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Fed up about Alf and Roo

JemimaH

Warren Veteran
Long story short Alf and Roo fell out in October and haven't been rebonded since (I tried, they fought badly). They're both now living next to each other separated through what is like a puppy pen panel but with thicker bars. They can still see/smell/touch each other, but will fight when put together even though the bond is always done in neutral places etc, I did it to the book. I've now just got to the stage where I am feeling so guilty, because I am in effect doing everything wrong.

Their housing is too small. Their aviary is 10ftx5ft and they are in half each, which was only meant to be temporary but it's not really working out.
They are outdoors and 'alone'. No bunny snuggles over winter for them. They used to snuggle so much :(
They don't get much human interaction. I try and stroke them etc but they just run away.

I just feel like it's no fun anymore :( I'm only young (14 nearly 15) and I don't know what to do. I love them to bits, they are never ignored or anything and always have fresh food/water/hay/strokes if they will rarely accept them. I brought Rosy into the house and she loved it, binkying and just generally being really happy.

I have another bunny, Dee, who is indoors and single but she thrives and loves snuggles. Part of me thinks I should just rehome Rosy and let her go to another bun and snuggle up again. She always was a bully to Alfie, constantly pulling his fur etc. There were more strops then arguments but Alfie gave so much to her and loved her to bits. I feel like I couldn't rehome Alfie as he has a blocked tearduct which has cost us over £1000 in around six months, and I love him too much. I couldn't rebond Alfie to Dee though as Dee is 7 in a week, Alf is 3 this year, so when Dee dies if Alf pines we should get him another bunny but we can't financially commit to that, not now.

I'm trying (more like forcing myself) to be realistic but any thought of rehoming Rosy makes me cry :oops: so it's not easy. I just don't know what to do, I must do the right thing by them no matter how hard it is for me but I don't know what that is :( They're my babies and I love them :(

Help :(
 
Long story short Alf and Roo fell out in October and haven't been rebonded since (I tried, they fought badly). They're both now living next to each other separated through what is like a puppy pen panel but with thicker bars. They can still see/smell/touch each other, but will fight when put together even though the bond is always done in neutral places etc, I did it to the book. I've now just got to the stage where I am feeling so guilty, because I am in effect doing everything wrong.

Their housing is too small. Their aviary is 10ftx5ft and they are in half each, which was only meant to be temporary but it's not really working out.
They are outdoors and 'alone'. No bunny snuggles over winter for them. They used to snuggle so much :(
They don't get much human interaction. I try and stroke them etc but they just run away.

I just feel like it's no fun anymore :( I'm only young (14 nearly 15) and I don't know what to do. I love them to bits, they are never ignored or anything and always have fresh food/water/hay/strokes if they will rarely accept them. I brought Rosy into the house and she loved it, binkying and just generally being really happy.

I have another bunny, Dee, who is indoors and single but she thrives and loves snuggles. Part of me thinks I should just rehome Rosy and let her go to another bun and snuggle up again. She always was a bully to Alfie, constantly pulling his fur etc. There were more strops then arguments but Alfie gave so much to her and loved her to bits. I feel like I couldn't rehome Alfie as he has a blocked tearduct which has cost us over £1000 in around six months, and I love him too much. I couldn't rebond Alfie to Dee though as Dee is 7 in a week, Alf is 3 this year, so when Dee dies if Alf pines we should get him another bunny but we can't financially commit to that, not now.

I'm trying (more like forcing myself) to be realistic but any thought of rehoming Rosy makes me cry :oops: so it's not easy. I just don't know what to do, I must do the right thing by them no matter how hard it is for me but I don't know what that is :( They're my babies and I love them :(

Help :(
I'm 14 .. 15 this year I have a bun called rhubarb who lives alone in my bedroom in a 8ft by 4ft space (half my room) he is happy alone as he gets lots of human contact and next door to him is my guinea pig blossom (there not in the same cage as I don't agree with it but they can sniff and see each other) I would never get rhu a friend as he hates other rabbits and animals but I think being indoors with my 3 dogs (who are all the same size as him and very very laid back (they tend to groom each other! :love: ) has helped a lot! Maybe u could bring your rabbits inside?
 
Just a thought, but do you think bonding them as a trio could work?

Are there any rescues in your area that could do this for you? I find that if rabbits are away from their home completely, that they are more likely to bond. Failing that, then you may have to rehome one and try bonding Alfie and Dee.
 
Just a thought, but do you think bonding them as a trio could work?

Are there any rescues in your area that could do this for you? I find that if rabbits are away from their home completely, that they are more likely to bond. Failing that, then you may have to rehome one and try bonding Alfie and Dee.

I was going suggest trying to get help from an experienced bonder who is local to you.
I imagined Alfie & Rosie going somewhere else to be bonded.
The bonder could look at your outdoor setup & give you homework to do while the bond was taking place.
Make a separate thread asking for bonding help.
 
Just a thought, but do you think bonding them as a trio could work?

Are there any rescues in your area that could do this for you? I find that if rabbits are away from their home completely, that they are more likely to bond. Failing that, then you may have to rehome one and try bonding Alfie and Dee.

Hi :) I've considered this many times but I'm don't think it'd work. I know that you have to take the reactions when through the mesh with a pinch of salt, but when Rosy has been in the enclosure and Dee's been on the lawn in the run, even though they're not near each other Dee's scent drives Rosy crazy - literally crazy! Before when Alfie was living with Roo, if Roo smelt Dee she'd start chasing and nipping Alfie until I intervened. I've stroked Dee and gone to feed Rosy before and the scent has caused Rosy to lunge and very nearly bite me - it seems like she just can't stand the smell of Dee. They're both spayed but I have never met a rabbit like Rosy before, she is such a bossy and moody :censored: and I think I'd be too worried about Roo harming Dee. Plus Dee hasn't been with a bunny since 2009 so I'm not sure she'd take too kindly to it.

I'd also considered bonding Alf and Dee, but my dilemma is Dee is 7 this week and Alfie is just 2. When Dee dies, which will be within the next couple of years I bet, Alfie may pine and we can't financially commit to another rabbit as two cats and three rabbits have us at bursting point anyway, but my Mum is losing her job at the end of next month with little warning, so we're going to really struggle as it is.

I just don't know what to decide, or how to even make that decision! :(

ETA nearest rescue is Woodgreen Godmanchester and that's over an hour away - plus I don't think they do bonding :?
 
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I'm 14 .. 15 this year I have a bun called rhubarb who lives alone in my bedroom in a 8ft by 4ft space (half my room) he is happy alone as he gets lots of human contact and next door to him is my guinea pig blossom (there not in the same cage as I don't agree with it but they can sniff and see each other) I would never get rhu a friend as he hates other rabbits and animals but I think being indoors with my 3 dogs (who are all the same size as him and very very laid back (they tend to groom each other! :love: ) has helped a lot! Maybe u could bring your rabbits inside?

Hi, I've already got one of mine inside and for some reason her scent drives my other doe absolutely bonkers, plus we have two cats and I'd be too worried (my indoor bun isn't fazed as she's been around them since they were kittens).
 
Is there someone from the RU community who is nearby & could help with bonding?
 
Coming back to this again - in bed and nearly crying. I can't give them what they need and I feel like I have failed them. I wasn't to know they'd fall out but they've been single for 5 months now. I don't enjoy having them. That sounds awful, but I don't. They're a chore and I love them, I love them to bits, but they just aren't fun anymore.

God, I don't want to rehome rosy. I always thought I'd have them forever. I don't want to say goodbye, because that's letting her down. She is the best bunny, she's so cheeky and funny and gorgeous and I love her more than I can ever describe, but I can't give her what she needs. Nor Alfie. I can't rehome them both though. It'd have to be rosy.

I hate this :cry::cry::cry:
 
Personally, before considering this, I would have a real look into asking if somebody can bond them for you.

Animals are not here for our fun. :? Looking after them is hard work, and I know that you feel you can't give your rabbits what they need, but I think you need to look at other options.

Would Dee and Alfie not bond?

I still think that trying to bond them all into a trio, or even just sending Alfie and Dee/Rosie away to be bonded is what you need. You can't go on what their reactions will be like when they see/smell another bun on their territory. Of course the smell of another bun will drive Rosie crazy, the females are generally dominant, and she will take out her frustration on Alfie...hence the referred aggression.

Either way, you have 3 single buns that need partners, so if you seriously think you cannot give them all the time and care you need, as well as a partners, then rehoming them might be the best option. Unfortunately, that is easier said than done.
 
Personally, before considering this, I would have a real look into asking if somebody can bond them for you.

Animals are not here for our fun. :? Looking after them is hard work, and I know that you feel you can't give your rabbits what they need, but I think you need to look at other options.

Would Dee and Alfie not bond?

I still think that trying to bond them all into a trio, or even just sending Alfie and Dee/Rosie away to be bonded is what you need. You can't go on what their reactions will be like when they see/smell another bun on their territory. Of course the smell of another bun will drive Rosie crazy, the females are generally dominant, and she will take out her frustration on Alfie...hence the referred aggression.

Either way, you have 3 single buns that need partners, so if you seriously think you cannot give them all the time and care you need, as well as a partners, then rehoming them might be the best option. Unfortunately, that is easier said than done.

I wouldn't know where to start, asking to rebond them. I don't even know if it the right thing to do. I know they're not here for our fun, but it's gone from 'yay, let's go and feed/clean etc the bunnies' to 'urgh, bunny time'...may just be because the weather is downright awful, but I always thought I'd enjoy having them.

My issue with bonding Dee and Alfie is that Dee is 7, Alf is 3 in August. If I bond them and then Dee dies a year later, Alfie may well become very lonely and pine for another bunny - we cannot financially commit to another bunny, so he'd have to stay as a single bunny. I don't feel like I can rehome Alfie though.

Dee won't be getting a partner, she's an indoor single bunny anyway, it's just what to do with Alfie and Roo. It's like being stuck between a rock and a hard place. Their bond wasn't the greatest anyway, Rosy was a real bully to Alfie and I have noticed he is happier being away from Rosy (that sounds mad but it's true!) so again, I don't know whether rebonding them would be fair. I think if I rehomed Rosy I'd try bonding Alf and Dee and just accept that once Dee is dead, Alfie will have to live indoors as a single bunny.

It's not an issue of them getting the care they need - they are always cared for and are never neglected or anything. I just know that Rosy cannot live the rest of her life as she is now.

My concern with sending them away to be bonded would be that they will appear to be bonded until we get then home, put them in their enclosure and they start to fight. That's what happened the last few times we've tried - it's been going fine until we put them outside as opposed to indoors in the dog crate (the whole area is completely neutral and everything) then Rosy starts attacking Alfie badly.

*sigh* it's all so complicated!
 
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I wouldn't know where to start, asking to rebond them. I don't even know if it the right thing to do. I know they're not here for our fun, but it's gone from 'yay, let's go and feed/clean etc the bunnies' to 'urgh, bunny time'...may just be because the weather is downright awful, but I always thought I'd enjoy having them.

My issue with bonding Dee and Alfie is that Dee is 7, Alf is 3 in August. If I bond them and then Dee dies a year later, Alfie may well become very lonely and pine for another bunny - we cannot financially commit to another bunny, so he'd have to stay as a single bunny. I don't feel like I can rehome Alfie though.

Dee won't be getting a partner, she's an indoor single bunny anyway, it's just what to do with Alfie and Roo. It's like being stuck between a rock and a hard place. Their bond wasn't the greatest anyway, Rosy was a real bully to Alfie and I have noticed he is happier being away from Rosy (that sounds mad but it's true!) so again, I don't know whether rebonding them would be fair. I think if I rehomed Rosy I'd try bonding Alf and Dee and just accept that once Dee is dead, Alfie will have to live indoors as a single bunny.

It's not an issue of them getting the care they need - they are always cared for and are never neglected or anything. I just know that Rosy cannot live the rest of her life as she is now.

My concern with sending them away to be bonded would be that they will appear to be bonded until we get then home, put them in their enclosure and they start to fight. That's what happened the last few times we've tried - it's been going fine until we put them outside as opposed to indoors in the dog crate (the whole area is completely neutral and everything) then Rosy starts attacking Alfie badly.

*sigh* it's all so complicated!

Even indoor bunnies need a friend, tbh. My trio are all indoors, and they certainly need each other, even Fiver, who is obsessed with me. I think rehoming should be your absolute last resort. I would certainly say it is worth sending them off to be bonded. Could you not keep Alfie and Rosy indoors too?

If you bond Alfie and Dee..and Dee dies..then why wouldn't you be able to get another bun? You'd have had 2 buns anyway, so why would it matter if you got another bun for Alfie? I understand that it can be a never ending cycle of bunnies, and if you aren't wanting more bunnies in the future then that's fair enough, but your rabbits really do need company.

If you decide to rehome, be prepared to wait a long time for a home to come along.
 
Even indoor bunnies need a friend, tbh. My trio are all indoors, and they certainly need each other, even Fiver, who is obsessed with me. I think rehoming should be your absolute last resort. I would certainly say it is worth sending them off to be bonded. Could you not keep Alfie and Rosy indoors too?

If you bond Alfie and Dee..and Dee dies..then why wouldn't you be able to get another bun? You'd have had 2 buns anyway, so why would it matter if you got another bun for Alfie? I understand that it can be a never ending cycle of bunnies, and if you aren't wanting more bunnies in the future then that's fair enough, but your rabbits really do need company.

If you decide to rehome, be prepared to wait a long time for a home to come along.

We've all had a long chat, my parents and I, and have exhausted every possibility but we've decided that it's for the best if we re-home Rosy sadly. We just don't think it's fair to put Alfie back with Rosy, and Rosy suits being indoors better anyway we feel and we can't have her indoors. She'd make a brilliant housebun :love: So I think we'll bond Alfie and Dee (or find a rescue/someone else to do it, I couldn't cope with the stress :oops:) and cross the bridge about getting a new bun for Alfie in the future when we come to it. The only reason I said we might not be able to get another bunny is Mum is losing her job, we're stretched to the limit anyway with 2 cats and three buns and I don't know if that situation will ever pick up, so it might be we can't afford another bunny as we have to use all the money possible. It turns out she's getting a new job though so hopefully we'd be able to :)

Now to find a new home...She's due for her re-vac next month so will ask the rabbit vet if she knows anyone as ideally I'd like her to go to someone fairly local, but failing that I'd probably advertise her on here. I have to be honest, now I've reached the decision, I feel a lot more relieved as it was really bugging me about Rosy and was making me quite unhappy. Thank you for replying! :)
 
Don't worry too much. I think you're doing the right thing by rehoming one of them. Lots of people on here will frown at your decision but there is no reason why Rosy won't be happy in a new home, or why the new home won't treat her right.

I felt the same way about selling my horse who was effectively a big pet. It broke my heart but once he was sold it was a huge weight off my shoulders. Good luck :)
 
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