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Two Years Ago

Ashleigh

Alpha Buck
This photo was taken from my engagement party exactly two years ago! My beautiful Roxy was there to celebrate with us (as you can see on the photo). The girl in the photo was my previous Maid of Honour, we used to be so close, yet now we don't even speak...
I went to see where Roxy was buried for the first time last night and I broke down. I miss him so much.
Since the engagement, I had always pictured having Roxy with me on the morning of my Wedding as I get ready; he was often by my side when I would get ready in the morning so I just knew he would be there on my Wedding morning to keep me calm as I stroked his soft blue fur, yet sadly, what I had pictured before is different now...
I love that beautiful cat but as tears start up again as I write this; my lovely little Pepsi has come to me and nuzzled me, giving me little kitty kisses. It's strange to think that my little Pepsi kitty didn't even exist when this photo was taken, neither did our beautiful bunny Snow Cloud. It reminds me that life doesn't always work out the way you planned, friends change, you lose what you may have had before, things happen that you would never have imagined would but there is always a reason, no matter how awful life may seam sometimes:
There's something you must do, a type of person you're supposed to be, someone you are here for, to love, to care for, you're meant to be there for new friends, maybe for new partner's, maybe for a new family even if your old ones weren't there for you, you have to be there for them.
For me personally, even though Roxy is gone, I have my other fluffy babies to look after and I am blessed to have them in my life.
All this pain and heartache is worth it for the past I had, to make my present now and my future, everything I've ever gone through, is for a reason, it's made me who I am and it's brought certain people and certain pets into my life who I am so greatful for.
On Friday, the man I love, who I've gone through so much with is going to become my husband. Although the life of our precious fur baby ended, our life together is only just beginning.

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Whilst I do not share your views that our lives have been "planned" as such, I really admire your positivity, which is something I strongly believe in.

I am sure that Friday will be a very special day in your life and I really hope that everything goes exactly as you wish.
 
Roxy will remain in your heart, so in some way he will be able to be with you on your Wedding Day. I hope the day is all you want it to be and that you and Mr Ashleigh-to-be will have a very happy future together xx
 
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