Unsure if my rabbits are really bonded

Hello everybody,

I would appreciate some advice regarding bonding, I have grown up caring for rabbits but have never bonded a pair before. Some background information on my situation; I currently have two rabbits; a male and a female, both neutered and spayed respectively. They are both approximately 8-9 months old, but I got the male several months before I got the female. He was a very good rabbit on his own and enjoys human company and attention, he is pretty spoiled since he had the run of my apartment and didn't have any other pets to compete for attention with. I got the female when I started having to work long hours hoping that he would not be lonely, though to be honest he seemed to be doing fine on his own. The area where I live in does not have any rescue organizations where I could have taken him to sort of choose his own partner, so while I realize it is better for rabbits to choose each other that wasn't an option in this case. I kept the rabbits in separate cages right next to each other and alternated their outside time until I was able to get the female spayed, about a month after I got her. She is much less sociable than the male and generally avoids people and isn't big on being petted. After her spay surgery and recovery I started trying to bond them. I brought them to neutral spaces, and put them in the bathtub, tried stress bonding and even rubbed banana on both of their heads in attempt to warm them up to each other.

For the first several weeks whenever I started a bonding session, wherever it was, after a few moments the male would start biting at the female's hind quarters and she would thump her foot and run as far away as the space would allow. When I rubbed banana on the males face she would eat it off and then move away. The male continued biting at her hind quarters and when I introduced them into a larger space he would charge at her and she would run away. It got to the point where she just seemed to be scared of him and even if he approached in a non aggressive manner she would run away. However, very suddenly one night he was able to sort of corner her and began grooming her. I was really thrilled but it seems like at this point several weeks later this is as far as they have come. The male will groom the female and rarely she will groom him, though he seems to approach her for it pretty frequently, but she still often hops away from him. She seems to tolerate the grooming but doesn't reciprocate (I realize often this is a form of dominance and is natural). They will both sit in the same general area but she often still runs away if he approaches her, I kind of think maybe his aggressive behavior in the past sort of scarred her. At this point I am just wondering if this is as closely bonded as some rabbits get; basically to the point where they tolerate each other but aren't really friends. Has anybody else had their rabbits act like this and still become closer over time? Are some rabbit pairs just not meant to be? I want them both to have happy comfortable lives and I was under the impression that in general rabbits are happier in pairs or groups but at this point it seems like they aren't particularly enamored of each other. Does this even count as bonded?

Hello there! I am not sure if your 2 are actually living together or not so will assume they are. If this is the case and there is no fighting then t least they have accepted one another. When 2 rabbits are first introduced the general thing is the male chases the female and she runs away. This behaviour lasts for about 3 days at the end of which the female no long sees the male as a threat and they settle down with one another, start eating together and this is the start of their relationship. Some couples take much longer to bond deeply than others but eventually they do get closer.

I would say that their bond is getting there, as they have seemingly accepted each other and are possibly beginning to like each other (seems like the male almost definitely likes the female now) as they will groom each other on occasion and the male even asks to be groomed. It sounds like it is heading in the right direction and that their relationship is beginning to develop. It is just important to remember that while some bonds only take a few days to a week, others can take much longer, sometimes even taking as long as 6 months for the bond to be fully developed! Just be patient and persevere and I'm sure it will all be ok if they've already come this far

Your story sounds very similar to my trio bond. I'd just like to offer some assurance that bonds can get more loving & secure over time. Last year I bonded my boy -girl pair to another doe. There was never any fighting as such but one of my does (Mouse) was very wary of the other who would frequently chase & move her on a lot..we did have grooming by the dominant doe. Boo stopped chasing ages before Mouse became less wary but gradually you could see them getting closer & closer & then at 7 months it has been nothing but a non stop cuddle & grooming fest between all three bunnies. Yours will get there & their current relationship still sounds pretty good

Welcome to RU by the way

Hi. I would agree with previous posters that some bonds take time. Our female DeeDee and her first partner Ben were head over heels in love from day one. She groomed him for hours (to the point where she made his ears sore on occassion with all the licking) but after he died things were totally different with her new husbun Fred. They had a rocky start and once the fighting stopped it looked as though we weren't going to get beyond the 'resigned tolerance' stage. They would pass each other, sniff each other, give each other a cursory lick - but that was as good as it got. They rarely sat closely together. However, slowly over the last 3 months, their friendship has blossomed. Now they spend hours sitting together on the sofa, mutually grooming and just cuddling. If I give her food and she is not close to Fred she moves to sit by him and I have to move the food so that they can eat together and share a bowl. It has taken a full 6 months to get to this point, but I now feel the stress has been worth it. So hang in there, they will get there in the end.

Thank you everyone for the reassurance. I don't mind being patient and waiting for them to become more acquainted with each other, but it certainly helps to know that it will likely get better with time! I really appreciate you all sharing your similar stories wit me, I was just becoming a bit uncertain as so many people talk about how either their bunnies were in love at first sight or that a pair fought like cats and dogs from the beginning, and I hadn't run across much advice about what to do when they were just of sort of indifferent towards each other, I'm glad to know that this is not uncommon and these two are likely on their way to a more lasting bond.