Feeling bad for daughter

Hi - just wanted to come on and air some anguish!! We recently rehomed 3 buns from a sanctuary for my daughter who is 8. She desperately wanted bunnies and so we made her spend at least 6 months investigating rabbit care. She wanted a bunny to pet and cuddle. After our investigations she became very knowledgable about rabbit and realised that they were prey animal etc. and so cuddles might be out of the question.

We went from possibly purchasing a rabbit from a store with a hutch to having my husband build a massive double story hutch with aviary attached and rehoming 3 lovely bunnies who are quite timid and certainly do not want to be picked up and cuddled!!! My daughter has been brilliant and goes out to them at least 3 times a day, sitting in their run, chatting to them etc. she feeds them, changes their litter etc. However I know she is a little disappointed that the she cannot stroke them much.

Today her friend arrived, announcing she has just got a rabbit from a pet shop who is living In her bedroom and who she is cuddling and sitting on the sofa with. My daughters face really broke my heart. We really wanted to do the right thing with our rabbits, but I can see how disappointed my daughter is. We spent so long telling her that rabbits were not like cats or dogs and now she is seeing her friend having exactly that sort of relationship with a rabbit.

I'm feeling quite bad


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Don't feel bad, you can honestly explain to your daughter how well she looks after her bunnies and that they are extremely happy with their lives. Bunnies are so much happier when they have a bunny friend and that is something you daughters friends rabbit does not have.
I just hope her friend doesn't get fed up of her bunny as that then suggests a very lonely little bunny which is something your daughters clearly aren't xx

Hopefully they'll become more friendly with time, rescue bunnies are often not used to being handled and so it takes a while for them to gain the trust of humans, but her sitting with them each day will definitely help She needs to take it really slow, like to start with just getting the rabbits used to coming up to her and not touching them, then just touching them when she's handfeeding them. If the rabbits are big food lovers that'll definitely help them learn that being stroked is a positive thing. I hope it works out for you all, it sounds like she's very responsible for her age and loves the rabbits, if she's good at investigating maybe tell her to have a look herself at methods of making rabbits easier to handle?

Loftyfiva said:

Don't feel bad, you can honestly explain to your daughter how well she looks after her bunnies and that they are extremely happy with their lives. Bunnies are so much happier when they have a bunny friend and that is something you daughters friends rabbit does not have.
I just hope her friend doesn't get fed up of her bunny as that then suggests a very lonely little bunny which is something your daughters clearly aren't xx

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This ^ . Plus most baby buns can be cuddled, it doesnt mean they like it and quite often they only tolerate it because they are too scared to fight it. Plus i bet friends bunny is kept in a very small cage (most pet shop buns get bought with a tiny hutch or cage), this means even if bun tries to get away, its easily cornered.

Plus in my experience most "cuddly" baby buns dont stay that way as they get older, especially if not neutered.

I would get your daughter to focus on how happy her bunnies are in their lovely big enclosure, with friends of their own species. Also how well she looks after them and how happy she must make them, they dont need to cuddle with her to show they do love her. Also point out that just because friend can pick up and cuddle bunny, it doesnt mean the bunny actually likes it and doesnt mean bunny will always allow it either.

ETA - Demi's got a good points about how to make your daughters buns happier to be stroked.

Also I think your daughter sounds very responsible and caring, her bunnies are lucky to have her.

if she did all that research about caring for rabbits, she might have spotted that, from their point of view, they don't exist for the purpose of being petted and cuddled by humans. they don't like the stress. and if they have other rabbits to hang out with, they want even less from humans. if she didn't read it, please point that out to her. she is doing a fabulous job, approaching her bunnies in exactly the right way. if they want cuddles, they show it. one of my four loves a cuddle. has she got some fenugreek crunchies? they're good for attracting bunny attention...

Your daughter sounds like a real little sweetheart to be putting in so much effort with the buns and their care

Hopefully your buns will come round and get used to you all. Like the OP said with food on hand and patience they get to know you and before long they will come running to see her.

xx

By the way I have 7 buns out of which only one will cuddle - whilst he feels like it and on his terms only

Oh thanks so much for all your advice and support xxx

I will point all of this out to her - she is a great girl, so know she will understand. our bunnies are very happy and I will look into the fenugreek crunchies. The girls have sensitive tums - are the crunchies ok for this? I guess we should introduce them slowly?

Thanks once again xxx


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Its best to introduce anything new very slowly :wave:

Maybe you could go through some of the stories and pictures of peoples on here with your daughter as there are lots of different types with different characters

Bunnies do get more friendly with time. My two are from a breeder and have always been happy to sit on me for cuddles. Although Levi prefers to sit next to me, and will choose to climb on me if he feels like it, however he is a definite licky bun and has been since being tiny. Daisy will happily go to sleep on me for hours but until recently she never ever licked me, I just accepted she wasn't like Levi in that respect, but after six months of love, cuddles and attention she has finally turned into a licky bun, not as often as Levi but she does lick me. I think this shows that all that attention hour daughter is giving her bunnies will pay off eventually. Maybe when it's warmer (and less wet on the ground) she could try lying down on the ground on her tummy and seeing if the bunnies will investigate her that way and maybe climb on her. Mine like to do that and it's funny having them sit on my back

In my experience all baby bunnies are cuddly, but as soon as hormones hit all that goes out the window, and if left unneutered they can even turn aggressive. How that little bunny behaves now is absolutely no indication on how it'll behave when its grown.

Your daughter has given a lovely home to 3 needy bunnies which is such a lovely thing to do. As they settle their confidence will grow and they will start to be more affectionate. I have bunnies who were full on aggressive when I got them, yet they will happily sit for a snuggle now.

Your daughters bunnies have a super home and a super bunny slave.

Just because her friend's bunny tolerates being cuddled doesn't mean it enjoys it. Plus, if it is from a pet shop it will likely still be a baby. They're quite easy to handle as babies but as soon as they get older they will scratch and twist to get free if they're being held and don't like it - I've never met a rabbit that doesn't do this and mine have all been friendly!

Also, single bunnies will gravitate more towards humans because they don't have bunny company and they're lonely. I notice my single bun (who will be paired up once she's spayed) does her best to be near to me and will flop out next to my feet or on the sofa if that's where I am, or under my chair if I'm at the table, but I fully expect that she will abandon me in favour of her bunny friend when she's got a boyfriend. It will be sad for me because it's nice being loved :lol: but ultimately is for the best.

Your approach to pet care sounds fantastic and your daughter sounds lovely.

your daughters buns have a much better life...and will come arround when they make the link between her and tipbits.

anyhow I have a trio and it means so much more to me when one of them chooses to approach me rather then a lonely solo who has no choice. if mine come over they really want to- not just comming over because desperate for any company!

my gang really like fenugreek crunchies but also dandylion leaves, bramble leaves, bamboo and they are useful snacks for showing a little friendship

Agree with everything thats been said. I just want to say your daughter sounds so sweet and caring, well done to you for raising such a caring and responsible little girl!

Bunnies by nature do not like to be picked up as in the wild that is what would happen just befote they are killed and eaten so its likely that her friends bunny is actually terrified when being picked up, your daughter is doing it right and hopefully after some timw they will become more loving towards her.

Don't give up to soon, with commitment like that, your daughter may find her bunnies gradually build up trust and interest and will become much more keen to interact and be touched.

When you say she feeds them, do you mean puts the food in the hutch for them? I'd suggest she tried hand feeding the pellets or at least a few pf the pellets each time. Rabbit's usually find just normal dry food very tasty so it's a good way to bond without getting them fat with lots of treats :lol:

If they won't take food from her hand then poping a pellet down in front of them to start with is fine, build things up slowly.

I'd also suggest sitting in their run or next to the hutch ignoring them - they are very inquisitive. It might be a little chilly now, but as the weather warms up, sitting with them to do her school reading would be good bonding. That way they get used to her and her voice and she's spending time with them without giving them too much focus to be worrying to them.

There are some easy to make toys here, she might like to try, even if they won't be cuddled, enjoying something she's made might cheer her up: http://www.therabbithouse.com/blog/2011/02/10/cardboard-tube-toys-part-3/

Please tell her not to be downhearted. My two boys took nearly a year to get confident enough to come near me. Now they jump all over me, Groom me and love noserubs. I still don't pick them up and cuddle them. They are amasing so funny and cute.

Agree with Tamsin - my first bunny was a rescue and a bit aloof but I ended up sitting out with him reading magazines and he soon got inquisitive! Also bunnies LOVE food when they have the right diet so when feeding treats I do so whilst making a kissing kinda noise. Now every time I make that noise they come running over thinking I have yummy treats and I am a good thing and not something to be scared of and won't result in them ring swooped up!

Some buns are more timid and just won't go there but you can be assured your daughters 3 buns will be happier now and I the long run! Xx


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It is hard to not have a loving relationship with your pet from the beginning, but once her rabbits have warmed up to her she will probably feel very proud of what she has accomplished. I work with rabbits at my local shelter who come from a wide array of homes and it is such a rewarding experience the first time they climb into my lap, take food from my hand, or even not hiding the entire time they're out.

One of my rabbits was terrified when I first adopted her, she came from a very bad home and she did not want me touching her at all. After a lot of patience and letting her come to me, she loves to be cuddled:


You're daughter sounds like a very good animal person and it's really obvious from what you've said that she loves her rabbits very much. If she continues doing what she's doing they will become much more friendly