• Forum/Server Upgrade If you are reading this you have made it to the upgraded forum. Posts made on the old forum after 26th October 2023 have not been transfered. Everything else should be here. If you find any issues please let us know.

Help! How to approach family member to give help without offending?

Anmagdan

Young Bun
Bear with me on this one, I have many thoughts zooming around and I need to organise them to make this question make sense.

Background: The loss of Moofy has really impacted on me, I would love to have two bonded indoor bunnies. However, I am unemployed and living with my parents after a mental breakdown earlier this year (I'm 20 years old). I can't ask my parents to pay the vet bills for two animals that are under my care, so I shall wait until I am well enough to cope with a job, after all, if something went wrong and I couldn't afford it, I'd feel so awful.

Btw. I know how much care you have to put into looking after an animal. I found caring for Moofy really helpful, even if it was heartbreaking to watch him sink further and further in the last week of his life.

My cousin (mid 30s?) has 3 children, 1 dog (one recently got put down) and 2 rabbits, and although she is a house wife as you can imagine 3 kids are quite a handful, and I would really like to help her out with looking after the animals. I *think* she still gets someone else to walk the remaining dog, Billy, every day so I don't know how these two rabbits are looked after. She lives 2 roads away from me.

She's not a bad person, I just don't think she knows enough, and I'm not an expert in the slightest I just think I may be a little bit more aware of bunny needs. I can not help but think about the bunnies, and hope that they are warm and safe.

As I mentioned before I'm unemployed, so I spend most of my time doing art as I'm not really well enough to go back into work. I have access to lots of herbs, willow, hawthorn and some apple trees even.

Should I approach her, how can I approach her, to offer my help in making sure these animals have a good life for the rest of their remaining years?
 
Hello :wave:

I think it's a nice thing you want to do ~ my guess is she has her hands full and might really appreciate a pair of helping hands.

My advice would be to approach it as if *she* is doing *you* a favour. Perhaps say to her that you'd really appreciate a little bit of responsibility whilst you are still recovering, and how would she feel if you came to look after the bunnies every few days, and perhaps take the dog for a walk sometimes. You could offer to take charge of cleaning their hutch/cage ~ surely she'd like some help with such a boring task..! ;) Offer to do a bit of grooming as well, a bit of bunny brushing is good for the soul, we all know that.

Don't let her feel that you think she doesn't know enough, as she could take offense to that. The trick would be to make her feel that she's doing it for you and your wellbeing. :)
 
I agree. I would ask if you can do it for you, to make you feel better. Say you really miss your rabbit and would like to look after hers. :)
 
I certainly agree I need to approach it like it will be doing me a favour, (which it is) and explain that I do not want money.

I mentioned it to my mum and she looked a bit sceptical at me as if I was doing something wrong by wanting to do this.
 
Hmm...what did you say to your mum? Maybe she thinks you'll get bored after a couple of weeks? Or maybe she's worried she'll have to get her daughter out of prison after a double bunnynapping! :lol:
 
I don't know why you think they don't have a happy life, but unless you gave real concerns about their care I really don't see why you would say/do anything.

I'm in my mid 30s. I have a hectic life, but if someone implied I wasn't looking after them well enough I'd be devastated. As I type I'm sat cross-legged in my bunshed with my buns.

It's also not clear from your post what you want to achieve. If you want to go visit them and offer to hrlp with cleaning out etc, then I'm sure you could find a way to ask that, but If you want to take them away from her then I don't know why you'd do that
 
Hello :wave:

I think it's a nice thing you want to do ~ my guess is she has her hands full and might really appreciate a pair of helping hands.

My advice would be to approach it as if *she* is doing *you* a favour. Perhaps say to her that you'd really appreciate a little bit of responsibility whilst you are still recovering, and how would she feel if you came to look after the bunnies every few days, and perhaps take the dog for a walk sometimes. You could offer to take charge of cleaning their hutch/cage ~ surely she'd like some help with such a boring task..! ;) Offer to do a bit of grooming as well, a bit of bunny brushing is good for the soul, we all know that.

Don't let her feel that you think she doesn't know enough, as she could take offense to that. The trick would be to make her feel that she's doing it for you and your wellbeing. :)

Could not put it better myself :D

Hope everything works out for you, take care of yourself.
 
Back
Top