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View Full Version : the right thing to do?



kinsandkinnies
09-01-2011, 10:35 AM
Hi
in november i had to have my bunny parsley put to sleep, we rescued him from a bad owner and he had severe dental problems, which i had him straight to the vets for surgery (twice) but his case was so bad his mouth just wouldnt heal and his back teeth were growing so quick he would had to have surgery monthly he was in a bad way which led to me feeding him by hand, giving him his medicine etc so i developed a strong motherly bond with him so when the vets told me having him put to sleep after trying so very hard to fix him was the hardest thing i have ever done because it wasnt like losing a pet i lost a child. I buried him in the back garden and made his grave pretty (this was in november) now i have heard that you can watch a pet cremation service ( i never knew you could do this and was worried i wouldnt get my baby back)now im thinking and would love some advice on the right thing as im not sure, what half of me is thinking i should dig his little coffin up and have him cremated so when i die he can be buried with me ( i will be moving from my parents home in about a year, hence i feel i will be kind of leaving him behind) or do i leave him to rest where he is, my parents own their home and they would never disterb him, but what about when something happens to them, im so worried about a new owner of the house disterbing his body its killing me, or am i still grieving and thats why all these worries are spinning in my head? i mean im sure my parents would live in this house for many years and by then maybe my loss would feel different as i guess you kind of move on but at this moment in time im very torn on the right thing to do i would be very grateful for any advice or similar problems

thankyou
gemma

Gillyflower
09-01-2011, 11:25 AM
Hi Gemma, sorry for your loss but take heart knowing you gave Parsley, however short, a much better life than he had known before. We have a bunny, Belle, who has teeth problems and he has undergone several ops which worries me. We've recently found a vet who will clip his teeth without putting him under anaesthetic which is better but still frightening for him. His soulmate, Hoppy, suddenly died on 4/1/11. We don't know the cause and we were at the vets when it happened (having took her to an emergency vet the night before and told nothing was wrong with her!). We were in complete shock and very distraught to lose our beloved girl and had to make a decision of what we wanted to do with her. We've never felt so awful and couldn't make our minds up there and then so we asked if they could keep her overnight to give the family time to agree what would be best. Having agreed to have her cremated so we could keep her in the house, she'd never been an outside rabbit and would still be with her own little family, I couldn't sleep that night thinking 'what if I don't get her back'. The following morning as and when I could speak, I rang the vet to ask questions and got reassuring answers but I still feel have we done the right thing!!! (all my other animals are buried in our garden in trunks, which we have dug up from our previous house and taken with us when we moved).Hugs xx

kinsandkinnies
09-01-2011, 11:55 AM
Thankyou for replying :)
and im vey sorry for your loss also, we had the same problem with the teeth the vets clipped his front teeth every three weeks but it was his back teeth that were the problem as they couldnt remove them, its such a hard decission and i think thats what my problem may be, we kept him indoors due to his poor health and now he is outside away from me :( it so nice to get comments from other bunny lovers as many people think its silly to get so depressed about the loss of a bun but the are such a unique pet they each have a completley different personality

i miss him so much
thankyou
gemma :)

Captain Helen
09-01-2011, 01:09 PM
Sorry, I really don't know what to advise, but I'm sorry for your loss. Binky free Parsley xx

weedug
09-01-2011, 01:48 PM
I'm really sorry for your loss :cry:

I really don't know what to advise about the cremation. One thing to think of though is if you would be able to bear the possibility of his coffin being broken or damaged in some way when he is dug up.

I had a dearly loved bun pts just over a year ago, after trying to nurse her through her illness. Her grave is visible from our lounge window and has a slab over it, so I can leave flowers for her, or have tubs with flowers in.

I too hated the idea of her being outside and all alone in the cold. It took me a long time, but I feel a bit better about it now.

Binky free Parsley x

kinsandkinnies
10-01-2011, 07:38 PM
Thankyou for sharing your own bunny loss experiences, this is all i have been thinking about and after reading your comments i felt a bit better and last night my partner said to me that this was parsleys home and this is where he was loved and treasured, let him rest here in peace where he belongs.Those words made me feel comforted, because he is right this was his home and even if i have his ashes, yes it would be his body but it still wouldnt be him, he wouldnt be licking my arms, doing the little binkies he could manage and i still wouldnt be able to snuggle him, i guess i just want him back and thats the hardest thing to cope with because i cant and all i want is to pick him up and snuggle him and kiss his pretty little face :(

You are all very kind and i really must post on here with happier stories of my other bunny lugs as she is a real character :)
big hugs to everyone and your bunnies x

yvette
10-01-2011, 07:47 PM
Im really sorry about your bunster.As your other half said, leaving bun at the happiest place is best for his spirit.
Perhaps christen a plant from the garden and take a cutting to replant in your new home??
Parsley loved you...and you wont forget him. A part of him will be with you WHEREVER you go.xxxx

Leigh
10-01-2011, 07:53 PM
i know what you are going through - we lost daisy a while ago and made such a quick decision to lay her to rest - but ever since ive sot of regretted it and wished we had waited to have her cremated :( i take some heart in the knowledge that she is under a cherry tree and so when the tree blossoms i know some of her will be there and she has the sunniest spot in the garden.

But when it comes time to move house i will be a complete wreck :/

VickiP
10-01-2011, 08:07 PM
I'm very spiritual aswell and I did dig up my dog (she'd been buried 6 years and was a big dog and it was just her skeleton) when moved recently and she is in a long almost tomb like planter for flowers, it sounds like a joke but, I really couldn't stand to think of her being disturbed and dug up by someone else and tossed in a skip, hence I made the choice to do that, several people understood, a few did think it was weird, my Dad told me I needed help! It's so personal that the only advice really is to do what your heart is telling you - it's something that for me the heart does overule the head - if you will feel better then go for it, it's perfectly normal what your feeling and testimony to how much love you have for your little friend. Trust yourself and your judgement and do what feels right for you. (Hugs) it's a shell of the pet you knew but, I do understand that you want to treat the remains with respect and it is perfectly normal IMO the spirit is in your heart and memories xx

VickiP
10-01-2011, 08:10 PM
i know what you are going through - we lost daisy a while ago and made such a quick decision to lay her to rest - but ever since ive sot of regretted it and wished we had waited to have her cremated :( i take some heart in the knowledge that she is under a cherry tree and so when the tree blossoms i know some of her will be there and she has the sunniest spot in the garden.

But when it comes time to move house i will be a complete wreck :/

Take a cutting of the Cherry Tree in spring and plant it - I moved the Willow tree that was planted when I buried my dog, I had to dig it up to get to her so I took a cutting and it's doing really well in a pot :D

littleboots
10-01-2011, 09:35 PM
So sorry for your loss... I know how you feel.. I lost Rosie "littleboots" in November last year and buried her in the garden (as I have done with my other bridge bunnies... I lit a candle for her everynight for a fortnight... so she would "find her way home to me"..
Its never easy to know what to do and sometimes whatever we do we regret that decision later... but.. you have to think.. his spirit is with you always and.... wherever you go.... he is at the bridge now
I would let him rest in peace... but thats only my opinion.
Take Care

ripminnie
10-01-2011, 09:43 PM
Hiya, I lost my bunny Minnie 3 years ago, I loved her so much and was heartbroken. I felt and still feel today how you do, she is buried in my parents garden (and their house is rented :( ) I often worry about what will happen to Minnie when my mum and dad aren't there anymore, it's awful isn't it :o( I don't know what to advise cos I don't know what to do myself! But just wanted you to know you're not the only one to feel that way xxx