But really, really need the break. I'm totally exhausted. Working full time and being so obsessive in looking after/spending time with the buns has taken it's toll, and if I don't have a break from it I really think I would have some kind of breakdown in one way I can't wait, I love holidays and sunshine so much, I'm just terrified of leaving Olly he has become much closer to me since Honey died, he comes running to me for snuggles on the floor, and just loves spending time with me my mum and dad will be staying at our house to look after them all, and they do all know and like my mum (they think my dad's a bit scary :lol, I am so worried about Olly thinking I've abandoned him I can't bear the thought of him being sad again I hope he doesn't stop eating or get sick I'm not as worried about all the others, it's just Olly.