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Tell me this gets better

Kirsty&Lola

Mama Doe
I never thought on such a lovely day i could feel so low. Lola and I have just been outside to enjoy the sunshine but it upset me so much to think that Rory never got a chance to go in the garden, because i wanted him to be fully vacc'd before exposing him to a new area:cry: I know he would have loved it.

I am in the process of cleaning the house today. I have cleaned the littler tray and carrier and now starting on the kitchen. Lola has been really brave but i think she was looking for him today. She kept going back into the kitchen and then coming out into the garden again.

I can't stop thinking that if i had waited longer than the 2 weeks between vacc's that he might have been able to cope with it. Or if i should have worried about him more. He was eating and hopping right until the end so i thought he was going to be okay

I know time is a great healer but i can't see the light at the end of this tunnel yet:(

Sorry for rambling, Andy's at work and i'm on my own
 
Kirsty you and Lola have been through a dreadful time. Losing Rory was such a complete shock and of course you will still feel raw with grief. Time may not necessarily 'heal' but it does make living with loss managable.

Personally, and from a completely unqualified position, I think Rory might have had some latent Respiratory Tract problems. Sooz said he had a 'bad' GA when he was neutered. He may have struggled due to a significant amount of damage to his lungs from a previous infection. Bunnies lungs are tiny and sometimes can be badly damaged from scaring, yet the Bun shows no 'symptoms' and even listening to the chest with a stethescope may not give any clues to a problem.

Christabel lost a young Doe during a routine spay. The PM revealed that the Doe only had about 20% of functioning lung tissue. Yet there was *nothing* to indicate a problem beforehand.

Bunnies are such complex little animals. They dont exhibit symptoms in obvious ways. I am sure your Vet would be willing to have a chat with you and maybe help you through this very sad time.

:cry:

Janex
 
There was nothing you could have done hun, you can't do the what if's you did the very best for him.

He is enjoying the garden with you anyway, you just can't see him.

It does get better but it takes time.

Big hugs

xxx
 
I know it doesn't feel like it at the moment but it WILL get easier. I was DEVASTATED when we lost our dutch buck Dizzy and for weeks afterwards couldn't even look at pictures without bursting into tears :cry: I still miss my boy and won't ever forget him ... I am making a special scrapbook of his best photos and all our memories ... and I get to see him in my siggie every time I post. This time last year I still had Molly and Dizzy but if they hadn't left us and gone to the bridge I would never have found this forum, met so many new friends, adopted 5 rescue bunnies and become a foster mum.

My thoughts and hugs are with you at what I know is a very difficult time. We are all here to support you xx
 
I know how terrible and full of grief you are feeling right now.....and unfortunately there is no way to avoid it. The 'whys' and 'what ifs' can drive you crazy, so please don't punish yourself this way. 2 weeks is the recommended time between vaccs, so there is no reason why you should have thought to wait longer. There is NO way that you could have predicted what was going to happen. I think it is just normal to attempt to blame yourself in situations such as this.....but PLEASE don't. As Jane has said, as Rory had a bad time recovering from the GA too, he in all liklihood had some sort of underlying problem which presented no symptoms and no one could have known about. Rory will have been VERY thankful for the home and the love that you gave him, and I am positive that he is smiling down at you and Lola now. It WILL get easier with time, though that probably seems impossible right now. HUGE hugs to you, and noserubs to Lola. xxxxx :( :(
 
I feel so sad for you :cry: :cry: :cry: What you're feeling is all really normal, horrid though it is, and unfortunately is the price for loving something. When I lost my precious Harvey last June I was, and still am, devastated at losing him so suddenly (he was just three) and went through all the "what if's" that you're having now. I still cry regularly, all these months later and miss him terribly, but I do feel that he is with me, watching over me.

Knowing where Rory was before he went to Sooz, I know that his last weeks were spent with people who really cared for him, and you couldn't have done more, and that he was loved. No comfort to you now but in time you'll be able to look back and be happy that you were able to give him the best weeks of his life. Sorry not putting into words very well but I really feel for you and so sad that he hasn't been able to enjoy the life he deserved :cry: :cry:

Take care and don't beat yourself up with all the thoughts you've got swirling around - easy to say and I know very hard to stop them. I kept my friend in Animal Control up to date with Rory's new life and she was so happy that he'd found a lovely new home. She's very sad today at what's happened :cry: :cry: but said how much worse it would have been for poor Rory if it had happened while he was still at the kennels with no-one to care what happened to him.
 
Thanks Becca, it only seems like yesterday that we were swapping bonding stories:cry:

i know i must concentrate on the weeks we have had together not the ones that we have lost but it's hard. I'm just so sorry that he couldn't be with us for longer.

For the people involved with rescuing Rory, i am sorry we couldn't have done more for him. But he stole our hearts and we could never replace him. Just because we can't see him anymore, doesn't mean we won't love him always
 
Kirsty,

My heart goes out to you.

It is so cruel when a life is ended too soon.

I am sure Rory knew how much you cared and spent a wonderful happy few weeks with you.

Lots of hugs,
Vanessa xx
 
It gets better. Eventually you can face photographs and actually smile in fond memory of the time you were lucky enough to have been owned by him.

Neil
 
Thanks Becca, it only seems like yesterday that we were swapping bonding stories:cry:

i know i must concentrate on the weeks we have had together not the ones that we have lost but it's hard. I'm just so sorry that he couldn't be with us for longer.

For the people involved with rescuing Rory, i am sorry we couldn't have done more for him. But he stole our hearts and we could never replace him. Just because we can't see him anymore, doesn't mean we won't love him always

I know. It's so sad :cry:

Rebecca was so thrilled when she heard about the home Rory had with you and Lola. I sent her the link to all the stories about the bonding and the photos of him and the whole of Animal Control were so happy that he'd found such a great home. We were only talking about him last week when I saw her - they knew they couldn't have found Rory a home like Sooz could and were so pleased to hear about him - she has kept asking for updates about him.

I still love Harvey with all my heart - I have a photo framed on the wall at the end of my bed and I still talk to him most days and when Bella and Tarquin get up to mischief I'll turn to his photo and make a joke about how he'd have sorted them out (in actual fact I think they'd have terrified him - he was a very gentle, cuddle bunny which I miss). I love them both very dearly but they can't ever replace Harvey. He's in my heart now and will stay there forever. That will never go, and although at the moment every time you think of Rory you'll be upset, that does fade. I do still cry about Harv, but I can also think of him and smile at the good times we had together and how much I loved him, and still do love him. He's now with my other bridge bunnies and cats and will be waiting for me to join them.
 
I know. It's so sad :cry:

Rebecca was so thrilled when she heard about the home Rory had with you and Lola. I sent her the link to all the stories about the bonding and the photos of him and the whole of Animal Control were so happy that he'd found such a great home. We were only talking about him last week when I saw her - they knew they couldn't have found Rory a home like Sooz could and were so pleased to hear about him - she has kept asking for updates about him.

QUOTE]

Oh no, i'm so sorry. I feel like i've let everyone down. Tell them Rory was really happy here. He did crazy bunny runs around the house and amazing happy flops. He got groomed a lot by Lola and had bunny cuddles. He was a cheeky chap - chewing the bunnyproofing and wriggling under the sofa. Thinking of all these things makes me cry but also makes me feel grateful to have known him
 
I know. It's so sad :cry:

Rebecca was so thrilled when she heard about the home Rory had with you and Lola. I sent her the link to all the stories about the bonding and the photos of him and the whole of Animal Control were so happy that he'd found such a great home. We were only talking about him last week when I saw her - they knew they couldn't have found Rory a home like Sooz could and were so pleased to hear about him - she has kept asking for updates about him.

QUOTE]

Oh no, i'm so sorry. I feel like i've let everyone down. Tell them Rory was really happy here. He did crazy bunny runs around the house and amazing happy flops. He got groomed a lot by Lola and had bunny cuddles. He was a cheeky chap - chewing the bunnyproofing and wriggling under the sofa. Thinking of all these things makes me cry but also makes me feel grateful to have known him

Oh no no - I didn't want you to feel like that. I wanted you to know how happy they were that he'd found his forever home with people that loved him. Anyone could have walked off the street and had him when they were advertising him, and they were so happy that he'd gone to someone who really knew rabbits and wanted to give him the very very best, which is what you did. So sorry if I've upset you :cry: :cry: :cry: I'm not very good at saying what I want to say - it sounds OK in my head but gets all jumbled up. They would much rather he had the happy time with you, however short it had to be, than end up somewhere where he lived a miserable life.
 
Oh no no - I didn't want you to feel like that. I wanted you to know how happy they were that he'd found his forever home with people that loved him. Anyone could have walked off the street and had him when they were advertising him, and they were so happy that he'd gone to someone who really knew rabbits and wanted to give him the very very best, which is what you do. So sorry if I've upset you. I'm not very good at saying what I want to say - it sounds OK in my head but gets all jumbled up. They would much rather he had the happy time with you, however short it had to be, than end up somewhere where he lived a miserable life.

You didn't upset me, i knew what you were trying to say, i just wanted your friends to know that he really was happy here:D
 
You didn't upset me, i knew what you were trying to say, i just wanted your friends to know that he really was happy here:D

You don't need to worry about that - they saw the threads about him and Rebecca was absolutely thrilled to see where he'd ended up. I don't think in their wildest dreams they could have imagined he'd have found such a lovely home - especially after they'd had him on our website for so long without any interest. It's just so hard for you right now and I feel so sorry :cry: :cry:
 
i didn't realise he had been in the pound so long. I don't know how anyone could have resisted those gorgeous big brown eyes! and funky hair do. He really was so unique. He would thump his foot for more attention and even used to thump and binky at the same time - we think this was for added effect:) it may have only been a month but we have some lovely memories which is a comfort to us. thankyou for all your support
 
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