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Edited Title: Think before you post.

MichG

Mama Doe
I am sorry to post this but I have found myself getting increasingly frustrated with the forum, so much so I am thinking of leaving.

I read thread after thread of people who are being criticized for the way they are looking after their rabbits.
For example I read a thread this morning about someone who has 6ft hutches which can be seen from the road and people were criticizing this as her "security" isn't good enough. I then went on to read a thread about a kid who was getting a bunny from P@H and then several members slated her for not getting it from a rescue, at the end of the day it is up to that person and if she didn't buy the rabbit then someone else would have, and that person may not care enough to join a forum such as this to get advice and read tips on caring for their bun, it may have ended up in someones garden stuck in a 3ft hutch with no run for the rest of it's life. I then went on to read how the hutch he is getting/has got is far too small etc etc, people not giving recommendations but being rude, the kid is only 12. Comments such as I'm sorry, in my opinion, your 'best' is not really good enough. You know what is best for the bunny and it should be provided, otherwise, its best to not own one. The run sounds good and attached to the shed would be great, but A HUTCH IS NOT ENOUGH. http://www.rabbitwelfare.co.uk/ahutchisnotenough.htm

Is this really helpful advice? I think it is downright rude and nasty, is this person perfect?

May I remind people that the "hutch is not enough" and "6ft x 2ft x 2ft" are only recommendations, and people should not be slated or victimised because their hutch is not that size.

I feel that many new rabbit owners come to the site to find out more about their bun and caring for it, but they end up leaving pretty shortly after due to being upset by members who tear them apart for the smallest thing (such as having sawdust in the hutch), it is not the members fault about the sawdust, it is the pet shops who sell it to them. Instead of people getting kind advice such as "have you thought about changing to megazorb" etc I am seeing things like "You must never use saw dust, it is terrible" people aren't getting advice, they are being told what to do.

No one here is perfect or the perfect bunny owner, god knows I am not, but I do try my best for them. I am sure some of you would tell me I am a terrible bunny mum, none of them have 6ft hutches (although they all have bigger runs than the "recommended size" and are never shut in their hutches, 24 hr run access before you all jump on me!) and I am sure other things I do are wrong. That's why I rarely post in the pictures section any more.

I think more sensitivity on how things are said would be nice and not jumping down peoples throats for having the "wrong size hutch" etc would mean members would stay around longer and not feel pushed out and like they are doing the wrong thing, at least they have joined a rabbit forum to find out more.

I am sorry about the rant but I am just finding this more and more a problem on here, this should be a nice place to come and post for advice.

I hope all this makes sense, I do tend to ramble when I feel mad at something.
 
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MichG said:
then everyone slated her for not getting it from a rescue

I suggest losing the huge over generalisation, because some people didn't, and some peopple were kind and wanted to help.
 
Not trying to encourage personal attacks but stop them, I am fed up of seeing personal attacks on this site.
 
Not trying to encourage personal attacks but stop them, I am fed up of seeing personal attacks on this site.

So report them. :wave:

The system is there, for exactly that.
Note: This is ONLY to be used to report spam, advertising messages, and problematic (harassment, fighting, or rude) posts.
 

:lol::lol::lol:

I was just going to link to the same thread but it was the section re. tone of posts that I picked up on & ganging up etc, which is the main 'rant' I picked up on from Mich's post & (although I haven't seen the threads highlighted here) I do think it's a fair point and have seen it happen a lot.

Tone of Posts
The forum should be a supportive place to visit. It is possible to disagree with something without turning it into an insult. Sometimes it's not what you say but how you are saying it that causes a problem. For example, if someone is feeding their rabbit in a way you consider bad you could say:

"Why are you feeding your rabbit that rubbish? You should have done more research and fed it this instead. You better change it quickly before your rabbit dies."
Or

"Have you thought about swapping to pellets? Quite a few forum members feed these as they have more fibre so are better for their gut."

The first is likely to get you a warning from admin and chase the rabbits owner away. The second is friendly and tactful and will encourage the owner to listen to your advice. Sometimes it's difficult to be patient if you see something happening you think is wrong but staying calm and polite will generally get the most successful response in the end.

Also consider replies by other members. Multiple posts from different members raising the same issue can feel like being 'ganged up on'. Consider whether your post adds anything constructive.
 
Not trying to encourage personal attacks but stop them, I am fed up of seeing personal attacks on this site.

:wave: I can see that, I agree with you - I don't think anyone means any harm however I just think we can ALL get a bit upset/over enthusiastic about things that are emotive, apart from me that is - I'm always a good girl :lol:
 
Hmmm, I don't agree with that. Ok, so some people could be a bit more tactful with the way they word things, but I can understand it can get very frustrating for people when they try to do the best by the rabbit, but the owner doesn't listen.

When I joined here I knew nothing about rabbits- I bought Oscar from a breeder, was keeping him in a tiny cage with sawdust. Through the advice on here given to me he now free ranges, has good hay to eat, good pellets, a friend, is vaccinated and neutered and our vet complements us on how healthy he looks. I never felt pressured into doing any of those things, it was always friendly advice and hints.
 
Sorry got over excited when typing, have edited.

Better, thanks :) It's pretty harsh when someone has tried to help, and be nice and not 'full on' and then someone accuses 'everyone', which obviously includes them, of being rude or whatever.

I do think that threads like this get people's back up though, and with regards to Karen's quote, to get the message across, the tone of a post like this could make a difference from making people think, and just putting their back up.

Tone of Posts
The forum should be a supportive place to visit. It is possible to disagree with something without turning it into an insult. Sometimes it's not what you say but how you are saying it that causes a problem. For example, if someone is feeding their rabbit in a way you consider bad you could say:

"Why are you feeding your rabbit that rubbish? You should have done more research and fed it this instead. You better change it quickly before your rabbit dies."
Or

"Have you thought about swapping to pellets? Quite a few forum members feed these as they have more fibre so are better for their gut."

The first is likely to get you a warning from admin and chase the rabbits owner away. The second is friendly and tactful and will encourage the owner to listen to your advice. Sometimes it's difficult to be patient if you see something happening you think is wrong but staying calm and polite will generally get the most successful response in the end.

Also consider replies by other members. Multiple posts from different members raising the same issue can feel like being 'ganged up on'. Consider whether your post adds anything constructive.

I know what you're trying to do, but rants don't tend to have a positive outcome, although a carefully worded post, might.
 
Please don't go.

Think of all the help, advice and support there is here.

Try to weigh up the postives against the negatives.

Some people are just more brusque in their comments. Don't take it to heart .

Our common aim is to help bunnies.

I hope you will re-think.

Take care. x
 
Thanks, I just find it upsetting that so many new members come for help and advice and it seems so many of them are young or teenagers who don't have control over what hutch they get as they are not the ones with money etc and they end up feeling upset and leaving (or say they will leave)
I guess it is the way people word things sometimes that comes across as forceful. I just think the number of this type of post has increased in the past few weeks, of course we all want what is best for the bunnies, but maybe thinking of wording things more sensitivly before typing would be a good idea in some cases.

To be fair the majority of members on here are really helpful and kind, it's just a few that can sometimes come across as harsh.

I can find examples of these threads if people want them, but I feel that would come down to personal attack which I am not trying to do, more to make people think of the impact of what they write before they write it.

Personally I find that if someone is rude or critical about the way I do something I am far less inclined to listen to them than I would if they were more polite about it and I am sure there are many others who feel the same.
 
Hope you feel better about things now and don't leave - your brave putting this out there and the forum needs people like that :wave:
 
See, i just steer clear of posts that are gonna get me riled, works well for me and means that i stay here.
There are too many decent folk here to leave :)
 
its always better that someone is on RU and asking for advice (or generally finding out the best way to care for their buns) than not. so they shouldnt be slated for doing that. so many people out in the world just dont bother and think that a hutch IS enough, is so so sad to think about.

please dont leave!
 
I agree 100% with the original post, it's something that I do find surprising...

people have come here for advice and get slated for their current set up, they are looking for advice coming here yet get moaned at...

I know if i had come here looking for advice and got spoken to like some people have, I would have probably left... (perhaps for the better! :lol::lol:)

But I know I didn't have the required hutch size when I first got Zoidberg,but it's a learning curve, and now I know they are looked after and happy in an appropriate sized hutch/run and access to enough free range time.

A lot of it is down to RU and raising awareness, dont stop people coming here by being rude/mean.

As thumper says, if you've not got anything nice to say then don't say anything at all
 
I agree with the OP.


I seen a few people be very judgemental towards new bunny owners, and sometimes i feel that i have to be very careful about what i say incase i get jumped on!

But generally, everyone on here is really nice, the people that are not... i just ignore
 
I agree with the OP.

Maybe some folks don't have 'perfect' set ups, but by being allowed to ask questions, have polite and helpful answers (rather than just being slated and criticised) then more people will stick around rather than go elsewhere for info.

This is a great place for info, but it doesn't need large numbers of members ramming the same thing down a new members throat. Especially if they don't know that the new member is a child (although everybody should be treated with respect, whatever their age)
 
I agree with the OP.

Maybe some folks don't have 'perfect' set ups, but by being allowed to ask questions, have polite and helpful answers (rather than just being slated and criticised) then more people will stick around rather than go elsewhere for info.

This is a great place for info, but it doesn't need large numbers of members ramming the same thing down a new members throat. Especially if they don't know that the new member is a child (although everybody should be treated with respect, whatever their age)

totally agree! :D
 
I am sorry to post this but I have found myself getting increasingly frustrated with the forum, so much so I am thinking of leaving.

I read thread after thread of people who are being criticized for the way they are looking after their rabbits.
For example I read a thread this morning about someone who has 6ft hutches which can be seen from the road and people were criticizing this as her "security" isn't good enough. I then went on to read a thread about a kid who was getting a bunny from P@H and then several members slated her for not getting it from a rescue, at the end of the day it is up to that person and if she didn't buy the rabbit then someone else would have, and that person may not care enough to join a forum such as this to get advice and read tips on caring for their bun, it may have ended up in someones garden stuck in a 3ft hutch with no run for the rest of it's life. I then went on to read how the hutch he is getting/has got is far too small etc etc, people not giving recommendations but being rude, the kid is only 12. Comments such as I'm sorry, in my opinion, your 'best' is not really good enough. You know what is best for the bunny and it should be provided, otherwise, its best to not own one. The run sounds good and attached to the shed would be great, but A HUTCH IS NOT ENOUGH. http://www.rabbitwelfare.co.uk/ahutchisnotenough.htm

Is this really helpful advice? I think it is downright rude and nasty, is this person perfect?

May I remind people that the "hutch is not enough" and "6ft x 2ft x 2ft" are only recommendations, and people should not be slated or victimised because their hutch is not that size.

I feel that many new rabbit owners come to the site to find out more about their bun and caring for it, but they end up leaving pretty shortly after due to being upset by members who tear them apart for the smallest thing (such as having sawdust in the hutch), it is not the members fault about the sawdust, it is the pet shops who sell it to them. Instead of people getting kind advice such as "have you thought about changing to megazorb" etc I am seeing things like "You must never use saw dust, it is terrible" people aren't getting advice, they are being told what to do.

No one here is perfect or the perfect bunny owner, god knows I am not, but I do try my best for them. I am sure some of you would tell me I am a terrible bunny mum, none of them have 6ft hutches (although they all have bigger runs than the "recommended size" and are never shut in their hutches, 24 hr run access before you all jump on me!) and I am sure other things I do are wrong. That's why I rarely post in the pictures section any more.

I think more sensitivity on how things are said would be nice and not jumping down peoples throats for having the "wrong size hutch" etc would mean members would stay around longer and not feel pushed out and like they are doing the wrong thing, at least they have joined a rabbit forum to find out more.

I am sorry about the rant but I am just finding this more and more a problem on here, this should be a nice place to come and post for advice.

I hope all this makes sense, I do tend to ramble when I feel mad at something.

i agree i feel like this all the time for little things like not getting my rabbit vaccinated for example it doesnt matter what anybody else says that may choice and if i get unlucky and he gets something well then its my problem to bear.

i know people are trying to help and they dont want any bunnies to suffer but it doesnt matter as long as the rabbit is in a nice clean home. take scooter for example his cage is clean i see to that everyday and his cage has been modified so many times just to make sure that is had everything in thgt he likes and needs. his quality of life has already changed now by a lot. there are not that many rabbit owners that i know that would do as much for scooter as i have especially given his personality if a 5 year old had him as a pet she would have only had him for a month before they sent him somewhere else.

ive been in that many arguments on here since i joined for silly things that ive either said or thought about doing and other people have taken half of it the wrong way. its getting silly i think yea everyone is entitled to there own opoin but they shouldnt force it on other this website was made to advise people not critize there way of caring for a pet. not only does it upset people but it makes them never want to come on here again which ive felt like doing many times and ive not left yet because i could do with the help for scooter. its more for his benefit then mine really, i still come on here every time no matter how many times i get critised.
 
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