how do i know if berties coping ok after losing his wifey

willow pased away around 3pmish 27th october..and berties been a wreck....i rember bif when her husbun died..she got worse and worse until four days later she lay down to die..she even refused food by then..if bertie hadnt come to me on loan shed have died. he saved her life.
long story they got bonded then willow came along and then bonding didnt work..so bandit joined them and i eventually bonded four..then they unbonded leaving the frenchies willowand bertie as a pair.
they were very devoted to each other.....snuggled as much as the weenies do and as much a bif n bertie used to do.

theyve been attacking him and vice versa...they were having a break form rebonding sessions when willow died a few days after.
i want ideally to rebond them as a trio..but bif n bandit have a thistle hall hutch in the lounge and bertie can only fit in the bottom for a snooze all curled up...if i successfully bond the trio should i leave hutch door open hel have his tent etc and theyll have their hutch but then they canshare.

im worried about him...hes grieving very badly..and hes getting worse....im worried as now he wont even go in his tent he shared with willow....

ideally hed love another frenchie wife..this is the second frenchie wife whos died on him..his first wife died 5 months before we adopted him..and now hes lost willow.he loved bif very much but to be with another bun his size..well she was even bigger:shock: seemd to make him feel complete i guess....

if he doesnt get better should i ring aorund to see if a rescue has a frenchie r similar sized doe and arrange a meeting..would it be ok to just leave him at home so he doesnt get stressed as much as acar journey considering his state......and poss get a doe form a rescue and bring her here....but pen her off from bertie..

im so uset still i make him fel worse and he swins away form the cuddles ive been giving him. hes eating a little but not bertie sized portions..hes eaten a weeny bit of hay and some oat wheat barley hay...and two small spring green leaves..but hes not drinking..hes avoiding the litter tray prefering to use the littlies one and his n willows whilst they were bonding gain.

how do i tell.i have only ever had bif lose oscar...berties a hulking great pile of tears if he could only cry..his heart is broken andhes lonely...even the ats cant get a response form im..theyve been avoiding him in fact as hes so sad and depressed.

i know its ealry days but after bif going downhill all week then ending up laying down to die a few days later...i cant help but panic..i cant lose my big puffalump like this...hes our big soft cuddle monster whos lost his wife and is grieving very very hard.

when do i decide what his options are......im so lost right now..woth bif it was easy..it was heralone..but we have bertie and we have a pair of weenies and two cats...pleasepelase help

It will take time.

Rushing into adopting another Rabbit may not be the best idea. Some Rabbits prefer to be left alone for a while to come to terms with their loss. Additional treats and some new toys to investigate can help. Also, as hard as it is try not to be upset infront of him as Rabbits do pick up on our distress.
I find a change of their environment can help too. So spending a bit of time with him in an area that he'll want to investigate may bring him out of himself for a while.

I agree with Jane, when we lost Muffin, Molly was beside herself. She literally laid on top of Muffins body and refused to move and it would have been a very brave person who tried to lift her off. As much as we wanted to move Muffins body and I wanted to hold him for one last time it was kinder to Molly to leave her be and allow her to grieve. By the end of the day she eventually got up and then was just gently nudging him and we managed to get him out.

For a good few days afterwards she was so sad, but they do come around in their own time with lots of extra love and our vet suggested to leave it no longer than 10 days if we were going to get another because it increases the likelihood of stress related problems if allowed to grieve for too long. We contacted a rescue and found Monty, it was love at first sight and they bonded straight away and they are actually a closer bonded couple.

I am sure Bertie will let you know when he is ready and it might be worthwhile having a word with Bunnymadhouse too as I beleive she has some Frenchies at the moment looking for homes.

I agree, it takes time, as with people, bunnies are just the same.

Like Jane has said, try, however hard it is, not to get upset in front of him,
they pick up on all sorts of vibes.

If you feel the need to have a cry, take time out and go to a different area away from him, when we lost our little girl I had to go out in the garden for a little cry because I didn't want to distress her partner Jetty or their little brother Snowy, once its out of your system then go back to him.

We thought about getting Jetty another partner but he seems to have come round and back to his self again, its taken nearly two months, he has Snowy for company if not to play with but they watch one another and let on when passing each others bedrooms.

I don't think there is any easy answer, but don't try to worry yourself, allsorts will come in to your mind if you do.

it depends on the rabbit if bun is eating then i would give time to greive.. dora stopped eating after snowy went missing and refused any food and believe me itreid every food available from veg to hays to mix warm and cold.... the only thing that stopped her starving(and she did lose a lot of wieght) was a new bunny freind whom she picked... however it varys bunny to bunny some are better left as i said if still eating and helathy then i would give at least a week or two to greive before thinking about introducing another bunny xx

agree with evryone elce so sorry evry bun is diffrent hugs to your bun

thank you all for your advice:wave:

ive taken down the lounge divide giving him fre reign of the lounge..as ive shut the teenies in their sparkling clean hutch. theyve been shocked by him appearing in their hutch wanting a cuddle and chased him out..but hes desperate for company.
youre right he was an is picking up on my grief....today he let me stroke him for a while and tell him how much we loved him.

hes eaten tiny amounts of peelts..a spring grenleaf and a very small amount of hay..hes enjoyed being able to come see us like he used to when him n bif were bonded as a pair. but hes not happy..no binkies...no head binkies..and he awlays got excited and binkied.

his pooos are much much less and a bit smaller than they should be.so weve given him fibreplex tonight and will use the tube up tomorrow.
its odd as berties renouned for pooping even in his sleep on the floor. when he was bif he did some poos in the tray....after id cleaned out the tray he shared with willow and filled it up for him..he got in and did four poos..then another four before i came ot bed. od isntit? hes only done about four poos on the floor and thats cos he was sleeping.

hes very down and lonely still..were playing it by ear..like we did with bif...unlike bif tho he hasnt got a friend lined up for him should the event occurr. anyone got any frenchies with a mild manner needing a home?

i hate leaving him..im so tired lack of sleep and still drained over losing willow...and terrifed hell die next.
im going to ring the vets tomorrow if his poos odnt increase rapidly.

im spending tomorow on the setee with him..i used ot give him cuddles and brushes up there..i hope hell let me..he needs grooming hes moulting and its a chore for him to wash his whiskers right now even.