'm sure Mouse knew why I was doing it.

How long have you been trying for now?