parsnipbun
Wise Old Thumper
PARSLEY: Apparently after my first interviews with Albus and Cornelius there was great public demand for a series of 'Parsley Interviews . . ' and as the number of buns around here gives me a lot of scope . . . Today I bowed to public pressure and took my notebook in paw over to where Princess Peaches was catching up on her beauty sleep in her castle . . .
all did not go well at first . . . .
PARSLEY: Ahhhheemmmmmmm . . . . errrr . . . excuse me but as roving reporter I have been asked to hop over and interview you for RU . .
PRINCESS PEACHES: Did you see my agent?
PARSLEY: mmmm . . is that Papa . .
PRINCESS PEACHES: No
PARSLEY: mmmm . . well is it Mama then . . .
PRINCESS PEACHES (guardedly): it might be . . . . did you mention a fee?
PARSLEY: I'll share my meds and banana baby porridge with you tonight . . .
PRINCESS PEACHES: Its a deal - but forget the meds. So what do you want to know - I have my beauty sleep to think of ?
PARSLEY: Well lets start at the beginning . . Is the rumour true that you came from a Pet Shop and not a rescue?
PRINCESS PEACHES: I dont really like to talk about my origins but just this once I will confirm the rumours - I had been there for a while in a nasty glass box in a too strong light (I still prefer to wear sunglasses on a sunny day) and none of the families had come up to my expectations until Mama and Papa heard of me and came to find me. Of course they were nervous about taking on a superstar but once the silly shop assistant dropped me on the floor they felt that I should stand no more indignities . .
PARSLEY: And while we are on rumours . . . some buns have tried to tell me that your hair is made of false extensions . . can you comment on that?
PRINCESS PEACHES: [with a very nasty look in here eyes]: show me who they are and my lawyer will deal with them . . . these ringlets are for real
PARSLEY: [backing off slightly] errr - yes of course . . perhaps you could share with us some of the favourite moments of your career since coming here?
PRINCESS PEACHES: [calming down a bit]. . of course . . well as you know I am superbly photogenic and have starred in many of the Open Day Posters (including both this years), I also feature on your own Twitter Page and blog (@parsleybun) and have recently had another photo-shoot session with yourself, Mama and Papa at the professional photographers Dumbleton's in Cambridge. My highpoint was the fashion shoot for 'Candy Pink' when I graciously co-starred with a human model for some real fashion pages. We travelled to London for that as it was shot 'on location'.
PARSLEY: [putting his intrepid reporters paw in it again . . .] . . Many people have asked me to ask you how it feels with such a star as myself . . I do have over 100 twitter followers now you know . . .
PRINCESS PEACHES: Obviously there is some element of tension there . . but it enables me to dodge the paparazi at times . . leaving them to you to deal with
PARSLEY: any other comments on our relationship whilst we are on the subject?
PRINCESS PEACHES: Well people obviously draw attention to the dissimilarity in looks, character, intelligence, origins etc etc . . but I like to think that one can choose one's boyfriend buns regardless of the fact they come from 'the wrong side of the tracks' . . . every princess occasionally dreams of something a little 'rougher' than your average Prince
PARSLEY: Have you any other final comments for the people of RU?
PRINCESS PEACHES: I would just like to take this opportunity to thank my agent (Mama) and of course Papa, and all the other buns for supporting me (apart from that Pansy . . . ) . . . and Charlie for lying adoringly at my feet whenever he can , and Aliduncan for my lovely castle, and . . . .
[Parsley wanders off with notepad for a snooze. . . . ]
NEWS FLASH:
Shortly after the completion o f this interview the Princess Peaches Management inc. released the following Press Release:
'Following the recent regrettable incident nicknamed in the press 'The Princess, The Pee and The Puffee' Princess Peaches Management inc. wish to refute any rumours that their client is suffering from lapses of etiquette due to being in the 'lady way'(and has a vets certificate to prove it): the particular modelling assignment during which the incident happened was prolonged and no contractual toiletting breaks had been arranged. This will not occur again as facilities will be agreed in advance. We would also like to clarify that the 'pouffee' involved was a Bean Bag prop, and we regret that rumours of homophobia on the part of Princess Peaches which have proved so upsetting for the photographer, were unfortunately caused by Parsley's poor understanding of the fine distinction in spelling between poufes and poofs.
Evidence of PP's close relationship with the photographer may be seen on twitter @parsleybun
all did not go well at first . . . .
PARSLEY: Ahhhheemmmmmmm . . . . errrr . . . excuse me but as roving reporter I have been asked to hop over and interview you for RU . .
PRINCESS PEACHES: Did you see my agent?
PARSLEY: mmmm . . is that Papa . .
PRINCESS PEACHES: No
PARSLEY: mmmm . . well is it Mama then . . .
PRINCESS PEACHES (guardedly): it might be . . . . did you mention a fee?
PARSLEY: I'll share my meds and banana baby porridge with you tonight . . .
PRINCESS PEACHES: Its a deal - but forget the meds. So what do you want to know - I have my beauty sleep to think of ?
PARSLEY: Well lets start at the beginning . . Is the rumour true that you came from a Pet Shop and not a rescue?
PRINCESS PEACHES: I dont really like to talk about my origins but just this once I will confirm the rumours - I had been there for a while in a nasty glass box in a too strong light (I still prefer to wear sunglasses on a sunny day) and none of the families had come up to my expectations until Mama and Papa heard of me and came to find me. Of course they were nervous about taking on a superstar but once the silly shop assistant dropped me on the floor they felt that I should stand no more indignities . .
PARSLEY: And while we are on rumours . . . some buns have tried to tell me that your hair is made of false extensions . . can you comment on that?
PRINCESS PEACHES: [with a very nasty look in here eyes]: show me who they are and my lawyer will deal with them . . . these ringlets are for real
PARSLEY: [backing off slightly] errr - yes of course . . perhaps you could share with us some of the favourite moments of your career since coming here?
PRINCESS PEACHES: [calming down a bit]. . of course . . well as you know I am superbly photogenic and have starred in many of the Open Day Posters (including both this years), I also feature on your own Twitter Page and blog (@parsleybun) and have recently had another photo-shoot session with yourself, Mama and Papa at the professional photographers Dumbleton's in Cambridge. My highpoint was the fashion shoot for 'Candy Pink' when I graciously co-starred with a human model for some real fashion pages. We travelled to London for that as it was shot 'on location'.
PARSLEY: [putting his intrepid reporters paw in it again . . .] . . Many people have asked me to ask you how it feels with such a star as myself . . I do have over 100 twitter followers now you know . . .
PRINCESS PEACHES: Obviously there is some element of tension there . . but it enables me to dodge the paparazi at times . . leaving them to you to deal with
PARSLEY: any other comments on our relationship whilst we are on the subject?
PRINCESS PEACHES: Well people obviously draw attention to the dissimilarity in looks, character, intelligence, origins etc etc . . but I like to think that one can choose one's boyfriend buns regardless of the fact they come from 'the wrong side of the tracks' . . . every princess occasionally dreams of something a little 'rougher' than your average Prince
PARSLEY: Have you any other final comments for the people of RU?
PRINCESS PEACHES: I would just like to take this opportunity to thank my agent (Mama) and of course Papa, and all the other buns for supporting me (apart from that Pansy . . . ) . . . and Charlie for lying adoringly at my feet whenever he can , and Aliduncan for my lovely castle, and . . . .
[Parsley wanders off with notepad for a snooze. . . . ]
NEWS FLASH:
Shortly after the completion o f this interview the Princess Peaches Management inc. released the following Press Release:
'Following the recent regrettable incident nicknamed in the press 'The Princess, The Pee and The Puffee' Princess Peaches Management inc. wish to refute any rumours that their client is suffering from lapses of etiquette due to being in the 'lady way'(and has a vets certificate to prove it): the particular modelling assignment during which the incident happened was prolonged and no contractual toiletting breaks had been arranged. This will not occur again as facilities will be agreed in advance. We would also like to clarify that the 'pouffee' involved was a Bean Bag prop, and we regret that rumours of homophobia on the part of Princess Peaches which have proved so upsetting for the photographer, were unfortunately caused by Parsley's poor understanding of the fine distinction in spelling between poufes and poofs.
Evidence of PP's close relationship with the photographer may be seen on twitter @parsleybun
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