I'm concerned.....

This may seem like an immensely stupid thread but I would like some advice. I currently have 4 buns of my own, and I lost 2 before I developed the new bunch. They're all very happy (at least, I think they are!!) and a couple of them are special needs. I've been on the forum for a little while and I try to help as much as I can. My OH has banned me from having any more buns here but I am trying to donate and do bunny runs and generally just help as much as I can. Having said that, sometimes I feel like I'm not very welcome on the forum. I know a lot of people have been online for a long time and have been able to take part in a lot of threads and contribute a great deal of fantastic advice and help to people who need it. I cannot spend as much time on the forum as I would like too but that doesn't mean I don't care. Everyone on here cares about buns and I do too. I like to help but just at the moment, I don't really want to contribute as I feel like my contribution is unwelcome.

Aww I'm sure noone has wanted you to feel like that intentionally! What has made you feel that way? I know you posted and offered to help Cat with a bunnyrun and she thanked everyone who had offered to help - I offered too, she just isn;t in a position to take anyone up on that offer right now.

Please don't feel like that, I'm sure there's lots of people who will appreciate any advice you give, even if it's not said....

Hey :wave: I don't feel particularly with it half of the time, in fact there's a thread somewhere that Snowy started that grew to massive proportions about how no-one really feels like they're part of the gang or in-crowd or whatever. Everyone also believes they're all thread killers too (inlcuding me!! :shock.

You're definitely welcome, just keep at it!! Look out for the forum buddies too if you need any extra help or reassurance

Thank you for your message. I know people won't have wanted me to feel like that intentionally - and I would like to say that Jaypot and the Hairy Mob are fab and great!! It's just that I think a lot of people know each other personally and would therefore prefer to correspond with each other. I love my buns and buns in general - hence being on here as much as I can!!! I just would like to feel more like part of the community. XX

Can echo that thread-killer sentiment! I even kill my own threads on post 1 - still nice to talk to myself though!

Beth said:

Thank you for your message. I know people won't have wanted me to feel like that intentionally - and I would like to say that Jaypot and the Hairy Mob are fab and great!! It's just that I think a lot of people know each other personally and would therefore prefer to correspond with each other. I love my buns and buns in general - hence being on here as much as I can!!! I just would like to feel more like part of the community. XX

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I think some people do - but I would imagine there's a lot more people who don't! I've never met anyone from on here, but there are people who I 'talk' to more than others. There's loads of ways of helping out too - don;t know much about bunnyrunning but I would guess that people would rather 'trust' a bunny run to someone they 'know' - be that in person or through contact on the forum - and I guess that's understandable.

From bunnyrun threads I have seen there are generally loads of offers and usually only 1 or 2 are taken up so I wouldn;t take it personally!

Anyone who wants to can feel free to correct me!

:wave:

Beth I didn't see this

(((hugs)))

I think a lot more 'work' is done outside of the forum, talking to people and passing the word, that Buns arn't kid pets, getting others to adopt from rescues rather than buying from shops and getting them to neuter, esp females.

I feel that I have settled here 'cept for that last week, and because of the last week and the advice from Sky-O and Bunny babe has been invaluable, and both me and Princess thank you.

Beth I think your great, esp with offering bunny runs everywhere(esp when petrol/diesel is soooo expensive)

Thread killer here :wave:

I think to make yourself feel heard you have to post post post
I've just started answering as much as I can, even if I have no useful advice to offer

I think it is difficult to feel connected to an online community some times, and yes it can seem weird on here because some people do seem to know each other very well. I also find that a lot of the "action" seems to take place quite a distance from me geographically.

I have only recently become involved in the whole rabbit rescue side of things and I do enjoy reading many of the threads on here from rescuers as they give me ideas and inspiration but I find that when I post on them my posts are often overlooked or I kill the thread but I know this is not personal.

I like this forum, it is generally friendly and rarely forgets is mission. The membership here has changed a lot even sice I became a member, so perhaps people don't like to get to close to people who may not hang around:lol:

Either that or people really don't like me, which is fine too so long as I can keep stealing your advice and recommendations.

You should'nt worry at all. There are 100's of members and some of us just don't have the time or experience to get involved to the same degree as others. I regularly check the forum (maybe once a week) just to see what's going on. The folks I've contacted here have been brilliant! We lost 3 buns to a fox attack earlier this year and were absolutely gutted. This was the place I turned to and everyone was fantastic. The support helped tremendously and was a great comfort. Have got 3 new bunnies now and are thoroughly enjoying them. Love your buns and share the experience with the forum.... Enjoy!

I know what you mean Duracell, I sometimes feel exactly the same!!! I kill threads, I get no response etc etc etc! Whilst I should understand it's not personal, it doesn't always feel that way.

As you said though, I'm still stealing advice and tips!!!!

lottielouise said:

Beth I didn't see this

I feel that I have settled here 'cept for that last week, and because of the last week and the advice from Sky-O and Bunny babe has been invaluable, and both me and Princess thank you.

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Thank you, I think this site is good as you can try to help others with the experiences that you have been through yourself.

I found this site a year ago when I was told Homer had major dental problems, I thought he was going to die. With the support of people on here it helped me realise that this was not the case and he could live a happy life with the treatment from a bunny savvy vet.

I am much more aware of how to look after rabbits now and what to look for if they are not 100%, just by reading others posts.

I don't know what I would do without this site, to learn and help people if I can. I don't care that I am not in with the in-crowd as such but there are plenty of people like us who help as and when we can.

It's just that I think a lot of people know each other personally and would therefore prefer to correspond with each other.

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Beth, Hi !!! I think you are right with the above comment. I've had this happen to me quite a few times (though not recently), I make a comment and it has been entirely ignored, it has almost felt like my post must be invisible. I can recall twice a couple of months ago when I made what I thought were two friendly, long and helpful posts and the conversation carried on after my post as if hadn't even made it.

It is rather like being in a group of people and you say something in a conversation and they entirely ignore you, as they are so busy talking to their mates! It does feel very hurtful and makes you feel like the post you made was worthless. I guess that cliquey groups develop everywhere in life and although mostly people are welcoming both here, and in society in general, there will always be occassions where you aren't welcomed as part of a group. I know it has happened to me in real life too once or twice...you try and talk in a group and everyone kind of looks at you and then carries on their conversation as if you'd not said anything!!!!

Don't let it get you down! Keep on posting and look upon it as a loss for that particular group that you tried to interact with. If their minds aren't open to 'meeting' new people, and they are socially inept, then that's their problem.

I think this is a problem on all forums and not just on this one. I have found some fantastic advice here and had mostly very helpful people give responses to various issues, so just put it down to there being one or two indivduals who aren't interested in socialising with new people.

Hi Beth.

Has anyone done anything to make you feel that way?

If not, my best advice is to just jump in and post more. You can help out by giving advice or if you're not confident on that, finding good links that have the advice, or something like that. People obviously won't know you instantly, but the more you post the more people will know you. That's my theory anyway, and in a month I have racked up over 1000 posts. I personally often feel invisible here, or ignored, but that's the nature of the beast, and the more you get known, the more people will talk to you (unless of course you're a troll or argumentative or something).

So yeh, I would just say jump in and post and post and post

:wave::wave: Hi Beth, I think in time you will find you feel much more comfortable on here, the RU members were extremely kind and helpfull to me, when Billy kept getting abcesses, and when he went to the bridge i was overwhelmed with people comforting me.. Sometimes it does feel as if you are not included, but i honestly think its not a personal thing hun Keep posting like the post above says and i shall defo reply to you, if i can help Deb.x

Honestly, the whole clique/in-crowd thing is a real misnomer. Everyone feels like there is an in-crowd they aren't part of, even the people you perceive to be in!!
Yes there are a lot of people on here who've been around for ages and some people may have met up outside the forum, people who use each other's first names and make you think, "well I could never do that as I'll never know them!"

I've made loads of posts where the conversation has carried on as though I hadn't posted, I've been offended and downright hurt sometimes by it, but I AM very over sensitive and hey, I'm still here!!

Charys is right, all forums are like this you'll get to know people too, you are even by this thread!

Hi Beth.

I agree with Caroline above - I have posted often and the thread seems to carry on regardless of what I have added (or not added). This has made me feel really left out in the past. Now I try not to take it personally.

I guess it must look like I am one of those who have particular friends on here having met a few of the folks that live nearby and so we do tend to post on each others comments. It's nothing to do with wanting to have a clique, honest, but for the most part, I don't get to chat with any of my local bunny folks unless it's on the forum so it gets used as a bit of a catch up zone.

Sorry if anyone has felt left out on one because of me.

I dip in and out of RU, I tend to stick to rabbit threads to be honest as I would otherwise spend far too long on here. I just hope that some of what I say has helped a few folks.

Please don't feel left out, I feel like a part of a whole great big bunny family when I come on here. I think it's made me a better person too, because I have to understand that we all have different ideas on things.

Helen x

awwwwe hugs to you!!!! sadly soemtiems people are not welcome i should know but if you know you can do good on the fourm then you MUST stay on i will be friends with you! :wave:

aw beth i've only been on here a couple of months, it is a great website with loads of helpful people. there are alot of people on here that know each other from rescue centres and all and i can see sometimes why they can get into a heated conversation. there alot of people who work so hard to help rabbits and educate people that it's understandable that they get annoyed if someone undermineds them. so people may not take on board your advice but that does not mean you advice is not appreciated or any good. everyone has a story to tell on here and have had different experiences and different ways of dealing with things and some ways are not always the right way and i think aslong as people have the animal in their best interests then thats more than we can ask for. i hope your not put off. your advice will be useful to alot of people on here. :wave: