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Learning to say 'no'

Sky-O

Wise Old Thumper
Financially money is tight (stressfully so). Ironically, the amount I spend on my bunnies is a lot, but its manageable. The reason money is so tight is due to me helping out other bunnies and owners. I can't bear to let a bunny down, but I'm going to have to start saying 'no'. I can't help them all, but its already making me feel terrible. I think I'm also an easy target to be taken advantage of too, which I also need to stop. Not sure how to do either of these though. Just have to try and keep my bunnies in my head because they are my priority.

I hate my head when it gets in a whirl. I just feel like a let down and, like many other people, wish I could help more than I can.

I just need my bunnies to be ok.
 
It's hard, but it's your bunnys who are depending on you. I always put my lot before any others, and then help out others in other ways I can. My friends guinea pigs got a lot of Charlies baby cast offs, though :lol:
 
Financially money is tight (stressfully so). Ironically, the amount I spend on my bunnies is a lot, but its manageable. The reason money is so tight is due to me helping out other bunnies and owners. I can't bear to let a bunny down, but I'm going to have to start saying 'no'. I can't help them all, but its already making me feel terrible. I think I'm also an easy target to be taken advantage of too, which I also need to stop. Not sure how to do either of these though. Just have to try and keep my bunnies in my head because they are my priority.

I hate my head when it gets in a whirl. I just feel like a let down and, like many other people, wish I could help more than I can.

I just need my bunnies to be ok.

You have to put yourself and your buns first..I hate to think anyone would take advantage of your generous nature :cry:

Next time someone asks for something just say, I am so sorry I cannot afford it at the moment and leave it at that, hope you can :wave:
 
You have to put yourself and your buns first..I hate to think anyone would take advantage of your generous nature :cry:

Next time someone asks for something just say, I am so sorry I cannot afford it at the moment and leave it at that, hope you can :wave:

I have improved, and I guess I can advocate for us, but it still breaks my heart.

Having said that, the RSPCA have decided I'm so valuable that they can't do without me and whilst I don't want to claim from their buckling branch, I can claim if I need to (so trying to do this to a minimum).

Mine are my priority. They have to be. I have three fosters that are somewhat 'stuck' here and we would dearly love to keep them all, but that's not practical, so they will hopefully be rehomed into wonderful homes, but rabbits are not shifting, so that's unlikely to be for a while.

Just a couple of things I saw over the past couple of days made me realise exactly how much money I've spent on other people's bunnies over the past couple of months, for very little appreciation from those people. If I hadn't, I would be quite comfortable really.
 
Since starting to foster, I realise how easy it is to get overwhelmed. I feel like I could take in 100 rabbits and the rescue would still not have rescued all the rabbits on its list. I am fortunate to be able to say that I only have room for 2 singles or one pair and am not the one who is fielding calls from owners desperate to get rid of their unwanted animals.

Concentrate on what you can achieve and don't feel guilty about the rest. Your rabbits are your priority. Don't underestimate how much you are helping rabbits on this forum by helping and educating owners. Have a break from helping others, take some time out and get your perspetive back. You will come back stronger and more able to see where the real need is for your skills and abilities.:wave::wave:
 
I don't know much about this apart from what you've written here on this thread. I can't add anything more than what has already been said but just wanted to say don't feel bad about it ((((hugs)))))
 
I'll back you up in saying no if you back me up!
I try to accept my own limitations-health and financial-but i get so despondent at times that things have to be like this now.

Hugs x
 
Sky if you stretch yourself too far you end up helping nobody, you know your limits and have to stick to them in order to do what you can. Saying no is kind of helping by not taking on too much.

I hope that makes sense to you.
 
I'll back you up in saying no if you back me up!
I try to accept my own limitations-health and financial-but i get so despondent at times that things have to be like this now.

Hugs x

*hugs back* We can do it together!

And loppy ears, I know I'm useless and not helping anyone, that's part of what makes me try, but I do know that that's not actually going to make me more useful. I guess the point that its pointless is another reason to stop. :)
 
I have the same problem.

I find it difficult to say 'no' if I'm asked to take in a bun who would otherwise be PTS (like in the case of Perry and Vernon) or one who's poorly (like Pudding, Gremlin or Gypsy).

I don't like having the death of an animal on my conscience, and feel like it's MY fault, rather than the a-hole who dumped them or didn't want to pay for vet treatment in the first place.

My OH has a more pragmatic approach, and thinks that people shouldn't pass problems on...which I guess is true in a 'perfect' world, but I take the attitude that each little life is worthwhile and you should try to help all you can.
 
*hugs back* We can do it together!

And loppy ears, I know I'm useless and not helping anyone, that's part of what makes me try, but I do know that that's not actually going to make me more useful. I guess the point that its pointless is another reason to stop. :)

No way is that what I said, you are not useless, what I meant was there is only so much anybody can give and if they are pushed beyond the limits then everything falls apart, hugs to you sky you are not useless, I feel awful that you thought I said that.
 
No way is that what I said, you are not useless, what I meant was there is only so much anybody can give and if they are pushed beyond the limits then everything falls apart, hugs to you sky you are not useless, I feel awful that you thought I said that.

Ah ok, sorry. Just probably added my own interpretation on it based how I feel anyway. :lol:
 
Saying 'no' is hard but it causes less problems than saying 'yes' when we are no longer in a position to do so, be that due to financial reasons or the number of Rabbits we already have.

I now have to point people toward other sources of help as I cannot take in any more Rabbits. Doing so would significantly compromise the one's I already have. Their welfare has to be my priority.
 
aaah hun - thats aweful....saying no is hard to do - like you said your buns are your priority and until you have extra finances to help more - you have to place your bunnies first & foremost.....:)

Just wanted to add though - that the advice you give on the forum is so very valueble & appreciated...so please do know that you have helped so many of us & our buns in this way too.....:love:
 
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