moosea
Young Bun
Dear Rabbit,
It has been almost 6 months since our lives collided and now that we are more familliar with each other I feel it is time to ammend the house rules ;
Thank you for any attempt at co operating with the new rules, please feel free to amend them at any time without telling me.
Your slave
M
It has been almost 6 months since our lives collided and now that we are more familliar with each other I feel it is time to ammend the house rules ;
From now on all soft furnishings, including carpets, curtains and cushions, will be purchased second hand. This will ensure the material is soft and easily digested for your pleasure.
- Every second day I will empty your litter tray into difficult to clean corners, such as the threadbare one under the wardrobe in the spare room. This will eliminate the need for you to spend energy travelling to and discovering these places.
- Each evening, when I return from work, I will sprinkle the floors with a liberal covering of hay, to save you having to drag it out of the rack and spread it.
- My shoes are now considered 'fair game' at all times. They look much better with little chunks missing from them and are cooler for my feet. This also applies to the lower 6 inches of any trousers I may be stupid enough to wear.
- The telephone will only be answered while you are asleep so that you may be assured of my full attention at all waking times.
- I will set up a monthly direct debit for approximately half my wages, to be paid direct to our local pet shop. Emergency funding will be sent to amazon in case you need new toys, treats or bedding items.
- I will not leave the house for more than one hour at a time. I know you don't like me gone for long by the trail of devastation you leave for me.
- Electricity will be turned off to the property. This will allow you to indulge in your favourite hobby of chewing wires whilst remaining safe.
- You are entitled to 'banana rates' while living with me. This will worked out on the rate of two bites for you, one for me.
- You will repay me for the above sacrifices by occasionally pretending to recognise your name, and making some small effort to move in my direction within 30 minutes of hearing my first call.
- You will also be required to continue your habbit of climbing on my lap each evening for ' cuddle time' and also occasionally for 'sleepy time'
Thank you for any attempt at co operating with the new rules, please feel free to amend them at any time without telling me.
Your slave
M
