Grief

It does my head in that every grief is different, feels different, plays out differently.

I just wondered who else could relate to that? Different feelings of grief for different animals you have. And then the associated feelings that go with it (like when you don't cry or feel anything, feeling guilt for that animal- like they were less worthy or something)

I do know it's ok, and just to accept it, and all that, but it still does my head in.

I cant really offer a response that will make even the slightest bit of sense. I thought I knew how to handle the Grieving Process. But I have found out the hard way that I do not and frankly right now I doubt I ever will

Sorry that you are struggling too, in your own way. I wish I could be of some help but I know I cant xx

Yep I know what you mean, I have lost 4 beloved buns in the past 18 months, which has been devastating, all have affected me differently, none have been easy. I'd only had Womble a few months and he had just found true love with Pansy, they were so close, they were both young, healthy and happy, loosing him was awful, the others were devastating but I know they had had happy lives and been loved by me and other bunnies, but Womble had only just found that and it's seems so unfair

I lost poppy, one of my original buns very recently, and I feel more heartache at seeing Gus alone and grieving

I have only lost the one bun so far - but have had a few hamsters go - a couple had to be pts but most of them went in their sleep at a good old age. I always grieved more over the ones I had to have pts - maybe it's because their lives were cut short, guilt over not being able to make them better - I don't know.

I am still very upset about little Luna - I think it will take some time to get over the emotions of last week and the final moments of her going keep playing in a loop in my head. The logical part of me is getting quite annoyed with these emotions - keep telling myself that it was for the best and we did all we could - but I still feel it was so unfair that she had such a short life and that makes me angry as well...with God, the universe, fate, myself.

I suppose every animal is different and the way the way we grieve will different - depending on our bond with the animal and the circumstances of their passing. I still quietly grieve over my dog which I lost over 20 years ago and miss her desperatly. But other dogs we had - not so much.

This grief business just sucks - big time!

I lost pickles last thursday after she was with us for six weeks and im still crying every day

I have no idea how ill cope when I lose bruce alfie or harley

(((((Hugs)))))

Something I struggle with after the last year.

I can't bear it. I've "only" lost 1 bun so far *touches wood* and I handled it very badly. She was my soul bun and I fell apart

I absolutely dread losing any of the others

For me the worse is when I can't/don't cry, the guilt that goes along with it is awful. It makes you feel like you didn't love them enough, although I'm not sure that is really the case, I think sometimes its more the circumstances surrounding the loss. Shock can sometimes leave me a bit stunned and unable to respond emotionally.

Fellie said:

I have only lost the one bun so far - but have had a few hamsters go - a couple had to be pts but most of them went in their sleep at a good old age. I always grieved more over the ones I had to have pts - maybe it's because their lives were cut short, guilt over not being able to make them better - I don't know.

I am still very upset about little Luna - I think it will take some time to get over the emotions of last week and the final moments of her going keep playing in a loop in my head. The logical part of me is getting quite annoyed with these emotions - keep telling myself that it was for the best and we did all we could - but I still feel it was so unfair that she had such a short life and that makes me angry as well...with God, the universe, fate, myself.
I suppose every animal is different and the way the way we grieve will different - depending on our bond with the animal and the circumstances of their passing. I still quietly grieve over my dog which I lost over 20 years ago and miss her desperatly. But other dogs we had - not so much.

This grief business just sucks - big time!

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This is exactly how I was feeling with Mango. If it's any help, I'm past that now - the constant replaying his last day or so - it lasted about a week for me. I'm finding I can focus more on the 'good' memories now.

When I lost Humphrey after just 2 weeks I cried and cried and cried for a whole day. But I've not since. When I do think of him I feel like I failed him and it does give me a knot in my tummy but I don't feel like crying again.

It's different for everything and everyone. A bun isn't more or less special because of the amount of crying you do.

I've just lost the one bunny, but have lost other animals & a few people, and the one which has devastated me was my little bunny, Dexter. I've dedicated a post to him in the rainbow bridge section, but to try & summarise, he was born May 2011, I got him August 2011 and I had to have him put to sleep in December 2011 after suffering almost his entire life with me with E. Cuniculi. I cried constantly for a day and almost all the next week. I then stopped crying & talking about him with anyone as nobody understood & were all "are you not over it yet?" But I still think of him everyday and the years are never far away if I think/talk about him too long. I miss him terribly, and I try not to remember the day he died as it was the worst day of my life. Everybody grieves differently & I am now far more understanding of other people's losses even years later as I now know how it feels to lose something you loved heart & soul.
I have Slipper now and I love her, but I don't feel the same way about her as I love Dex. I'll be very upset when she goes & I'll miss her, but I don't think it will be on the same scale as Dex. I feel guilty but also relieved as I couldn't take that kind of pain again

I hope that last bit made sense & you understand what I meant. I mean no disrespect to Slipper as I am very fond of her, but Dexy was uniquely special & so occupies a very special place in my heart.

I'm so sorry that you're feeling this way. I don't think you should be hard on yourself and I don't think you should expect to grieve in a certain way. It's different for everyone for every bunny/ animal that they lose.

My Denzil died last year, he was nearly 7 and I'd had him since he was 9wks old. He had cancer and I made the decision for him to have 2 operations - 1 when it was first diagnosed and 1 when it came back a few months later. It was the 2nd op that was too much for him and he died at home a week later. To this day, I regret the 2nd op and would give anything to turn back the clock but I learnt from it and when his mate, Daisy was diagnosed with cancer this year, at nearly 8 years old I was comfortable with my decision to opt for end of life care at home and to have her put to sleep,when the time was right.

That time was nearly 3 weeks ago and although it was heartbreaking it was the right decision. It still upsets me but I'm at peace with it and I look back on her last few weeks and see how happy she was. But, with Denzil I look back and think I should've done things differently and opted for end of life care rather than another op.

Grief is a personal thing between you and the person/animal that you lose. What will be will be so please don't be too hard on yourself xxxxxxxxx

*squishes you all*