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Grieving and confused

MarieAnson

Warren Scout
Hello everyone

I feel that I need to get some support and possibly advice, hence this post.

Last Thursday morning, my son discovered my darling rabbit, Thomas laid on his side in our conservatory. He claims he saw his leg twitch and when my DH arrived to take a look Thomas had just passed away :cry:
My DH said that there was nothing obvious to indicate why Thomas has died, but he noticed that he did have a small amount of white around his nose/mouth.

Thomas was a beautiful lionhead and was only 11 months old. I had acquired him from a lady, who for personal reasons was forced to part with him. I had owned him for 7 months. He lived as a house rabbit, having ownership of our large conservatory. He had so much space and freedom and appreared to be a very healthy and happy boy.
Thomas was my second lionhead, my first Missy came to me by complete fluke as she was found on a gold course behind our house and despite posters and appeals no one came to claim her, so she became mine. She lived in the house too, but she always had a runny bottom which I kept clean and one day I was trying to be helpful and kind, so I put her out in a hutch in the garden during the nice weather. I am sure you have read ahead and have already guessed what happened to her. Yes flystryke. I was devastated and blamed myself for her death. It took me three years to get over Missy and when I heard about Thomas I felt ready to embrace another bun.

The night before Thomas' death I visited him to say goodnight, just before I went to bed. I put him his lamp on and went to close the windows. Thomas was sat on the floor and usually when I walk by him, he hops off, but he didn't he remained sat. I closed the windows and then knelt down beside him, he remained there. I stroked him and then picked him up in my arms and he accepted the cuddles we often had. He didn't seem ill, he wasn't bloated, hot or anything. I then put him down and unusually for him, he hopped off behind the sofa, which is where he would hide away if he wanted to. I remember saying to him 'well if that's how you want to be then i'll see you in the morning' How tragic to now know that I would never see him again!
The following morning was chaotic in our house and I was late for work, so I didn't get to pop in a see Thomas before I left for work, that is why my son discovered him minutes later.

Call this coincidence but Thomas and Missy, both died on exactly the same day and around the same time :shock:

I am beside myself with grief at the loss of Thomas, given that he appeared to be a healthy, happy bun. The vet looked at him soon after his passing and she could find no signs or indicators as to why he died, she put it down to his heart, or a stroke.

I am racked with guilt. I wanted to put everything right with Thomas because of the horror of what happened to Missy and is someone up above trying to tell me I can't have rabbits? I am constantly going over the 'what if' scenarios in my head. Thinking that he was dying whilst I was getting ready for work :cry:

One thing that is holding me back and I can't stop worrying about is. Was Thomas ill because of the warm weather? THis may seem an odd thing to ask, but as I have mentioned, Thomas lived in our conservatory, and as most of you will know they do get very warm in the daytime. Thomas would stay behind the sofa in the heat and we opened windows and he had access to water and food.
Each night, after a warm day he seemed find and during the days, displayed no signs of heatstroke or distress. I did on a couple of occasions place him outside in his indoor cage, but as he wasn't used to the outdoors it seemed to stress him out as he would push around his water/food dish and his litter tray and nose the door to get out.
Could the repeated exposure to warm temperatures in the daytime have caused his sudden death?

I am absolutely devastated. I can't bear to look into the conservatory, because when I do I see Thomas sitting in his favourite spot and then my heart sinks, realising he has gone. I can't cope with the grief right now and I am not getting much support from my family, as in their eyes he was just a rabbit and I need to get a grip!
I haven't eaten since he died as I can't face it and I have a constant aching in my heart.

Is there anyone that can help me make sense of this?

Thank you.
 
I've absolutely no idea what may have happened to Thomas but I just wanted to say I am very sorry about what's happened. Sleep tight little Thomas xx
 
I am so sorry for your loss:cry: I know how hard it is too:cry:

I think you could put a thermometer in the conservatory to see how hot it gets. Had he eaten or pooed that night/morning?
 
I'm sorry I have no answers, but I understand the grief and how lonely it can be when no one around you seems to understand. I'm so sorry you lost him :( Binky free Thomas xx
 
Hancy14

I cleaned him the night before and I asked the same thing to DH. He said there was no poo in his litter tray that morning but he had wee'd where he was layed.

Thanks for your understanding. x
 
Hancy14

I cleaned him the night before and I asked the same thing to DH. He said there was no poo in his litter tray that morning but he had wee'd where he was layed.

Thanks for your understanding. x

If there was no poo produced (especially overnight, you can get a gap in the afternoon with somebuns) then its a possibility he had GI Stasis - i'm probabl not the best person to explain it, but in simple terms its where the digestive system stops moving, either due to not eating because of teeth problems/bloat and/or pain or a blockage - it can strike frighteningly quickly which is why alot of us on here are obsessed with rabbit poo as that, or lack of it, can be one of the first signs something is up tummy-wise.

There are more subtle signs, such as not moving or running away when they normally would, sitting in a hunched up position or stretched out and the biggest giveaway, for me anyway, is not eating or much reduced eating.

Heat can affect rabbit in a bad way, but you can buy ice-pods (pad things you stick in the freezer) or freeze bottles of water for them to sit on/next to, but the fact that with hindsight he seemed a bit iffy at bedtime may mean he had stasis? I'm no vet and it could well have been his heart, unfortunately there's no way of knowing for sure now, but I'm sure this isn't a sign you shouldn't have buns, they obviously mean alot to you for you to be so devastated at their passing.
 
I agree with paulinejoe.

I used to think Iwas cursed when it came to rabbits. Mine all died so young:(

It wasn't until I found all the info on this forum and my very rabbit savvy vet that things have changed. So I totally understand that feeling too.:cry:
 
You poor thing!!!!
I am currently putting ice on my eyes as I found my beautiful elderly gentleman rabbit dead yesterday. I was able to check on him at 1.30 ish but had to go back to work til 7ish.
I haven't really stopped crying hence puffy eyes and icing them.

I have every confidence that you have done NOTHING wrong!!!!!

There are pet bereavement services available if you need them.

I have family and friends who know Peter Rabbit was like family to me and that I need an official period of grief.

You need to eat a little something yourself or you'll physically be in no state to handle your grief xxx


Hancy14

I cleaned him the night before and I asked the same thing to DH. He said there was no poo in his litter tray that morning but he had wee'd where he was layed.

Thanks for your understanding. x
 
You poor thing!!!!
I am currently putting ice on my eyes as I found my beautiful elderly gentleman rabbit dead yesterday. I was able to check on him at 1.30 ish but had to go back to work til 7ish.
I haven't really stopped crying hence puffy eyes and icing them.

I have every confidence that you have done NOTHING wrong!!!!!

There are pet bereavement services available if you need them.

I have family and friends who know Peter Rabbit was like family to me and that I need an official period of grief.

You need to eat a little something yourself or you'll physically be in no state to handle your grief xxx
My heart goes out to you both having lost your beloved bunnies.
I think it is a natural part of the grieving process to blame ourselves and question the what ifs? But you clearly loved Thomas very much and sadly rabbits are highly unpredictable and often it's hard to tell when they are poorly due to them being prey animals and being very good at hiding it. As someone has already rightly said sadly you can't know for sure what Thomas died of but it very possibly could have been an intestinal blockage or something which in itself is notoriously hard to spot:cry: I recently lost my boy Bob(6 weeks ago) to this and very nearly my other beautiful boy Nobby,thankfully Nobby's was caught in time. Losing a bunny is so very painful and sadly many people don't understand but people on here will always be there to offer words of comfort/advice which is much needed in times like these. Please please know that you were obviously a wonderful bunny mummy, it's clear how much both Thomas and Missy meant to you.I have lost several bunnies at young ages, even one of my vets said how sad it was but I wonder if I get sent them for a reason,to love and comfort them in their short lives-it doesn't offer much comfort when they go though. I hope one day you feel strong enough to love another bunny as I truly think only another bunny can really heal the painful wounds in time-we never forget the ones we have lost or stop loving them,we simply learn to love another. Sending big hugs to you at this dreadful time.xxxx
 
My heart goes out to you both having lost your beloved bunnies.
I think it is a natural part of the grieving process to blame ourselves and question the what ifs? But you clearly loved Thomas very much and sadly rabbits are highly unpredictable and often it's hard to tell when they are poorly due to them being prey animals and being very good at hiding it. As someone has already rightly said sadly you can't know for sure what Thomas died of but it very possibly could have been an intestinal blockage or something which in itself is notoriously hard to spot:cry: I recently lost my boy Bob(6 weeks ago) to this and very nearly my other beautiful boy Nobby,thankfully Nobby's was caught in time. Losing a bunny is so very painful and sadly many people don't understand but people on here will always be there to offer words of comfort/advice which is much needed in times like these. Please please know that you were obviously a wonderful bunny mummy, it's clear how much both Thomas and Missy meant to you.I have lost several bunnies at young ages, even one of my vets said how sad it was but I wonder if I get sent them for a reason,to love and comfort them in their short lives-it doesn't offer much comfort when they go though. I hope one day you feel strong enough to love another bunny as I truly think only another bunny can really heal the painful wounds in time-we never forget the ones we have lost or stop loving them,we simply learn to love another. Sending big hugs to you at this dreadful time.xxxx

How wonderfully put, and all so true:cry:
 
I'm so sorry about your little Thomas - your post made me cry :( I think most on here understand your grief x
 
Sorry - wouldn't let me edit my post above - it's just that something very similar happened to my friend's bun and that was VHD:(
 
I'm so sorry for your loss. :( Thomas sounds like he was very much loved and you must miss him terribly. There are, unfortunately, quite a few possible causes and rabbits hide their illness so well that sometimes it's impossible to tell until it's too late.

It's a very sad coincidence that Thomas died on the same day as your other bunny, and I do believe it's just that - coincidence - not a sign that you shouldn't have any more.

Take care. x
 
Oh gosh Im so sorry, what a sad story :cry:

As has already been said, there are numerous things that could have caused this. The lack of poops over night does seem to point to GI stasis or a blockage in the intestines. Unfortunately these things can come on very suddenly and kill very rapidly :(

I lost my bun Tilly last year to a blockage, so I know how you are feeling. I woke up one morning and she didnt come for her breakfast, so I got her to the vet straight away. Later that day she died in my arms :cry: I still even now question whether it was something I did wrong. But deep down I know that it wasnt my fault, unfortunatly alot of buns die this way. I gave her the best love and care that I could, and it sounds like Thomas too was a very loved and well cared for bunny :love:

Please ease up on yourself, try and eat something because you dont want to get ill on top of your grief :cry: Thinking of you xxx
 
your loss has made me cry too, there are no words of comfort when losing a pet, the grief is unbearable I know, am so very sorry for the loss of your bun, if I was there I could at least hug you, I don't know what else I can say:cry:
 
Thanks you all so much for your kind words and general understanding of the bigger picture.

@Scatter The vet made no mention of VHD. It did cross my mind but I am still at a loss.

God bless you all and I hope your buns remain healthy and happy.
I do hope that one day I will be strong enough to help another bun, but for now I need some time to adjust.

x
 
it will get better Marie, you just need some time. Just remember all the love your bun had and I am sure he knew how much you love him in giving you some back.......oh damn I am just no good with words at times like this, I should just shut up really
 
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